DP loosing his job again. Not sure if I can do it again.

[Deepblues]

I’m going to rant here as I can’t rant to him/anyone else in real life. I’ll have to be strong as he really suffered with his MH when he was last unemployed.

Over the last 2 years he’s been unemployed for 11 months over two stints - he’ll be going into the third. He finally got a great job in another sector and everything seemed to be on the up. It looks highly likely he hasn’t passed his probation and he’s got a formal meeting about it this week.

Beforehand when he left his job 2 years ago for MH I had a steady job. Bills were covered, a bit of scrimping but he lived off his savings. He got a new job around covid and was the first to be let go. I then lost my job last summer and spent the last year bouncing between zero hour contracts/MNW/temp jobs until now.

The last couple of years have been hard, I’ve worked bloody hard to ensure that all bills have been paid as he’s had debts he’s had to pay. I honestly can’t remember the last time I bought myself something new. He still owes people money (I’ve just found out!) from the last two stints.

I know I sound selfish but I was looking forward to going on holiday, buying some new clothes, getting my nails done again, a decent hair cut, going out with friends etc etc.

While I can cover the bills myself with this wage it’s going to mean no luxuries that I was looking forward to.

And that’s not even taking into account how shit it was for DP and his mental health. Him being in the house 24/7 with his mood plummeting day upon day.

Not sure why I’m writing it here, I guess I’m throwing myself a pity party when I should be thinking of him. I know I’m privileged as there’s plenty of people who have it worse, and just having a roof, safety and food in the fridge makes me better off. I guess I just needed to rant.

This is the weed smoker who bought a new car on finance and turned up with a random puppy? And also gave you no support when your Mum was diagnosed with terminal cancer but moaned on about how you had to be HIS rock?

OP, you would be so much better leaving him and starting again. He is bringing absolutely nothing to this relationship.
He's just bringing you down and sucking the life out of you.

He's financially reckless and can't seem to hold a job down. He's addicted to weed which is not helping anything at all.
He has no interest in giving it up or getting help for his depression so that his life can improve. He gets to roll around on a regular basis doing absolutely nothing, making noises about getting a job from time to time to keep you sweet, while you carry all the weight of financial responsibility, working and paying the bills.
These sort of people also know how NOT to pass probation to make sure they don't have to be kept on and can go back to their partners with a woe is me tale.

Please consider leaving him. This is never going to get better. Get out before your MH spirals.

Why are you with him?

@Atalune

Why won’t he pass probation?

@Atalune because he doesn’t want to.