To think special needs schools need to stay open

[Defeatedbylife]

Im talking about during holidays,summer holidays are coming up and parents like me who are single or home while partners work and have no help in terms of families or friends utterly dread these times.Chilldren attending these schools need routine constantly and most of them arent learning a normal curriculum, instead they are learning basic life skills.
Im.talking from experience.
Ive lost all joy for living,every single day is the same as today,so bloody hard.im a stay at home mum as i have a severly mentally disabled child.he attends a special needs school but the holidays are fast approaching and im filled with utter dread,he makes so much mess ,like smearing food,his feaces,screaming,and its near impossible to go anywhere without someone tutting or complaining at his screaming.i dont blame them. I myself cant bear it.theres no clubs he can attend and family wont have him,every year i have a breakdown and no one knows.in terms of social care help its very minimal,a few hours a week.
Tonight im sitting here contemplating that its better not being here,i have no life,i dont forsee a future with any happiness.im not going to do anything,i know this.

I have an adult daughter with SLD we have gone from full time day college, (ended last year) to 2 days a week due to Covid day service, I am hoping this will increase soon.

OP please contact social care and so you feel you will need to ask for your son to be accommodated. This will kick start them to increasing your direct payment or care package.

It's not the schools responsibility, enough is being dumped on schools, but there should be properly funded and organised respite care.

I'm so sorry you're struggling .

The sen school I teach at joins forces with another local Sen school and run a summer club within the school which is effectively "school but all the fun stuff."

TAs and volunteers sign up and get paid to run it. I think it's funded via the council.

Ask around and find out if there's anything similar locally.

I’m interpreting it differently. I think the suggestion is for the teachers to have the same working conditions with support staff moving to a 12 month contract with annual leave.

@WarriorN

I'm so sorry you're struggling .

The sen school I teach at joins forces with another local Sen school and run a summer club within the school which is effectively "school but all the fun stuff."

TAs and volunteers sign up and get paid to run it. I think it's funded via the council.

Ask around and find out if there's anything similar locally.

A few younger teachers do it too, they like the extra cash and just enjoy it.

The specialist school that I taught at did run a scheme for three weeks of the summer holidays. And some of our brilliant TAs helped run it, so there were people around who knew and understood the individual children.

But it really is a postcode lottery. Our local authority was able to fund it, but many aren't.

I'm so sorry you're struggling with this, OP. I totally understand. I remember parents who relied on the school day to be able to sleep, as they were up all night with their children. I don't know.how they managed.

If you look at stupid things like new national yachts that the government wanted to build you will see that priorities are seriously screwed.

This. It made me so effing angry to read about the stupid national yacht yesterday.

My DD needs 2-1 support and we were finally given some extra Short Breaks funding recently on top of the basic offer, to give us some weekend respite. Can we find anyone to support her? Can we buggery.

I’m interpreting it differently. I think the suggestion is for the teachers to have the same working conditions with support staff moving to a 12 month contract with annual leave
I think there's lots of different suggestions going round.
If the aim is for routine and consistency then that would be school all round.
If the aim is that there's holiday provision ran on the school site, then that's not opening special schools all year.

Intercity225 I understand the residential set up and think that sounds good.

The thing I was find difficult to square was claims that special schools need to be year round for consistency and routine, that it's not about respite and holiday provision because the routines are needed, but then running school as school year round is a logistical headache on so many levels.

If the aim is to have similar holiday provision available to all students who attend special schools as those who attend residential schools, then it isn't a question of open special schools year round for consistency and routine. It's improving holiday provision, which may involve using the school site.

If the aim is to keep the same consistent routine all year, then it can't can't holiday provision and enrichment, it is running a school service year round.

