To be over having to give up EVERYTHING due to perimenopause

[Edenspirits]

• Can’t tolerate alcohol anymore- even a couple of drinks give me a massive hangover
• Bread makes me massively bloated and I have to really watch what I eat as I get piled really easily 🙄
• Chocolate gives me a headache
• Tea gives me a massive headache
• have to watch everything I eat as the slightest deviation and I put on half a stone by barely looking
• the slightest deviation to my routine and I don’t sleep 😴

I feel like I barely recognise my own body!

Sigh- it’s SO dull!
Aibu to be really really really over perimenopause! Waiting for HRT from the doc and ready hope it helps!

BP up again. Really worried I'm going to have to go on yet more meds to bring it down, so I can take HRT.
The GP suggested I up my dose of ADs to decrease my stress levels but I don't want to do that, I want my life to be less stressful.

@toffeebutterpopcorn

Are there any good books on the subject? The symptoms seem to be varied and it’s just not fair!

I've just started reading 'The XX Brain' by Dr Lisa Mosconi. It's actually about understanding the link between women's brains and the increased risk of dementia, but this essentially seems to be due to hormones. So far, it's making me quite cross that women have such a shit time and yet there's been so little research because, well basically we're not men

There is a lot of information about hormonal changes esp around menopause. Later in the book there are sections on sleep, HRT, stress etc... It does seem quite indepth and may have some suggestions of use to some.

It is crap.
HRT has helped a bit. But it's still crap, all the food that affects us more, and putting on weight etc.

Re books: Started the XX brain and there's one with practical info on diet etc ... I think it's the 'happy menopause ' but will check.

Those that have gone through the menopause - did the symptoms go once your periods had totally stopped (am I right in thinking once you haven’t had a period in a year then you have gone through the menopause)

Sending love to everyone going through this

YY to all this.

I had to come off my HRT on the advice of 2 Consultants - v scary side effects. Now on fluoxetine to try and manage the horrific anxiety. In a terrible state because I’ve had some bleeding after sex and between periods again. Waiting to be referred back to gynae, waking up panicking at stupid o’clock, generally feeling shit.

HRT changed my life! However, I'm still permanently exhausted and I think I'm really starting to look and feel my age.

Wait for the menopause and then find you can’t take HRT

Itching, itching, itching
Anxiety
Crap sleep
Itchy eyes
Shrivelled bits
Pubes disappear
Weight gain

I feel like I've found my people!
I'm 45 & have most of these symptoms mentioned, weight gain, nearly 3 stone in 2 years (though my diet is a part if that) depressed, moody,. anxious,
sleep is awful, fatigue & brian fog. No night sweats or hot flushes, but I am constantly hot, to the point I feel like my insides are cooking. I am still having my period, but the last one lasted almost 2 wks longer. I have a telephone appt with a Dr next week to see if they will test my blood.
The only thing is I am on sleeping tablets, AD's and a migraine tablet, I get botox for my migraines, and B12 injections as I don't absorb it through food, so most of my symptoms can be put down to my depression etc. So I don't know if the Dr will do any tests.
My arms feel weaker, I bruise a lot more, eyesight is not as good. So I feel something is going on.
I could continue with most of these symptoms as I've had them for years, but definitely seen as increase in them, but feeling hot all the time is a killer, having to shower when I come back from the shops etc. I hate it. They seem to have all got worse since I had a breakdown 2 years ago. I was suicidal,.came from no where and I was in a psychiatric hospital for 3months.
So my symptoms could be anything, but I need something done.
Does anyone have depression, but also perimenopause?

It’s enough to cause depression in anyone...

I have had severe anxiety since the menopause if that’s any help? Just ridiculous levels. I’ve had to take ill health retirement because of it.

Im

@TooTiredForToday

This is so hard to read. Some of you sound so miserable.

I've spent my whole 30s pregnant or with small children and still in that phase. I had sort of been looking forward to my 40s as a chance to return to work, get the kids to school, rebuild friendships and my marriage, and also maybe be fit and look good, after the decade of everything being about babies. The thought of having to deal with peri instead is utterly shit.

I hope everyone on the thread can get the medical help they need and that unsympathetic GPs are being educated. Slowly I think that will take a long time...

Not everyone has all, or even many, of these symptoms. I really don't think I had anything during my forties that I would say was menopause related, apart from maybe after 45 finding I could no longer eat whatever I want without putting on a few pounds.

@nyprincess, when did you start suffering from depression?

Yes, of course it is possible to have both conditions, but doctors have been writing hormone imbalances and deficiencies in women off as 'depression' since forever. Or occasionally 'hysteria' or 'bad nerves.' 'Bad nerves' was a big one when I was a child. Looking back, it was probably bad marriages, enforced domesticity, and menopause.

Well this is quite depressing but also really interesting for me because I didn’t know about Peri! Thank you for sharing your stories. I better do some reading.

