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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want covid vaccine even though bf says I cant

318 replies

Trumanshow · 18/06/2021 22:47

So my bf lives with his mum who is pretty old. Apparently her dr has said she shouldn't have the covid vaccine as it's not safe and no one who has had it can come into contact with her for 10 days. So my bf says Im not allowed to have it done. As far as I know the vaccine can't shed and if his mum is old (80s but otherwise healthy) she will be fine having the jab herself! She believes crystals heal....

I'm pretty well educated and they are starting to make me doubt myself, Im booked to have first dose tomorrow (my hometown has had a massive surge in cases) but I'm scared of the fallout if I do. AIBU just to go have it done even though he says I cant?

OP posts:
itsgettingwierd · 19/06/2021 21:32

Sorry cross posted.

Well done taking control. It won't feel like it right now but today 2 good things have happened for your future Thanks

goose1964 · 19/06/2021 21:42

I voted yabu, but that was because you were listening to your boyfriend who should have no say in your health decisions. A bit of research shows that severe allergy to ingredients in the vaccines seems to be the only reason not to have one.

Looubylou · 19/06/2021 21:44

Please let this be your eye opener. I would tell them I'd had it to have 10 days away. I'm hoping in that time you will realise they are batshit crazy and trying to control you, and then break free permanently.

Looubylou · 19/06/2021 21:48

Just read up thread bravo OP!! You rock 👏

GettingItOutThere · 19/06/2021 22:05

he lives at home at 43?, listens to his mother? fucking run. This will end badly.

Get the jab, don't see them for 10 days, then never see them for another 10 after that etc,
end it.

NotTheCatsWhiskers · 19/06/2021 22:12

I've also broke up with him.

This is the best thing you’ve posted!

Keep strong! Keep posting every time you have a wobble.

RaginaFalangi · 19/06/2021 22:53

@LibrariesGiveUsPower45321

Your BF has no say in your health. Your body your rules.

No NHS doctor would say that. Either your BF or his mum or both are cuckoo.

This^
Newestname001 · 19/06/2021 23:12

Very well done @Trumanshow!!

You've taken control of your own decisions and your own life.

Your future will be so much calmer without these two odd, manipulative people in it. Onwards and upwards. 🌹

mathanxiety · 19/06/2021 23:14

@Trumanshow, well done for breaking up with him.

You now need to block him on all social media, and also on your phone.

He will try to reel you back in. You must not allow him to do that.

You are going to have to get very tough and steely, and not give in.

He will try charm and then he will try abusive tactics, and then he will create some sort of crisis to get you to pay attention again. He will also get friends and his family to try to get to you on his behalf.

Ignore it all.

Skysblue · 19/06/2021 23:30

Thenword that jumps out at me here is “allowed”. No one and especially not your boyfriend gets to tell you what medical decisions you make.

Your boyfriend and his mum are mentally not quite right. They’re also pretty stupid, I know that’s harsh but obviously it would be much worse for you to catch (and pass on) covid than the vaccine which does NOT shed.

Have the vaccine and then have a think about if you want to be with this guy who tells you what he ‘allows’ you to do.

FlowerArranger · 20/06/2021 00:43

I have zero self esteem...

This book may help: THE SIX PILLARS OF SELF ESTEEM, by Nathaniel Branden.

MrsTerryPratchett · 20/06/2021 02:03

Well done OP. You're on the road to a better life.

FaceyRomford · 20/06/2021 02:27

Have the jab. Get a new bloke. Job done.

larkstar · 20/06/2021 02:54

@Trumanshow well done - initiating a break-up, even if it's the absolute right thing to do can be really hard emotionally (and practically) - my daughter broke up with her bf of about 3 years and it's taken her a good year to yet over it - she was worried sick about it because she knew he would be upset - he is actually a lovely guy TBH but he hasn't any traction in life after leaving uni and it being bailed out all the time by his doting parents (they are lovely ppl too) - and he just wasn't seeing how this was getting my DD down - she wanted to share her life with another adult - not a child - she now has a new bf who is a lot more insightful and grown up.

As someone else said - just make sure this decision sticks - even if it's difficult and upsetting right now.

HelgaDownUnder · 20/06/2021 03:22

They sound batshit. The advice to not be with anyone who's had it, that is not medical, it's woo.

How would your bf know you were vaccinated anyway, if you didn't tell him?

Classicbrunette · 20/06/2021 03:27

Well done ! In the near future you’ll see how mumsnet saved your sanity and your life !!

QueenBee52 · 20/06/2021 03:36

Best update !!!

brilliant news 🎉🥂

RantyAnty · 20/06/2021 05:06

Well done on getting rid of this anchor.

Glad you got the vaccine. I've got some thick as pig shit anti vax relatives so I understand the frustration.

CupoTeap · 20/06/2021 05:39

Op good for you, 2 steps to your future health!!!!

NeedNewKnees · 20/06/2021 05:55

Welcome to your new life - vaccinated and free of a controlling man-baby! Flowers

ShowGirlCoaching · 20/06/2021 06:14

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

AnyFucker · 20/06/2021 09:26

Thank fuck for that.

HeartvsBrain · 20/06/2021 10:44

Ah Trumanshow, Congratulations, I am so happy for you, as you can now have a wonderful future ahead of you, instead of a life of misery. I am 100% certain that you have made the correct choice, and I hardly ever feel sure enough about anything to say 100%, but in this case I am. Of course you will feel sad, confused, maybe overwhelmed for a while, but please don't ever let those feelings get the better of you. I do hope that you have rl loved ones who will support you, but whether or not you do, please come back here for support as many times as you want or need to, and to let us know how you are doing. Also, do please think about having some counselling, your last 2 choices were brilliant - to have the jab, and especially to break up with him, and I hope that in making those decisions it has already raised your belief in your own self worth at least a little. But you should be absolutely full of self-confidence and self-worth, because you are a amazing human being, and I just think that the right type of counselling may help you get there a little quicker, and a little more easily! 💐💐💐💐💐 for you!

Orchidflower1 · 20/06/2021 22:13

🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

For having it done and

🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳
For ditching the man child.

You are worthy or so much more.
You had courage.
You acted on this courage.

I’m proud of you and I’m an internet random woman- be proud of yourself. X

Orchidflower1 · 20/06/2021 22:14

Sorry @Trumanshow that should say of not or typo 🤪

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