... to expect mums at dd's school not to be filled with hate for me because i have to give a witness statement after one of them hit a pregnant ladies car head on after having a couple of drinks b4 the school run!!

[alittleone2]

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I woul be a bit careful about what you say about the breath test . She may have failed the road side one but when taken to the station , as she would have been arrested did she fail that one ? The test at the station is the one that counts .

Be sure of all the facts before before yo say anything in the playground .

Can only assume that they would be happy if nobody stuck up for them if they needed it. There should be more people like you alittleone2 and you shoul be proud of yourself. Well done. Just ignore them.

so what if they are 'filled with hate' ? I take it you dont associate with them anyway? Let them whisper away and if it becomes more serious ie threatenting behaviour/witness intimidation report it to the police.

I wouldn't say anything. Just hold on. The tide will turn, for sure, and if you have continued to act correctly and treat everyone as well as possible, it will turn towards you.

What a horrible experience for the lady who was hit, and for you

You wouldn't expect this type of person to react rationally though would you? Anyone who is drinking and then doing the school run drunk is clearly not rational and in deep denial. Obviously as she was breathalysed and the accident was witnessed by police officers it would make no difference to the outcome even if you had refused to make a statement.

I think the best that you can do if anyone say anything to you about it is to say that you hope that this will be the wake-up call that she needs to seek help for her drinking problem. That will come across as sympthetic and reasonable and will make her friends' attempts to portray you as nasty/vintictive seem very silly.

the other driver could have made an error but the full weight of the law will find that being over the limit means you should not have been driving therefore involvement in an accident is your fault...
curious but true

Friends are clearly idiots: why would you care what they do, say or think?

YANBU. I agree with Captainunderpants though, don't get into any sort of conversation with them, as she may have been over the limit due to drinking the night before and not necessarily pissed She is, of course, completely to blame for it and she should not have been driving, but there's no point in fanning the flames.

What a horrid situation for you to be in, do you have plenty of friends in the playground to be with?

That woman is a disgrace and if, instead of keeping her head down, and facing up to the consequences of what she did (i.e. quietly accepting whatever punishment she gets), she is whipping up a frenzy of hateful gossip then she is a totally arrogant and irresponsible bitch.

I'd keep quiet about confronting her, or even getting involved in justifying yourself to others unless anyone directly questions you.

However, if this does end up in court, I'd make damn sure that the local newspaper was advised there might be a juicy story there for them. An over the limit mother in a 4x4 (in particluar) on the school ruhn - they'll be bound to headline that one.

And then what will the callous cow say to her ignorant, nothing-better-to-do-than-tittle-tattle hangers-on ???

Morning or afternoon school run???

I hope they throw the book at her, although that doesn't make your situation any better.

You know that she is in the wrong, although that doesn't give you the magic ability to rise above the nastiness.

Counting to 10 time I think.

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YADeffoNBU

People like her should be banned for life.

How is the pregnant lady? Is the baby okay?

I bet not all the other mums think you're in the wrong. She sounds just the sort who'd be a natural bully and I bet a good proportion of them nod their heads and make sympathetic clucking noises because they're scared to do otherwise. The ones who believe she's hard done by have either not been told the full story, or else are empty airheads who are no better than she is if they genuinely think drink-driving is okay.

Isn't there an old saying about empty vessels making the most noise ?

I bet not all the other mums think you're in the wrong. She sounds just the sort who'd be a natural bully and I bet a good proportion of them nod their heads and make sympathetic clucking noises because they're scared to do otherwise. The ones who believe she's hard done by have either not been told the full story, or else are empty airheads who are no better than she is if they genuinely think drink-driving is okay.

Isn't there an old saying about empty vessels making the most noise ?

you are NOT being unreasonable - the other woman sounds like a horror. really hope the pg lady is ok.

Who cares what the school gate thinks?

You're doing the right thing - hold your head high. I wouldn't get drawn into speculating about the whys and wherefores with anyone, least of all the breath test thing - just give your statement to what you saw to the relevant bodies and leave it at that.

I hope the pg lady is ok.

YANBU, hold your head up, you're in the right and they are most definitely in the wrong and face it, would you really want to speak to this coven of morally bankrupt spanners? No, of course not.
Hope the pg woman was ok.

and what should you have done to appease the mothers clique? Lie to the police about what you saw...
Regardless of what you saw, this woman will lose her license and require all of ehr closest friends to ferry ehr kids to school for her.
let's hope they are as good friends as the seem huh
She was pissed she has no one to blame but herself

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Good luck alittleone2, I'm a bit stunned by the whole scenario you describe tbh!

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