To hate people commenting on my skin

[meanwhilebacktobasics]

I am so fed up of this. I have really pale skin with freckles but if I am warm or a bit stressed I flush red...very red. Every time without fail that Ihave gone to work with no redness corrective make up on ( I'd really like to not have to wear it constantly) people comment...I've had ooh have you run a marathon/ why are you so rosy/ you look tanned/ what's wrong with your face etc. Every single time. I try to laugh it off and say " oh I'm just warm" but I hate it. I felt my race flush last week and prayed nobody would comment but ...they did!! I'm quite shy and it just makes it worse. Do I just resign myself to makeup or is there anything I could say back???

I have the same problem, I have never worn make up so people get to know that this is what I look like so it doesn’t happen so often now. I tend to say “my skin is just like this, it’s pretty annoying”, which I think calls attention to the fact that it’s not particularly helpful to point it out. Occasionally I might add a sarcastic “thanks for pointing it out” at the end. I do find it rude, I don’t think they would be telling me I had acne or some other skin issue, but this one seems fair game.

I used to have this, or at least I still have the pale skin but the blushing has massively reduced.
I still look like I've done a workout when I'm leaving a shopping center and on any good weather days in the summer.
Part of overcoming it for me was that my skin doesn't react well to makeup so I have to choose between foundation/green corrector for more than two days in a row or a painful rash.
I chose less pain and only really wear makeup for going out now and important things in work a presentation or interview as I will definitely blush then.
When I realised I would have to stop the makeup and just brazen it out I just said "no I'm just hot/blushing" when it was commented on in a level voice. It was very hard to begin with and I would blush even more. Red down my neck etc. but repetition took the sting out of it and people start to embarrass themselves if they are trying to make a big deal of something your treating as normal.
It's like the teenage "Yeah, Whatever" response.
I can still blush for no reason when talking in a meeting that I've spoken in a hundred times before but I just keep going and none of my managers have time to comment or tolerate someone else commenting on it.
Best of luck with it and don't expect immediate confidence from yourself it was a good two years before I genuinely was as unbothered as I sounded when I responded "I'm just blushing".
Fake it till you make it

Not my face but I have a constant red chest all year round, people often say "oh you've caught the sun" "wow does that hurt" " why are you so red" on and on, some rude some curious, all unwelcome! I don't comment on peoples bodies at all but some people can't help but ask i guess.

I got used to it and just say "nope not burnt always red no idea why it is what it is and its annoying when people ask actually " usually met with "oh so sorry just wondered "

People can be so silly, and it comes across as ignorant and rude . Just point out " it's my English/ Scottish/ Irish heritage " followed up with , " does that answer your question?"

I had this since childhood - v embarrassing at times - it had eased off in my 30s but now have full-on flushing rosacea. Haven’t had too many comments even in the teen years- must be lucky and know/work with polite people! Like a PP I’ve always just said something like ‘yes, my skin does this’.

Saw a thread recently where the OP had acne, couldn’t get a dermatology referral from the NHS, and was fed up with people ‘helpfully’ suggesting things she could do!

I hear you, OP.

I've had ooh have you run a marathon/ why are you so rosy/ you look tanned/ what's wrong with your face etc

I get the first two. I go bright red after exercise even though I’m fit, and it lasts ages. Plus my skin flushes when I’m stressed too.

If anyone points it out, usually at work, I either say, yes, I have run a marathon during lunchtime, how clever of you to spot it! Or, I’ll say yes, I am rosy because I find you incredibly attractive and the heart wants what the heart wants. Or I just go for, “what’s it to you?” if I don’t want to waste humour on them.

It’s so annoying. I get it too. No one would ever comments on my weight to my face (I’m largely overweight) but my skin appears to be fair game. I reply with “I have a skin condition, it’s actually really painful” those I’ve used that on have never commented again!

I get this. My face and upper body flash Bright red in the most innocent of circumstances. Slightly increased temperature outside. One glass of wine. Walked a bit fast. Nervous about a meeting I'm about to have. It's often quite spectacular and very patchy. It's commented on constantly and it makes it worse when someone mentions it.

I just blame my Irish complexion and just try to change the conversation

Just remembered, I have also used, “scarlet fever mate. Stand well back.”

I got this when I was younger. I had to deliver the post to another section at work where the department loud mouth sat. Being very shy and self-conscious didn't help. I tried to be nonchalant but it didn't work. 'Big mouth' noticed, came to my desk and said loudly, "Every time you bring the post round you blush!" (So why don't you shut up about it I thought). The green anti-flush foundation was of some help. If I'd been braver I'd have said, "You've got a bit mouth!" but I never did.

I dont get comments as an adult but did constantly as a child.

I am exceptionally pale, with blue/silver undertones and I dont 'flush' or have freckles/moles (my mam has freckles and flushes though).

I spent my childhood constantly being asked if I was sick and got sent home loads from school for 'looking ill', I even had adult ask if I was dying or terminal... nope just really white and pasty.

