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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not stop for a dead cat

247 replies

Myusername33 · 26/06/2021 21:37

I recently passed a very recently deceased cat at the side of a busy road when I was driving with my kids in the car, I didn’t stop because I wasn’t going to stop in a busy road and leave my kids sitting there while I picked up a dead cat. I later saw someone had put a post up about the dead cat on the local community fb page saying they had picked it up and taken it to the vet so the owner could be found but they were disappointed that not only had someone hit the cat and not stopped but also lots of people had driven past without stopping, the owner of the cat eventually appeared to say how devastated they were that someone had hit their beloved cat and not stopped.

Aibu to not stop and pick up someone else’s dead cat from the road? I actually think it pretty unreasonable to let your cat out to run around in the road and get annoyed at the person that hit it for not stopping, I’m sure they didn’t set out to run over the cat and it was an unavoidable accident. If I hit a cat I would stop if I could do it safely but my kids and my own safety would be a priority over someone else’s cat that shouldn’t have been on the road in the first place.

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 27/06/2021 09:18

I think if you’d just said you didn’t want it in the car as it would be too upsetting for the kids

I am a bit confused because OP says that particular road wasn't safe to stop on but if it was a residential one they would have stopped. So it was more about it being unsafe to stop than the kids being distressed about having a dead cat in the boot?

HeronLanyon · 27/06/2021 09:19

thegenealogist ‘the mad cat women’ is not a great look on you. You don’t agree with those you characterise as such, fine, but why abusive?

Sparklingbrook · 27/06/2021 09:21

@HeronLanyon

thegenealogist ‘the mad cat women’ is not a great look on you. You don’t agree with those you characterise as such, fine, but why abusive?
And the assumption everyone posting on this thread is a woman. Confused
TheGenealogist · 27/06/2021 09:27

Come on, "mad cat lady" is a common turn of phrase. Lots of cat fans on this thread who can't understand why someone wouldn't stop for their dead animal and getting quite upset and cross with anyone who isn't a cat fan too.

Legoninjago1 · 27/06/2021 09:27

Actually not long ago I did stop. I was on my own though. Not sure I'd have done it with the kids in the car as they'd have been really upset. It was safe to stop and I wanted to check it was dead and also move it off the road.

showerbeer · 27/06/2021 09:28

@sophiasnail

I probably wouldn't stop for a dead cat (that someone else hit) but 1000% would stop for a dead dog. Can't really explain why.
I think this is a pretty rubbish attitude. Cats are just as loved as dogs and your personal preference for animals shouldn’t come into it.
Sparklingbrook · 27/06/2021 09:28

‘Cat fans’ I like that. Smile

JustDanceAddict · 27/06/2021 09:29

You have no idea about cats!
An old cat of ours died in an RTA - we lived in a quiet side road which didn’t really lead anywhere and he still managed to get run over on our road. The fucker didn’t stop, but someone must have taken him to a local animal rescue centre and we eventually tracked him down and could ‘identify’ him as ours.
If you run a cat over and leave it to die then there’s something wrong with you. If you see a dead cat it’d be your civic duty to at least move it to the side and see if it had collar/post on FB. The best thing would be to take to nearest vet.
Unless you keep cats indoors (not really done in this country) they will go where they like, although our current one barely leaves the garden.

HeronLanyon · 27/06/2021 09:30

genealogist of course it’s an oft used phrase. Doesn’t mean is not insulting sexist nonsense. IMO.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 27/06/2021 09:31

How can it possibly be the drivers fault if a cat runs across in front ?

Depends if the driver was one of the speeding twats we get around here.

And to the poster who said 'it's just a cat', to you maybe, to the owner it's not. I think I prefer my cat to some of the posters on here!

RosaBaby2 · 27/06/2021 09:34

I would stop if safe to do so. I would use my coat/jumper whatever I had to move it or take it to a vets.

