AIBU - covid rules at baby group?

[Heckythump1]

I took my little one to a baby group yesterday, one we've been too before, but this was a different session to last term as she's a bit older this time.

The group has some very simple covid rules -

• masks to be work in the buggy area, and until you're sat on your individual mat

• stay on individual mat unless retrieving mobile baby (there were no mobile babies in the group)

• when the group all comes together at the end masks to be worn

• only one adult per baby

Every single rule was broken yesterday.

One woman had a friend with her. My husband had a week off during the last term and would have loved to have come but the rules said he couldn't so he didn't.

There were only three of us wearing masks during the group bit even though the leader said to put masks on.

There were a few Mums who obviously knew each other wandering around take photos of their babies together on their various mats.

Nobody except me wore a mask in the pushchair area.

I'm not an anxious person and this isn't my first baby.
I also don't think it's the group leaders fault as she did ask people to follow the rules they just ignored her.
It just made me feel really uncomfortable and I don't know what to do.
I've paid a lot of money for the group so I can't just not go again and all the other sessions across the week are booked up, so I can't change session either!

Personally yes I think YABU. People everywhere are phasing this stuff out, which is fairly appropriate for the risk Covid presents to the vast, vast majority of adults. I think that people who can’t tolerate that risk now need to manage that for themselves in whatever way.

@MiddleParking

Personally yes I think YABU. People everywhere are phasing this stuff out, which is fairly appropriate for the risk Covid presents to the vast, vast majority of adults. I think that people who can’t tolerate that risk now need to manage that for themselves in whatever way.

I honestly am not anxious about covid at all, but this group is held in two tiny rooms and we all come together in one of the tiny rooms at the end, both rooms are smaller than my living room! And what happens if 5 people bring a friend next week because the woman yesterday was allowed to?

I think in this instance you ask for your money back as you are concerned it isn't covid safe. Be kind and respectful explain you know the leader asked the right things but they weren't being followed and for that reason you were unhappy. If it's all sold out she shouldn't have trouble filling your space.

MiddleParking has voiced how many people feel and for that reason you won't see people following the advice - whatever is asked of them. So for your sanity this group isn't for you.

You could try asking for your money back as the rules that you signed up on the basis on are not being followed.

But this really wouldn’t bother me at all.

I would speak to the leader to ask how they’re going to managing this in the future

@MiddleParking

Personally yes I think YABU. People everywhere are phasing this stuff out, which is fairly appropriate for the risk Covid presents to the vast, vast majority of adults. I think that people who can’t tolerate that risk now need to manage that for themselves in whatever way.

It's not up to people to decide this, regardless of how we feel about the government rules we are meant to be following them. I for one, do not want to go backwards, this sort of behaviour will force us into lockdown when it's multiplied across the country.

Op yanbu,I would also ask for my money back.

Why should I have to stop going because other people won't follow the rules though? My baby loves it and I do too, normally!

I honestly am not anxious about covid at all, but this group is held in two tiny rooms and we all come together in one of the tiny rooms at the end, both rooms are smaller than my living room!
And what happens if 5 people bring a friend next week because the woman yesterday was allowed to?

I don’t really understand what you mean, if you’re not anxious about Covid why would any of that be a problem?

It's not up to people to decide this

I mean, you can say so, but it won’t get you very far.

Could your husband have taken baby to the group by himself when he was off work? (Not the main point, I know, but just a suggestion for him if you know he’d like it!)

I'd message the group leader and get some feedback on their plans moving forward. If people going are not sticking to the rules then THEY shouldn't be able to go. I don't see why you have to stop going because people can't be bothered to wear a mask for a small amount of time.

If its such a tiny room, and the rules are honestly there to try and stop the spread surely masks should be worn all the time (personally I wouldn't and think they're mostly pointless but I wear one when I have to). The fact that you think is fine to not have one on the mat makes me think this is more about rule following than actual risk, if you see what I mean.

When we're in two separate rooms we're over a metre apart because of how the mats are set out, this isn't the case when both rooms come together obviously.

@LittleRa

Could your husband have taken baby to the group by himself when he was off work? (Not the main point, I know, but just a suggestion for him if you know he’d like it!)

Yes I suppose he could of, but it would have been nice to be allowed to enjoy it together like the woman and her friend yesterday!

I think that people who can’t tolerate that risk now need to manage that for themselves in whatever way.

Yes OP it’s your fault and not the knobs who brazenly think that they get to choose what rules that apply to them. Push back on the leader of the group, I know it’s hard because I manage groups regularly and despite the rules being in place for a year and them being desperate to come together again, they try to ignore them. I remind them that the organisations I work for will get fined if they don’t follow the rules, they are guests of the location and if they don’t want to respect the rules they are free to go elsewhere.

I spend an extra 30 minutes moving tables and arranging chairs to maintain distance rules, only for them to be moved whenever my back is turned, I really do expect more from supposed adults. I have no problem pointing to the exit when someone tries to lecture me on my ‘sheep’ mentality.

The leader is responsible for maintaining group order and I would politely but firmly tell them that.

There’s something monumentally selfish in putting someone’s job at risk because people think that they get to choose what rules apply to them.

@AgentJohnson

There’s something monumentally selfish in putting someone’s job at risk because people think that they get to choose what rules apply to them.

The woman might quite reasonably feel that her job is more at risk if the majority of her service users decide to take their money (that she’s not been able to earn for most of the year) elsewhere if she’s too militant about the rules. That seems a more likely prospect than a fine.

The op has said she isn't worried about the Covid risk. If that's the case then you have no grounds really to be annoyed. If they're allowing other people to being someone, surely you can to. If keeping rules is important to you, that's fine, but not everyone feels the same.

@MiddleParking

Personally yes I think YABU. People everywhere are phasing this stuff out, which is fairly appropriate for the risk Covid presents to the vast, vast majority of adults. I think that people who can’t tolerate that risk now need to manage that for themselves in whatever way.

ALL attendees have agreed to the terms and conditions. If they don't like this, then the group isn't the right one for them, and imo, should forfeit their payments if they don't wish to abide by them.

Though yet again, with the wet manner that the government has let people decide that they're exempt, this is now so hard to police and I feel for the op and group leader.

the group isn't the right one for them

Seems like it is!

What if I decide to vote with my feet and leave? I'd also then not return next term, so that's two terms fees she'd lose!
That argument works both ways.

@Heckythump1 I'd be annoyed too, especially as you'd have liked your husband there but another person brought her friend!

[quote DocsOddSocks]@Heckythump1 I'd be annoyed too, especially as you'd have liked your husband there but another person brought her friend![/quote]
I'd take him this term since it seems it's ok for some people to, but he doesn't have any time off until August now 😛

The group leader needs to step up, she sounds a bit wet.