Do you buy gifts for adult birthday parties?

[thecolourmauve]

I’ve been invited to a colleague’s birthday party in a couple of weeks time. I’ve known her for about three years and we’re friends but not close friends. She’s having a barbecue in the garden so it’s all fairly informal.

I’m not sure what to do about presents - should I buy her a little something and a card as well, or is it acceptable to bring a bottle and leave it at that?

It’s been so long since I’ve socialised that I’ve forgotten what’s expected!

We’re all in our early 40s in case that’s relevant.

I imagine you’re planning to bring something to drink/share anyway. A decent bottle she can save to enjoy later and/or a plant in a nice pot should do the trick!

I’d take a card and either a nice bottle of something or a bunch of flowers - which is what I’d take a host regardless of whether it was a birthday or not.

Bring a bottle, some flowers and a card.

Thanks! You wouldn’t expect a wrapped present then?

I wouldn’t turn up empty handed on someone’s birthday

Card and nice wine or flowers for a colleague or acquaintance. Wrapped gifts are for close friends. That’s how I call it, anyway.

I'd probably take wine and a plant as a gift, if I didn't know her that well. If I did I'd buy her something that she'd like that's more personal I. E. A book.

@Stichintime I wasn’t planning to turn up empty handed, just wondering if a bottle of wine was enough or if I need something else.

I would never consider turning up empty handed to a party or a meal that I had been invited to, regardless of it’s a birthday or not.
For adult birthday parties I would usually buy the host a personal gift eg a book, fancy nail polish, wine etc.

Colleague that I know well but not a close friend I would think a card and bottle of wine or food gift would be appropriate.

If it’s a birthday, I would bring a gift.

If it was a birthday I would definitely buy a gift. Even if just a gift card.

Unless you know the recruitment would appreciate a specific plant, don't take a plant. They're not gifts, they're obligations. The last thing anyone needs is ten plants which need conditions that don't match the space you've got available, and you feel obliged to try and keep alive, even though you never wanted the things and they just look depressing as they inevitably die anyway.

I usually take a bottle of Prosecco in this situation. I had a party for my 40th and received about 20 bottles, it was great!

Like pp I wouldn't bring a wrapped gift unless it was a close friend. A nice bottle or bunch of flowers should be fine.

I would bring either flowers or prosecco.

Well if going to a BBQ you would bring a bottle anyway so if you are doing that for her birthday I would get two and pop one in a gift bag and kinda say one for the birthday girl and one just to say thank you for hosting, or similar. Wine is fine, just not bottle you would have brought anyway, if you get me.

I guess it depends how well you know someone. I have a tiny flat and don't even own a vase. And I don't drink. Vouchers can be got at a reasonable costs for shops giving ppl a wide option of what to buy.

One year even though a colleague knew I didn't drink got me foe secret Santa, she got me wine and cheap glasses that were repulsive. She was the known bitch at work. I gave the wine to a friend and binned the glasses.

@thecolourmauve - if not a great friend so you do not know her taste I would turn up with a nice bottle of wine and then ( if she likes them ) a wrapped up box of chocolates or similarly wrapped up a nice candle / diffuser thing. ) not hugely imaginative but usually very well received. I do not have a sweet tooth so I would go for candle / diffuser thing. Does not need to be hugely expensive.

I would bring a bottle and then maybe flower or nice chocolates or a plant and a card.

Rarely go to an adult birthday party, they tend to be for big milestone birthdays few and far between but I’d go with a card and flowers for them.

I would take something for hosting-bottle or flowers, plus a card and a gift. I might go for a recipe book plus some chocolates, or a gift card.

Bottle and flowers

Thanks all, glad I asked as I’d probably have taken a bottle only.

I'd take something as a hostess gift, and a card, but would be unlikely to buy something as an actual present unless it was someone I would buy a birthday present for anyway.

Unless it's a milestone birthday, then I'd take a bottle of nice fizz (unless they didn't drink).