It’s amazing how little we are taught about our own female bodies isnt it? And amazing how little doctors/society gives a fuck aboit women.

On top of all this shit the old man's testosterone levels drop they get cranky, erectile dysfunction, brain fog, prostate bladder problems.

Peri can fuck off and then fuck off to the far side of fuck

Diagnosed long covid in January due to weird set of symptoms but kept adding to the list and gp decided on balance may be peri instead. Im 42 and had ablation 5 years ago so haven't bled since

Symptoms include
Fatigue
Weight gain
Joint pain
Night sweats
Food allergies giving horrendous melisma on my back (alcohol, tomatoes and spinach)
Tearing like paper cuts after penetrative sex
Brain fog and rage
Pressure in sinus on waking
Urinary urgency
Dry skin that feels sunburnt on my face
Teeth grinding (to the point that I need a mouthguard)

Started estrogel and utrogestan last week and desperately hoping it works. At the moment I will settle for removing half the symptoms just to make life feel tolerable

I've suffered from depression for most of my adult life, but since 2006 it has mostly been stable until 2019 when I had the breakdown from nowhere. That was a scary time,and I think it would be easy to slip back down that slope.

@espressomartiniftw

HRT has been life changing for me. I have a mirena so just needed the oestrogen gel. It's amazing!

Me too. I felt like you OP until I went on HRT. I cannot recommend it enough and if you don't have medical contraindications that make HRT a risk I wholeheartedly recommend you talk to your doctor ASAP!

@Howdidigetsoold

Those that have gone through the menopause - did the symptoms go once your periods had totally stopped (am I right in thinking once you haven’t had a period in a year then you have gone through the menopause)

Sending love to everyone going through this

No, I didn't have that many symptoms till my periods were gone really. I still have an implant which meant I hardly had any anyway.

Id like to give some hope to you all. I had 3_4 years of hell, unfortunately still have anxiety but eventually, the other things do pass. It just feels like forever. I never had HRT but that was due to medical reasons. I honestly thought I was going mad. Im in a better place now, just still dealing with anxiety, which the Pandemic didn't help at all. You will feel better. Re alcohol, I think as you get older you don't tolerate it as well either.

I'm 47 and a cranky bloated hormonal mess, my eyesight has gone to shit, the thudding anxiety in my chest, the sweats, the joint pain, the never ending pmt and periods that show up late or early last for 10 day or 2 days with out rhyme or reason, and the flooding and clots that slither out at inopportune moments causing you to speed waddle for the loo, the brain fog, I honestly feel like I have early onset dementia at times. Oh and the dryness why does no-one mention the dryness, I thought I had constant thrush, sitting down hurt, walking hurt, and I spent so much on Canestan thinking it was out of control thrush but never really got much relief, then saw something about atrophy and lightbulb went off and found recommendations for Balance Activ products and the cream and pessaries have literally changed my life.

So far am ok at 50, not even sure I am peri yet?

Like the poster a few pages back, I am still on the pill and am able to continue being in it as long as my weight/blood pressure/heart rate are good

I guess this means I may simply not know when I hit menopause.

Reading this thread, I think that may not be a bad thing

I do wonder at what age I’ll be forced to stop

I got the Vogel menopause support pills recently and my mood does seem to have stabilised. Don't fancy HRT at all, so aiming to sort it with diet, exercise etc (relucatantly). Have heard kelp can help with hormonal weight gain, too, so going to try that for my increasingly Pooh Bear shaped self.

@AutomaticMoon

I've had this since I was 29, I'm 38 now. It started after I had to have a termination due to tokophobia. I think it's a punishment from my body because I didn't procreate? Very bad soaking freezing night sweats, have to wake up to pee often (I think the sweats are like autonomic dysreflexia) boobs swell randomly & painful, hair on sides of legs gone/bald outer legs, but ugly dark hair on nipples started to grow. Memory awful, could be from the chronic sleep deprivation. Just a month ago I started taking Trazodone which I discovered by myself on YouTube out of all places. This makes me sleep finally, I don't know how I survived. Ovestin cream helps with the bladder pain, apparently good bacteria in the vagina & bladder are dependant on the presence of estrogen, this is why women with low estrogen get many UTIs.

Thank you for the uti info. I've had some really bad ones recently (almost hospitalised) but drs couldn't find anything wrong. When looking at menopause symptoms I had read recurrant utis but I didn't know why. Am hopeful I'd it's just low estrogen it can be fixed,

HRT since I was 51. So been on it for years now. It stopped all the symptoms in under a month. I'm the same person every day of the year now. No sweats, no perceptible ageing either . Skin, hair, weight the same. Had a Dexa scan and all ok with my bone density. The main reason I pushed the GP to go on HRT was that my mum and older sister both have osteoporosis. It has been horrible to see my sister age so quickly over the past ten years and I'm determined not to let it happen to me. I take Bioglan blood pressure tablets from Holland and Barrett to help keep my blood pressure low and magnesium also.