AIBU to think all these sayings are utter nonsense & do you believe them?

[ForeverAintEnough3]

You know the type.
‘What’s for you won’t pass you by’
‘Everything happens for a reason’
‘What goes around comes around’

Inspired by me getting more bad results in a fertility test and idiots telling me ‘everything happens for a reason’

Even if I do get pregnant and have a healthy baby I don’t see what the ‘reason’ was for me to go through 4 years of infertility hell only to parent my child with a severe panic disorder acquired as a result of said fertility treatment. Instead of just conceiving normally when my mental health was good.

I can’t see any reason why people dying tragically young happens. Or people losing their children.

I don’t see any evidence of horrible people getting their just desserts - most seem to be happy out.

I’ve two friends long term single who would love to meet someone. Is there no one out there for them then as apparently what’s for them won’t pass them by.

I can’t stand them! Does anyone else use them/also go crazy when people use them! Any more gems?

“What doesn’t kill you will make you stronger”

No it won’t, that’s utter bollocks.
If it’s an illness, it will just make it easier for the next illness to kill you.
If it’s a horrible/abusive situation, plenty of people never really get over it and carry the scars for the rest of their lives.

I like those sayings but I'm head deep in woo woo stuff. I think I'd be more depressed if I thought I was definitely supposed to have something and never got it. I'd rather believe it wasn't meant to be for some mysterious reason. Like growing up with my father alive, I'd rather believe that was just not meant to be for a reason I can't know than he should be alive and that's just too awful to contemplate. It's a comfort thing I guess. I don't think I've ever said it to someone though, especially not when they're trying for a baby, that's really insensitive.

The only ones I really don't like are victim blame ones 'your reality is what you make of it' sort of thing. It's a nice outlook when stuck in a traffic jam maybe, but it's horrific in the context of rape, murder, poverty, illness etc.

@GrolliffetheDragon

I always remember this from Terry Pratchett:

I had a lovely letter the other day from very religious lady concerned about my health. She said that I should consider my Alzheimer's a gift from God. Frankly, I would have preferred a sweater...

They're all verbal diarrhoea.

A friend with a profoundly disabled child who needs 24/7 care says she wants to smack the hundredth person who tells her ‘God only gives you what you can cope with’ and ‘Special children are only given to special people.’

Or, 'Have you read Welcome to Holland?' 'No, I used it to wipe my arse.'

Or the money won't buy you . . . blah blah blah. My father grew up desperately poor. As he'd always say, 'Money isn't everything, except if you have none.'

As for 'God', I'm not even going to go there, or if I do it's a la Terry Pratchett and Tim Minchin.

The one you really need is "shit happens". Because it does. It doesn't mean you deserve it, it's just that shit happens.

I like, 'Two tears in a bucket, mother fuck it'.

I like “what fresh hell is this” under my breathe when life’s next challenge presents itself…

One I heard a lot in my professional life,,,

"It's not ideal" (it's a fucking disaster) "but we are where we are" (and let's not think about whose fault it is)

All these phrases, I think, are a sort of intellectual or emotional laziness. And the ones that most irritate me are those that try to cite some higher authority, either God (who has a plan) or a sort of cosmic accounting system (what goes around comes around).

I lost someone close to me recently. After the funeral, a relative-by-marriage - older lady, much respected in her church - came up to me, put her hand on my arm and said, as she were privy to inside information that she was prepared share, "...He's in a better place."

I nearly put her lights out.