I didnt 'get it' until we went on holiday and I saw my DS in line with the other kids at the swimming pool. It really hit home how increadibly white we really are in comparison to others, it was like we where some other completely different race lol.

I guess at least if you flush red you dont constantly look like a corpse like we do.

I dont mind though, Im a living snow white and embrace that and never had any urge to tan or change it or feel embarrased.

I have a red strip across my cheek and cheekbone all the way to my hair line.
People are constantly commenting how I've caught the sun 🤦‍♀️

I have this and it's awful - I go bright red when talking to strangers, friends, family, at work, after exercise, when it's very hot or very cold, and don't even get me started on job interviews. I constantly worry that people see me as some sort of freak for blushing in the most innocent of circumstances. It has completely destroyed my confidence and now I avoid social situations if at all possible, despite wishing I could make friends. I can honestly say that it has ruined my life. I hate it

I have this; second nature now to have makeup on but I hate that I have to. I get the rage though when I think about all the times adults went on about it when I was a child. Did people have 0 clue that may have been embarrassing?!

I just wanted to say I flush terribly too when hot/ embarrassed or drinking alcohol. Sometimes it just happens when I am talking to someone and I’m none of those things. If it’s really bad I can also go blotchy down the top of my arms too.

I know that doesn’t help, but I genuinely understand how this makes you feel.

I tend to be quite cutting if someone says something, eg: I am aware of that, and I don’t need you to point it out. Are you always do forthright & comment on other peoples appearances? Or simply, well, that’s not very nice is it.

Equally I have in my 40s come to terms with it a bit. If I am doing a presentation I wear higher tops for example, but generally just go, to closer friends oh here I fo again, all blotchy

I get comments like this and depending on who has been rude enough to mention it i do a variation on a puzzled look and a 'oh right... i dont really pay much attention to what my skin's doing to be honest' and then change the subject. It does the trick because its a complete non response that embarasses people without being rude.

I was also bullied for it at school which I think made me even more anxious about it.

Thank you all, so it's not just me!! I'd never dream of commenting on anybodys appearance unless it was a compliment. These people are actually okay, so I'm sure it's not malicious, just insensitive.
My ex used to say vile things to me and then say " ooh look, I've hit a nerve, look you've gone red"
( but that's another thread I had...).

I have palmar erythema - my palms are always scarlet . I'm totally over people exclaiming " OH DEAR !! You've burned your HANDS !!" and then I have to explain that this is a medical condition which I've had for 40 years, no my hands are not hot, no they don't hurt . Nothing I can do about it but be philosophical - it could be worse .

@Houseofvelour

I have a red strip across my cheek and cheekbone all the way to my hair line. People are constantly commenting how I've caught the sun 🤦‍♀️

@Houseofvelour Do you have rosacea? I hate how people feel that commenting is acceptable. I also feel extremely frustrated that most people with facial flushing/rashes get so little medical treatment or even just compassion from GPs!

I go bright red with exercise no matter how fit I am, and blush very easily including when I lie.
It's a pain in the arse ( especially when I'm trying to lie ) but I'm used to it. People don't comment often, but I tend to laugh and not let it bother me too much.

I’m deathly pale, I constantly look really ill or close to death. I’ve been kept in hospital more than once because they thought I was anaemic.
I’ve stopped wearing make up and the number of people commenting is insane! I stopped trying to make funny retorts and just say this is my face 🤷🏻‍♀️ Like you I would never comment on someone’s appearance but others don’t seem to have an issue being rude.
I look orange wearing tan and I don’t really like it. I’m pale, get over it!!

Rosy cheeks and blushing have been the bane of my life. It has seriously impacted me and my confidence.

Why people feel they have the right to comment on it so blatantly is beyond me. They usually do it to embarrass you further.

I’m in my late 40s and I’m afraid it hasn’t got better - I get the flushing on my neck now too. I wear high neck tops to work now. My colleagues must notice but thankfully have never said anything and weirdly my DH loves my rosy cheeks.

Sorry OP, no advice but I can sympathise- if I ever met you I most certainly wouldn’t mention it!!

Same here!
Use the stock mumsnet answer -"Did you mean to be so rude?"
I'd never comment on anybodies skin etc the way some people do. Hiw dare they think its ok to do that!
Yes I know I'm flushed/ hot etc. Funnily enough it's my body and I don't need someone else pointing it out!

I have this problem too but on my chest. It’s from sun damage in the past and it’s just really sensitive to any heat etc. People always say “ohh you’ve caught the sun!” Or be careful you need some sunscreen.” Or “Ohh your quite red there!”
AARGH!!!! I feel quite self conscious about it and HATE people bringing it up I used to be polite about it but now I just say - actually it’s red because of past skin damage abs it’s always red... is there any other bit of my body you would like to comment on??

The only other option is to cover up but I dont see why I should do that just because some people are rude enough to comment on my skin.