There definitely needs to be more support,my severly autistic non verbal son ,is supposed to have one day a week in the school holidays at a SEN play scheme ,he has had nothing since covid ,his special school was also closed during the lockdowns ( so much for vulnerable children being able to attend school 🙄)

Then you get loads of things that claim to be inclusive but don’t actually have a clue in practise
Oh yes. So much this.
My DS is also bright, currently in a PRU, he isn't impaired enough for a special needs club (planting seeds, baking cakes and using trikes on repeat, he'd be bored rigid. He's already wondering why he can do more advanced work than his older small-group partner) but can't cope with a regular club without lots of additional support. We went to a supposedly inclusive sports club last night. The helper who met us on the door said after 3 minutes "he's not going to be able to go in, is he" and then followed him down the road when he ran off (he didn't run far, he was fine) then I said "it's probably better if you go back in" and she said "no I'm fine here" and she did not even begin to understand that I meant FOR HIM.
Once she'd gone back in he went and watched for 10 minutes which was the goal I'd set him for the day but if she thinks he's going to run straight in and take part on his first day there she is completely clueless.
He went to a short break day and was quite happy running around the grounds and playing on his own (the other children there were all girls and all much more coordinated than him - he has DCD). They rang us after 2 hours and said "he isn't joining in". Frankly, if he's there, not hurting anyone, and seems happy, that's all you are going to get, have you never met a child with SEN before? Are they all supposed to stay in their bedrooms if they can't dash straight in and join in the moment they get somewhere?

If people are wanting the consistency and no break in routine, then how do staff have their holidays,

We wouldn't want this for DS but if you have 3 teachers for every 2 spaces, then the children have 2 of those 3 teachers in school every day, and each teacher/TA takes their holidays at staggered times.
I bet SEN teachers would be happy to have some of their holidays in term time!

How old is dc?
Go to gp say everything ask them to write to social services
Social services can get you more help
If you suicidal theg can arrange short term Foster care.
There are 52 week school placements

drspouse
I've seen a lot of that lip service provision and one size fits all that makes a lot of generalisations about what pupils with SEN need.

The issue with the 3 teachers for 2 spaces and stagger their holidays is that that would only work if the expectation is for school provision to run year round (which has its own issues for any children who don't use year round provision). The cost factor also comes into play as holiday provision generally isn't done by postgraduate qualified people with the associated cost.

It's why I think the issue of holiday provision is more complex than simply open the schools and give SEN staff annual leave like other jobs.

In my opinion needs to be a much bigger discussion about the range of needs that some children and families have, the nature of education, wrap around and holiday support, respite breaks, family support, how school buildings could be used outside of term time and so on. Anything other than a full review of provision will inevitably lead to extras being expected of schools, usually without sufficient funding, and the impact will be felt by staff, students and families.

In my experience it's a case of he/she who shouts loudest who get more help and support. Children's Social Care budgets are limited and Social workers have to act as gatekeepers to the budget. I have known families ask for help and be turned down but those who succeed are those who persist and know the right case to put forward. I think feeling the way you do is serious and needs to be conveyed to your/your child's Social worker.
It would cost them a lot more to have to take your child into residential care if you could no longer cope than it would to give you some extra hours respite from home by direct payments.

@Embracelife

How old is dc? Go to gp say everything ask them to write to social services Social services can get you more help If you suicidal theg can arrange short term Foster care. There are 52 week school placements

Have you any idea how hard it is to get any respite?I have a group of friends we are all parents of disabled children,one friend was on her knees she was offered 1 hr respite a week .

@bigbluebus

In my experience it's a case of he/she who shouts loudest who get more help and support. Children's Social Care budgets are limited and Social workers have to act as gatekeepers to the budget. I have known families ask for help and be turned down but those who succeed are those who persist and know the right case to put forward. I think feeling the way you do is serious and needs to be conveyed to your/your child's Social worker. It would cost them a lot more to have to take your child into residential care if you could no longer cope than it would to give you some extra hours respite from home by direct payments.

This is so true!

YANBU at all. Just had my twins EHCP review and the school were stunned that social care are giving us 1 hour a week to accrue for babysitting, and 8 hours a week in holidays - not respite but assistance for someone to help take them out. No actual respite. It’s awful.

There are no holiday clubs they can access at all. Nothing.

Sorry to hear this, but there should be respite care available from your local authority. If not, then I have no suggestions. X

It was the shit that nearly pushed me over the edge... and my mate with hers.

