We have 2 young kids and we both do a good share of stuff around the house. He often does more cleaning, and cooking, because I perform the job of looking after the kids while he does it. I’d be happy to swap around but I take longer with cleaning (because I’m more thorough) and cooking has never been my strong suit. I tend to do the vast majority of tidying, washing, and reorganising stuff (and buying furniture / containers etc to make sure the house stays as tidy as possible). Every time he makes food, or does washing, or pretty much anything, I make sure to thank him and praise his efforts.
Tonight I got annoyed with him. After dinner, he took the kids to the lounge before their bath. While he sat with them, I cleaned the kitchen surfaces, cleared and washed up from dinner, folded and put away a mountain of laundry, vacuumed and mopped the floors, and shifted a load of stuff upstairs where we’ve been redecorating. When he brought the kids up for their bath, I was pouring with sweat and it was pretty obvious what I’d been doing. I thanked him for giving the kids their bath (while I’d been lugging all sorts up and down the stairs), and sort of expected he might reciprocate and say thanks for my efforts. Instead he said absolutely nothing and barely blinked when I muttered ‘you’re welcome’. I’m fed up of feeling unappreciated when I go to so much effort, and when I take time to thank him. He says he doesn’t care about hearing thanks, but I don’t know many people that aren’t motivated by a tiny bit of recognition. AIBU to feel this way?