Soft play. Lack of supervision

[mysterytoddler]

I take my 19 month old DD to soft play most weeks since they’ve reopened. I’m 7 months pregnant with DC2.

I’m so sick of parents not supervising their kids properly. Today was a classic. Another mum with 2 boys, at a guess I’d say that the oldest was 7, youngest 3. Both really boisterous kids. The mum spent most of the time sat at her table on her phone. She checked on them now and again but mostly left them to it. At one point she even took the toddler to the toilet and left the older one completely unsupervised.
I took DD to the large bit of the soft play that’s recommended for older ones which is my own doing but DD is really headstrong and finds the baby bit really boring now. But they were running all over the place and she got knocked over twice.

I also don’t understand why the 7 year old wasn’t at school. Part of the reason we go on weekdays is because it’s quieter and usually full of toddlers. I wouldn’t go on weekends cos I accept that there will be school age kids there.

I’m just sick of it. I manage to clamber all over the equipment and supervise my toddler despite being heavily pregnant. I don’t understand why it’s so difficult for others to do the same

Not that is anyone's business what a mum is doing on her phone, but the reality for many mums on phones is that they are ordering gifts for a birthday party, or booking activities, arranging play dates, paying bills / general life admin and god forbid they catch up with their own friends... these are the things that I personally take the opportunity to do while my kids are running around a soft play.

Ooh, I can't stand when little ones come and get into big kid spaces! I know it's not the same but we were at a park, my children were doing laps of a piece of equipment which was labelled 8+. A mum brought her toddler over and helped her over it but stopped mine from being able to play because it made the equipment wobble!

Perfectly reasonable in the over 5s bit to leave them to it, what on earth were you doing letting your not even 2 year old in? How nasty to judge as well, it might be the only time she gets a bit of downtime, be interesting to see how you get on with 2, maybe you won't be so judgemental then.

I set day here too and DD who is 5 ran round all by herself at soft play today.

@RocksOnTheHill I dont think it's judgey towards parents helping their kids - I have a 5yo and 3yo who can navigate most soft plays but if I know there's a tricky bit or they just want me to play for a bit of course I will.
It's not healthy following them around the entire time you're there though IMO. Mine love feeling that bit of independence when they're there that they can go out of eye sight for a short time, safe in the knowledge that they know where I am and vice verse

Really? You are being unreasonable. Inset day here too. Wouldn't dream of taking my school child to a germ ridden soft play during covid anyway.

I didn't realise so many other parents are judgemental of parents helping their kids

Only when they get in the way of the intended users of the play equipment, i.e. the kids.

Actually I'm always surprised about how considerate older children are at soft play, given the whole purpose is for them to barrel around and knock into things. I've been taking my DC since they were a ten month old crawler and even in smaller soft plays which don't have a separate toddler section we've rarely had an accident. And I've often heard children in groups calling out to the ones behind to be careful of my smaller DC.

@mysterytoddler

Sort of wish I'd headbutted him back

I’m not sure I’d have gone that far

Blimey OP this was one of the small minority of people who was trying to back you up

But surely it’s your responsibility as you took your dd into a section which is for older children.

@GreyhoundG1rl

I didn't realise so many other parents are judgemental of parents helping their kids It's soft play. For kids. How much help could they need?

Read my post... My kids sometimes ask for help for example when climbing to the top. They just need some confidence boosting to get to the top. It never crossed my mind that other parents would judge me for this.

@mysterytoddler

But my toddler was supervised! And yes I’m 40 this year (hence the small age gap between my two) so I realise I may not be very good at guessing ages of women considerably younger than me

If they should have been isolating then that’s even worse!

Her age doesn't matter. YABU, as everyone else said already

YA of course BU.

Your child was in the wrong section.
End of. Stop trying to shame a younger mum, you shouldn't have even brought her age in to this. Let me bring YOUR age in to this. Perhaps soft plays didn't exist when you were a kid or it was so long ago you can't remember. Soft plays are a bit rough, it's a boisterous place to be. Kids love them because they can run wild. You book it knowing that... and keep your child in the appropriate section because of that.

YABU from your OP, but you just get more judgey with each one.

A lazy, young parent. What a cliche 🙄

You sound as mad as a box of frogs OP.
Adults shouldn't really be going into the play frames in soft play. There's lots of signs in the ones I've been to that say no adults.

Imagine if every adult went in with each kid. It would be ridiculous.

😂😂😂😂 please keep them coming OP

@mysterytoddler

Sort of wish I'd headbutted him back

I’m not sure I’d have gone that far

Ah, it was only sort of. I in fact went to the main desk and asked for help getting the seven year old out of the under five's area.

Their response?

To point at the sign that said, "children should be supervised at all times by an adult". Apparently, it is the parent's responsibility to watch their kids. So according to that soft play, you're correct and everyone else on this thread isn't

Nah YABU for complaining that your 19 month old got knocked over in a bit specifically aged for 5 years+. My 6 year old goes crazy at soft play. He's not a knob and I'm guessing the child didn't push your child. They were just being crazy and yours got knocked over. I do what most parents do. Every 10 minutes I'll make sure he's still actually there but otherwise I drink shit tea/coffee and look at my phone. Because, well, soft play is hell on earth.

With the references to age from OP, I can only assume this judgement based on envy.

As for the ‘strong-willed’ toddler, isn’t that code for ‘we let her do as she pleases’?

Ease up on the judgement, OP. By the sounds of it you are not a perfect person or parent. You let your child play in the wrong section, which is far more neglectful than what the other mum did. You’re also teaching your child to break the rules and then blame anyone else for the consequences. Pretty ‘lazy’ parenting IMO.

I didn't realise so many other parents are judgemental of parents helping their kids
If it's a one off the first time a child (the right age for the section) tries something and you don't get in the way then I wouldn't judge that at all. It's the parents who follow their (usually too young for the section) children around inhibiting other children's play. I let DS in sections 'underage' but not before he was ready to be independent in there.

Absolutely nothing wrong with letting your child run wild in a children-running-wild-specific-environment. I love going so I can have a few mins down time.

Also, what's wrong with being late 20s?

And finally, do you know what is very annoying at softplays? Adults with their young babies and children crawling all over the older kids equipment meaning the older children can't use it...

@Getawriggleon

It’s not an inset day in my town and i didn’t get the impression they were homeschooled. The mum looked very young maybe late 20s Ooh watch you don't get chaffing from having your judgey pants hoiked up so high OP.

Keep your young toddler out of the big kid frame and let the rest of us enjoy our coffee in peace.

Yes, this😂😂

Also a good chance the 7 year old should have been at home. My bet? His school bubble burst but rather than stay home as 'required', they're out and about. I've seen it a lot around here.

They were my idea of hell as could never relax like some of other parents but my kids loved them.

Our nearest 3story ball play of hell has just recently closed for good due to not surviving financially hit of lockdown, disappointing as mine of age now I don’t have to watch like hawk because of other boisterous kids.

As for not being a school well there is 101 reasons why not

Also, a group of kids at our local soft play grabbed a younger child and stripped them naked and hid all their clothes in the ball pit. Very Lord of the Flies. Since hearing that I'll grab a coffee and sit down but I always keep one eye on my kids. I just don't trust other kids. They know their parents aren't watching them.

@lastcall

Also a good chance the 7 year old should have been at home. My bet? His school bubble burst but rather than stay home as 'required', they're out and about. I've seen it a lot around here.

Speculation. You have absolutely no idea if this is the case or not.