To think “Gently,....” is weird stage directiony English?

[RickiTarr]

If you want to say something gently, say it gently,

You don’t have to preface a gentle comment with “Gently,...” if it’s genuinely gentle, and you don’t make a tactless comment by sticking “gently...” in front of it.

Why is this suddenly a thing?! I’m not seeing “Comedically, you should hit him in the head with a melon.” Or “Heartlessly, you should just get a grip and take in ironing.” So what’s this “Gently,.....” nonsense all about?

AIBU to think it IS nonsense?

I cannot be the only poster who has noticed this.

Can you give an example in a sentence, of what you mean?

I’ve not come across this I think. Is it a mn thing ?

I don't think I've seen that exact construction. But it might as well be a warning that the next few words are going to be the most breathtakingly insulting thing you've ever read. Sometimes people need to hear it. Sometimes the writer is just a bastard.

Not something I've noticed!

Do you mean in conversation or written down, like here on the forums?

I find sometimes tone can be lost in text so sometimes notes like that can be helpful, if your worried what you're typing could be taken differently.

Face to face it sounds like when people start with "I'm not being rude..." before being rude!

I’ve seen ‘’seriously’ which is sometimes useful to signpost after jocular bit. Also ‘honestly’ - which I always think is redundant.
Gently could be a useful preface shorthand to soften a bit of tough advice ?

I’m trying not to TAAT. I’ll go and grab an example from another thread and change it a bit.

I’ve never seen it anywhere other than Mumsnet.

Are you sure you're not singling out one specific poster here?

I have no idea what you mean!

@BIWI

Are you sure you're not singling out one specific poster here?

No, now you’ve got me intrigued.

I wish it was that contained.

I think it’s because tone is hard to convey in text. People use it when saying something that could be interpreted as critical or hostile, but is actually intended to be firm but fair.

I think it’s fine to use it on a forum - online fora often have their own conventions and rules when it comes to grammar and language.

It's getting more use in here recently. I believe it's when poster wnats to appear nice.
"In the gentlest way, OP, you...."
"I mean this gently, OP, but..."
And kind of like be kind it isoften not followed by anything gentle.

I only see this in work emails....
Dear Galloping, a gentle reminder to....

It annoys me a lot. Don't be so simpering!
If you are waiting for me to do something- just tell me!

Gently, I think you may be overreacting a bit.

It’s because it’s written down and you can’t hear my tone. There’s a big difference with the above sentence if you remove the gently and imagine it being said in a brusque manner.

It’s like the sort of tone I take with my sister if I’m saying something for her own good which she might not want to hear but it comes from a place of love. It clarifies that the message is meant to be supportive.

maybe it just to stop that misunderstanding that electronic communication can bring?

And I don't think it's a specific poster. It's getting used by few. This is how language fashion starts. Like Hollyoaks made half a people do "You was"🙈

If you're seeing it online then it makes sense, it would be unnnatural to spoken english but online tone indicators are a useful addition because it can be so easy for something to come across wrong or be misinterpreted.

@00100001

maybe it just to stop that misunderstanding that electronic communication can bring?

I thought that was what emojis were for?

@GallopingGreen

I only see this in work emails.... Dear Galloping, a gentle reminder to....

It annoys me a lot. Don't be so simpering!
If you are waiting for me to do something- just tell me!

Yes like that, but evolved one step further to literally “Gently, You are being a horse faced prat.....”

You’ve perfectly described why it’s irritating.

I've noticed it a couple of times

Some people use 'gently' and some people use flower emojis.

Either way, they're just trying to get across that they're not being a dick.

dollywilde oh the dreaded ‘place of love’! My sister and I sometimes approach each other from there - doesn’t always work! 😂

@HonestlyFuckThis

I think it’s because tone is hard to convey in text. People use it when saying something that could be interpreted as critical or hostile, but is actually intended to be firm but fair.

I think it’s fine to use it on a forum - online fora often have their own conventions and rules when it comes to grammar and language.

But where did it suddenly COME FROM?

TBF “Poor you” gives me the rage too, and it’s obviously meant well in context, but it looks so patronising written down. So maybe I’m not the best arbiter.

The real life equivalent is that you can say anything you like to a small child as long as you put 'darling' on the end.

I get gentle reminders from my dentist!