I would also do the same for any injured animal, I stopped to catch a hare that had been hit. Wrapped him in my cardigan and my 12 year old held it. It's only clothes.

mag2305 · 27/06/2021 09:36

@Sparklingbrook you're right. The uncaring comments on here are luckily not shared with people on fb community groups who often show compassion for a dead/missing animal. Often cats.

Maybe we can assume that some of these mumsnetters are the no pets types.

Animal lovers vs non animal lovers

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 27/06/2021 09:38

OP was probably hoping to stir up the usual MN cat haters!

TheGenealogist · 27/06/2021 09:42

[quote mag2305]@Sparklingbrook you're right. The uncaring comments on here are luckily not shared with people on fb community groups who often show compassion for a dead/missing animal. Often cats.

Maybe we can assume that some of these mumsnetters are the no pets types.

Animal lovers vs non animal lovers[/quote]
But people only reply to FB community posts which affect or interest them. If you're not a mad cat person cat fan, then you scroll past without a "like" or a comment on that post.

Self-selecting responses. Extrapolating that to MN hates cats and everyone on FB community sites are so much nicer and cat loving is illogical.

JustGiveMeGin · 27/06/2021 09:42

I love cats, I have two of my own. Do I have time to stop and take every dead cat I see to the vets for possible identification? Absolutely not.

Sparklingbrook · 27/06/2021 09:44

[quote mag2305]@Sparklingbrook you're right. The uncaring comments on here are luckily not shared with people on fb community groups who often show compassion for a dead/missing animal. Often cats.

Maybe we can assume that some of these mumsnetters are the no pets types.

Animal lovers vs non animal lovers[/quote]
Exactly. Some comments on this thread don’t reflect my RL experiences thankfully.

Seems I live in a pretty normal place .

MolyHolyGuacamole · 27/06/2021 09:47

Don't be so bloody dramatic

Phew, someone else said it

mag2305 · 27/06/2021 09:48

@TheGenealogist I think people on mumsnet can be far worse from what I've seen and it's because everyone's hiding behind an anonymous username, unlike Facebook. I really think Mumsnet can bring out some, horrible, spiteful reactions in people. I wonder if those people would be quite so brazen if we could all see their real names and photos.

If people don't like cats or any other animal, fair enough, but some of the comments on here are so cold and unfeeling.

AbsolutelyPatsy · 27/06/2021 09:52

i would not necessarily stop but more importantly i would not come on mumsnet and start a thread about how i didnt stop

Sparklingbrook · 27/06/2021 09:57

@AbsolutelyPatsy

i would not necessarily stop but more importantly i would not come on mumsnet and start a thread about how i didnt stop
Yes that’s the weirdest thing. Competitive uncaring about cats aside it’s the starting a thread about this in the first place. Confused
OccaChocca · 27/06/2021 10:12

@TheGenealogist

Some cat people are really quite unhinged, aren't they?

All the ridiculous statements about it being like hitting a child and a member of the family.

It's not. It's a cat.

You obviously don't care about animals.

I don't care about children personally but I would stop if I hit one!

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 27/06/2021 10:13

[quote mag2305]@Sparklingbrook you're right. The uncaring comments on here are luckily not shared with people on fb community groups who often show compassion for a dead/missing animal. Often cats.

Maybe we can assume that some of these mumsnetters are the no pets types.

Animal lovers vs non animal lovers[/quote]
I'm a dog person and (I'm afraid) loathe cats with a passion, but I would stop for a dead or injured one of i possibly could. As pp have said, that cat could mean the world to somebody.

MoppaSprings · 27/06/2021 10:14

I’m still not understanding why cats need to be roaming around and can’t stay indoors or in a cat safe garden.

purpleme12 · 27/06/2021 10:15

Some people must live for posting upsetting comments on the internet

Sparklingbrook · 27/06/2021 10:16

Re dogs. I get that you have to stop/report by law. If the dog was dead then I think I could get out and ring the police or whatever you have to do. If it was injured and still alive and likely to bite me out of fear I'm not so sure I'd be getting out of the car to do it.