To be annoyed with my friend, the sanitiser obsessive

[lemonsonatree]

She's obsessed with it, and obsessed with reminding anyone within a 5 mile radius to use it.

She was bad before covid, now just ridiculous.

The assumption that we're all gross and germ-ridden all the time is getting rather thin.

• [Title edited by MNHQ]

That sounds utterly tedious.

Tell her it’s triggering your skin and you’ve been advised to limit your usage.

She should learn to use soap and water. Sanitisers are a poor substitute when you can't access anything else and really not recommended for children - unless you are desperate.

She is gross.

she needs to get a grip.
preferably unsanitised

Ha! She should look at the damage dripping sanitizer dispensers cause to plastics, carpets and metals. She wouldn’t go near sanitizer again.

Well what does she actually do / say and in what circumstances?

It's not unreasonable for her to remind you what if you are at her house or if you are all eating or something

I know people like this and they drive me nuts. You’re right that it’s the insinuation that you aren’t clean enough/concerned about hygiene that’s the most annoying.

@ElderMillennial if a friend reminded me to use sanitizer when we were about to eat together she’d get short shrift from me. I’m not a child.

or if you are all eating or something

Urg

@SmidgenofaPigeon I'm sure but hopefully you wouldn't need to be reminded eg if at a friends' house for a bbq

Some people are a bit lax with hygiene to be fair

I don't know what the situation is that OP is talking about but maybe some people need reminding eg I know people who would come to our house and touch things they don't need to touch without thinking to wash their hands or sanitise. Some people just don't think about it and someone who is very hygiene conscious might feel the need to say something.

I'm sure but hopefully you wouldn't need to be reminded eg if at a friends' house for a bbq

You’d wash your hands with soap and water.

This sloshing of sanitiser everywhere and at every opportunity is totally gross.

@ElderMillennial no, I stand by my point- I’m an adult so if you have invited me to your house, trust I’ve washed my hands and observed good hygiene. If you’re going to patronise me by reminding me, or getting anxious about the possibility I might be spreading germs, I’d suggest you’re not ready to have guests over. It’s not good hosting.

OK an example of the type of situation I am thinking of

Last year two friends came here with their children. Covid was about so we invited them over to have a bbq outside. At one point DH had been making the kids a ham sandwich with some nice ham I had just bought from the butchers. Quite a lot as there were a few of us and it would last us a few days.

DH was making sandwiches while I was washing up some cups. Phone rang so DH went to answer it. Before I could get over there to take his place and finish making the sandwiches, she had taken over making the sandwiches, touching all the ham. I would have expected her to wash her hands first.

I didn't say anything but because she didn't that meant I didn't want any of the ham I had bought partly for myself and I think it should be standard to wash your hands before preparing food especially if in someone else's house and touching food that is also meant for others during a pandemic.

Like I say, I don't know the situation OP is talking about, but sometimes it is others' business if someone chooses not to wash or sanitize.

Yes washing is better but unfortunately I know people don't do it.

I am big on hand washing and sanitising if I can't wash. I don't tell others to sanitise or wash their hands but I know some adults don't know when to wash.

@SmidgenofaPigeon If you came to my house, I would most likely know if you had washed your hands on arrival. Having washing them at home an hour before might not suffice but some people would think it's fine.

I don’t think I have any friends who’d monitor my hand washing/sanitising. I intend to keep it that way.

@TheKeatingFive

I'm sure but hopefully you wouldn't need to be reminded eg if at a friends' house for a bbq

You’d wash your hands with soap and water.

This sloshing of sanitiser everywhere and at every opportunity is totally gross.

I have never, ever been at a BBQ where anyone refused their burger until they'd been to wash their hands. Or in a restaurant, at a buffet or picnic where people go to wash their hands before eating.

Maybe my friends are all minging and I don't dispute that it's recommended, I just don't think that's the way real people live.

@TheKeatingFive

I don’t think I have any friends who’d monitor my hand washing/sanitising. I intend to keep it that way.

I keep a spreadsheet. I also ask them when they last washed armpits, fannies etc.

I keep a spreadsheet. I also ask them when they last washed armpits, fannies etc.

I guess if you’re going to do it, do it properly. 🤣

@DirectionsForUse agree. In a restaurant of course I wash my hands well when using the bathroom. I don’t leap up to wash my hands when I see the food arriving. I don’t know anyone that does.

Kids are different. I’m a nanny and I always enforce hand washing before eating, and when we arrive home, because they can be grubby little buggers that stick their hands in unsavoury places.

I have never, ever been at a BBQ where anyone refused their burger until they'd been to wash their hands. Or in a restaurant, at a buffet or picnic where people go to wash their hands before eating.

But what about the person who is preparing or giving out food? Wouldn't you want them to have washed their hands.

Eg someone at a bbq we had took over the BBQing (DH let them) and then was putting burgers in buns and brought one over to me in his hands.

I didn't say anything. I just took it. But really I didn't want someone touching my food without washing their hands.

I'm a bit of a clean freak but then I think that's basic hygiene before touching someone else's food and during a pandemic.

But again I haven't told friends to wash hands or use sanitizer. I'm just thinking I'd situations where someone might eg if DD wanted to prep the salad or make sandwiches for a party I'd ask her to wash hands first.

I know someone like this, I just ignore them, it's unnecessary imo but I guess they'll slowly simmer down with the paranoia, hope so anyway!

@ShirleyPhallus

I’m torn here. Yes, it sounds like she’s a bit over the top and O can see how that is annoying. However, if it were in the instance of shared food (ie BBQ, picnic) then I would be insisting that everyone sanitise before sharing spoons etc. I wouldn’t normally, but in the middle of a pandemic, I absolutely would.

@Covidatemyhomework

I’m torn here. Yes, it sounds like she’s a bit over the top and O can see how that is annoying. However, if it were in the instance of shared food (ie BBQ, picnic) then I would be insisting that everyone sanitise before sharing spoons etc. I wouldn’t normally, but in the middle of a pandemic, I absolutely would.

How rude.

If you are that precious, don't go for a shared food situation.

I personally don't share spoons etc with people anyway.
And I have yet to go to a bbq where the cook was licking the burgers or handling them with bare hands. That would hurt for a start...

The risk of fomite transmission of Covid via surfaces has been proven at this stage to be virtually non existent. We didn’t know that last March, but we do now.

Yeah with the ham thing, ideally sure she could have washed her hands. But she presumably was making the sandwiches for her own kids. That wouldn’t have made me waste the rest of the ham.

Someone handing me a burger in a bun with their bare hands? It’s a bbq, not formal dining. I couldn’t care less.