Soft play. Lack of supervision

[mysterytoddler]

I take my 19 month old DD to soft play most weeks since they’ve reopened. I’m 7 months pregnant with DC2.

I’m so sick of parents not supervising their kids properly. Today was a classic. Another mum with 2 boys, at a guess I’d say that the oldest was 7, youngest 3. Both really boisterous kids. The mum spent most of the time sat at her table on her phone. She checked on them now and again but mostly left them to it. At one point she even took the toddler to the toilet and left the older one completely unsupervised.
I took DD to the large bit of the soft play that’s recommended for older ones which is my own doing but DD is really headstrong and finds the baby bit really boring now. But they were running all over the place and she got knocked over twice.

I also don’t understand why the 7 year old wasn’t at school. Part of the reason we go on weekdays is because it’s quieter and usually full of toddlers. I wouldn’t go on weekends cos I accept that there will be school age kids there.

I’m just sick of it. I manage to clamber all over the equipment and supervise my toddler despite being heavily pregnant. I don’t understand why it’s so difficult for others to do the same

Yes the older one was supervising the younger one to a point but isnt that a bit unfair in itself?

It was an Inset day here too, maybe a lot of schools had one hence the older children at soft play.
I empathise with you as I was once the Mum of a toddler, horrified by the boisterous older children charging through the baby area..... However you must accept that you chose to let your toddler go in the 'big' side and needed to supervise them accordingly. I wouldn't let my older children rampage in the baby area but not would I supervise them in the same way I would a toddler and would totally consider it OK to leave them for 2 mins while taking a younger sibling to the toilet....... Please relax, you will be there one day!!

In 5 years time my kids will be at school during the week
Apart from inset days, days when school is closed cos the boilers broken, days when schools are on holiday (they may have been visiting from Scotland where schools have already shut) etc etc etc. I'm not even going to start on you judging the mum by her age.

*nor would I

@mysterytoddler

I just mean that the (few) families I know who homeschool the kids have much older parents who have built up money so they can afford to have one parent at home. Also I guess I assumed kids who were being homeschooled would actually, you know, be at home being educated rather than knocking over toddlers

Oh give it a rest.

Yes the older one was supervising the younger one to a point but isnt that a bit unfair in itself?
No thats called raising a family you teach the older ones to help the younger ones and to play together nicely.

You are in the wrong taking your toddler into the big kid section, you have no right to get annoyed. Take your child to the appropriate section!
Also why someone else's child isn't at school is none of your business either.

I'm sorry I think YABU. When I had a little one your DD's age I used to think the same about the boisterous older kids. Now I enjoy my cup of coffee and break on my phone
I have a 3.5 year old and a very nearly 7 year old my older DD looks after and plays with the younger one to a large extent but I do keep one eye out for the younger one.
I would have no qualms about going to the toilet and leaving my eldest for a few minutes but I wouldn't leave younger DD.
I think it was just a case of kids letting off steam at soft play.

The joy of home education is that we don’t have to be stuck indoors next to a desk between the hours of 9-3. Soft play is a great physical activity ( PE), sensory experience for mine ( OT) and socialisation opportunity. Whilst I always remind mine to be mindful of smaller children - I also would be happy to redirect other parents to more age appropriate sections should they be in the older one with tiny children.

Im neither very young < nor Middle Aged > or rich - we homeschool currently as our local authority’s SEN provision was a s**tshow.

My 4.5 and 2.5 year olds roam free in soft play with minimal supervision. I sit have a cupa and relax. They don’t harm others and yet to harm themselves.

Maybe the older ones bubble had burst at school and should have been isolating at home

In 5 years time my kids will be at school during the week
That’s what I thought, but my eldest has ASD and after this year is struggling to attend. Today they had supply and she wouldn’t go. I took her to the local soft play rather than stay cooped up at home.

There may be many reasons a child isn’t in school. Don’t be so judgey just because the mother ‘looks young’ to you. I was ‘young’ when I had my first. But I have a career (in education!). It doesn’t mean that I’m an irresponsible parent.

People homeschool for many reasons. They don’t have to be well-off to do so. And if I were homeschooling mine I would take them to places like soft play in quieter times and do schooling outside of school hours so that I didn’t have to put up with as many other children there. Surely that’s a benefit of homeschooling, it’s flexible.

So the point of soft play is for kids to run around in a safe space.

You took your toddler in the older kids bit where the kids were playing and now you are moaning.

Also late 20’s is a very normal age to have children. “Very very young” is about 15. Are you older OP?

YABU. Nothing worse for kids then having to dodge creaky, slow-moving adults crawling through the tunnels. You shouldn't take little ones in the older kids section if you have to crawl after them like a great lumbering bear (no reflection on your pregnant state, every adult I've ever seen crawling in the soft play looks like a lumbering bear).

It's an age thing , under 3 you have to clamber through the entire thing guarding them from older children. Post 3 you drink coffee and mumsnet. Obviously bad behaviour needs to be dealt with but kids run around soft play it's why they're there. Totally fine to leave the older child whilst nipping to the loo.

I forgot to mention that the area the boys were in was an over 5s area. So the 3 year old (who was the one who knocked over my toddler) shouldn’t have been in there unsupervised.
Your toddler shouldn't have been there either!

This is completely ridiculous. You were in the wrong section to begin with, but if you were supervising your child as closely as you say you were then why didn't you stop the other kid knocking yours over? And now you're being judgemental about homeschooling and 'young' mothers... Have another good look at what you've said.

In the nicest way possible, you sound like a very naive first time parent. In a few years when you're at that soft play centre because you need an opportunity to relax with a coffee knowing your kids are entertaining themselves in a place they can't easily escape from you'll understand

As soon as my child was old enough to remember where I was sitting so they could come and get me if they needed me they were allowed a free run in the soft play. That is the point of it. A break for me and some safe independent play for them. When they were toddlers I supervised more closely and kept them away from busy/boisterous areas.

My youngest is 2 and I have older children too. I think at soft play - the older ones are allowed to run wild, within reason!) and with the younger ones its the job of the parents to mind them and keep them from the older ones.

When your child is older you will see things differently.

I promise you that when your child is 7 you will absolutely not be following them round soft play….

YANBU at all

but first rule of soft play is that you have to stay with your own child until they are old enough to be in a group and defend themselves against feral bullies.

Lazy parents who don't bother with their own children, even when they get stuck or are in tears, are not known to teach them basic respect for anyone let's be honest.

Some older children are lovely, but it only takes 1 or 2 brats to spoil it for everybody else, so you have to stay with yours.

Late twenties with a three and seven year old is hardly 'very young'. Also, what looks like late twenties could easily be mid thirties. I was mistaken for a sixth form student 'babysitting' my 'brother' at a playground. DS was four, I was 26.

The majority of children manage to enjoy themselves without hurting or bullying younger ones, that's the point.

But my toddler was supervised! And yes I’m 40 this year (hence the small age gap between my two) so I realise I may not be very good at guessing ages of women considerably younger than me

If they should have been isolating then that’s even worse!