@bigbluebus

In my experience it's a case of he/she who shouts loudest who get more help and support. Children's Social Care budgets are limited and Social workers have to act as gatekeepers to the budget. I have known families ask for help and be turned down but those who succeed are those who persist and know the right case to put forward. I think feeling the way you do is serious and needs to be conveyed to your/your child's Social worker. It would cost them a lot more to have to take your child into residential care if you could no longer cope than it would to give you some extra hours respite from home by direct payments.

This.

Op do you have an advocate eg local parent partnership? Are you kn your own or with his dad?
What respite do you get now?
Do you want him to go elsewhere fir respite breaks or hzve carer hours at home?
Hzve you considered residential school placement some do 52 week per year?
Having energy to spend time with him when you can and a structured safe place where he can grow can be considered tell sd you looking at full time residential school placement
Since a this might be good for him and longer term could be best for both of you
And b
Is expensive so they will first look to get you more support locally
You need to tell gp and social services how you are exhausted and on verge of mh crisis
And that your dc needs the support for him

I am always minded of the song in West Side Story "Gee, Officer Krupke" when it comes to special needs provision - whatever agency you go to they will always think somebody else is responsible and should be picking up the tab.

How old us your dc and which area?
Eg www.priorscourt.org.uk/
Is fantastic and clearly people do get funding for their dc to go there

Give contact a call, they can help you request a carers assessment. This is statutory. Also you're entitled to short break provision, if it isnt offered direct payments but as others have said finding PA's can be difficult.

You could raise lack of social care at Annual Review and say you don't know how this would effect the educational elements of the plan if thasn't been fully assessed. There is something in the code of practise specifically on complaints around this. Also you could appeal on the health/social care trial.

I'm guessing you're too shattered for any of that tho. For us if we stay in it makes things worse so we get out as much as possible.

I'm not sure on the age interests of your child but here's some of the things we do with out 11 year old who also gets the looks and tuts etc.

Autism friendly cinema screenings: not just for people with autism but a better more sensory friendly environment for those with learning disabilities and sensory needs also. Vue are doing Hey Duggee this Sunday. You can apply for a cea card (around £5 and you need to show proof of disability) which will allow a free carer for a year although may not be in time for Sunday but I think tickets for hey duggee are around £3. Odeon are doing a diff film but I cant remember what itwas as it wasn't suitable for us.

If your near Manchester have a look at CAFT.

Merlin pass, quite a big initial outlay but you can get 1 or 2 free carers passes with proof (paed letter for 2 carers) and you can get a RAP card so you don't have to do the big queues. We use some of my sons short break budget for this (if you do get assessed). Thorpe park, alton towers, lego land, madame tussauds, shrek, london eye, sealife centres ..... some if the lego discovery centres and sealife do relaxed mornings. Other theme parks do discounts etc (I think paultons is only free entry for wheelchair users).

You can apply to Merlin's magic wand for a free tickets for your family too.

Theatre shows do discounted tickets/ free carers and good seating. Some also do relaxed performances like lion king and beauty and the beast.

Many of the museums do relaxed mornings for kids with disabilities. If you're around or in driving distance to Halifax, Eureka do access all areas sessions (they were cancelled due to covid so not sure when they will start again) these are free with free parking for kids with sen. If you go not on the sessions you can ask (in advance) for an extra pair of hands and they get a member of staff just to help you. They have a sensory room too.

We also find gojng early or late to places where we know it'll be busy helps as it reduces the number of people that do look and make comment. You could also see if your local carers forum has sessions fir parents to chat n meet up.

Local carers forum yes
Other parents can say where and what they access
I found out eg nearly NAS school did overnight respite thru another parent this he started age 10 was fantastic hexwent fir up to seven nights at a time in school holidays

I feel like anyone voting YABU are people whose children do not need this intensive, specialist support so please take it with a pinch of salt

No, as I pointed out quite early in this thread, people vote on what the title is, and what is in the opening post. Most people (including the OP, now she has clarified) don't think the school staff should just be expected to continue through the holidays, and that has split the vote.

Virtually everyone who even has a small concept of what it is like would agree "there should be provision" but that is different from "the school should stay open".

Defeatedbylife has clarified that wasn't what she intended to say, in her post today, but obviously the overwhelming majority of votes were cast before she came back and said that.