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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Is my neighbour BU about noise

76 replies

immacyoolat · 05/06/2021 15:49

We live in a cul de sac of bungalows mostly with older people. A lot of the cul de sacs on the estate are also bungalows and the main road through is bigger often detached family homes with a few bungalows. The whole estate is generally quiet as no real through traffic.

Over last few months we have had a couple of kids use the cul de sac to play in and they roller skate or cycle up and down. Only really at weekends and maybe for a few hours at most. It's been half term here last week and they have been here every day.

The kids are not related to anyone on the cul de sac but they have been making normal children noise (I'd say they are early teens). Today elderly neighbour has been out shouting at them for making lots of noise and telling them they shouldn't be here if they don't live here. I could hear as had windows open. By time I got outside to see what was going on they had gone away.

I spoke to neighbour who said he has been speaking to some other neighbours and they are fed up of the noise from these children and they should go to the park. They don't live on the close so shouldn't be playing here and the reason old people move places like this is because of the peace and quiet (his words).

I think my neighbour is BU as they aren't here all the time and he didn't need to shout at them to make his point.

What do you think, is he BU? I'm asking because no doubt I'll get asked about it at some point.

OP posts:

SueSaid · 05/06/2021 17:06

Dc should play outside their own homes or in parks, it isn't isn't law obviously it is just basic courtesy. Particularly as the cul de sac is predominantly older residents. Who tf wants to hear kids rollerskating about when they don't even live there!

SpeakingFranglais · 05/06/2021 17:11

When you have children a certain age you are tolerant of other peoples, when your own get past it they are bloody irritating. Fact.

That’s why there are those adult only holidays.

They should play elsewhere but I guess you can’t stop them.

princesslarmadrama · 05/06/2021 17:13

If the children don't live on the road they shouldn't be playing on yours end of. If they have gardens or green space nearby then they need herding there. I'd be miffed if kids that didn't live near me played outside my house.

osbertthesyrianhamster · 05/06/2021 17:14

If they're on the street he's fighting a losing battle.

osbertthesyrianhamster · 05/06/2021 17:15

@SpeakingFranglais

When you have children a certain age you are tolerant of other peoples, when your own get past it they are bloody irritating. Fact.

That’s why there are those adult only holidays.

They should play elsewhere but I guess you can’t stop them.

That's true, though.

user1471538283 · 05/06/2021 17:23

The children should play near their homes. I would be worried sick if my DS played in another street. But some parents dont want the noise so get them to go elsewhere. I'm very sensitive to noise but children playing doesn't bother me.

Ilikewinter · 05/06/2021 17:24

I totally agree with your neighbour, 2 summers ago we had a group of upto 10 kids playing in our close, nobe of them live on the street, the girls were the worst as they took delight in having screaming matches. It went on all of the 6 weeks holidays, the only good thing about lock down was last summer was it was peacefull. Im waiting to see what this summer brings.

Bluedeblue · 05/06/2021 17:25

SpeakingFranglais

When you have children a certain age you are tolerant of other peoples, when your own get past it they are bloody irritating. Fact.

That’s why there are those adult only holidays.

They should play elsewhere but I guess you can’t stop them.

I completely agree with this. My kids are 24 and 22. I have no desire to hear screaming kids and toddlers, especially when my own didn't behave that way.

Love an Adults only holiday - bliss!

SilverGoblin · 05/06/2021 17:32

Outside our flat there is a green space. A few trees, grass criss crossed with paths to various blocks of flats and other parts of the estate. It's an area with flats and houses, a mix of social housing, private rentals and private homes. It's a quite leafy oasis in the middle of a former industrial area surrounded by a lot of factories and shops but there are local parks and other green spaces dotted around.

To be honest, it's mostly used as a dog toilet for the whole estate which is gross, I know. This mostly happens early morning and late evening.

Every day, three to four women set up on that grass with rugs and cushions. Between them, they have about fourteen children ranging from about two to fourteen but have counted twenty kids or so at the weekend.

Nothing wrong with that you might say but we renters have to pay for the groundskeeping of that green space as it's right under our windows and belongs to our landlord. Have for the last fourteen months, whenever it's not raining, had to to tolerate endless very loud screaming and shrieking for anything up to eight hours in a day. Then there's the constant bang of footballs and scrapping noise of scooters and skateboards.

They don't live here, there is no way you'd fit that many children in one of these small flats.

They are using it like their own private park.

It's just a dog shit and piss covered bit of grass w. I just don't understand the attraction myself. I certainly don't want to sit out there.

I can mostly ignore it but it does get to you sometimes, especially when the couple that do that high pitched screech have not stopped doing it for hours.

Maybe your neighbour just snapped if it's constant.

quizqueen · 05/06/2021 17:35

Children need to play in their own back garden or in front of their own house or at the park. No way should they be a nuisance to someone living in another street.

MrsBongiovi · 05/06/2021 17:36

It is yes absolutely a public road.

There’s your answer.

We had a neighbour like this, in the end everyone hated her. Thankfully we moved.

MrsBongiovi · 05/06/2021 17:36

Children need to play in their own back garden or in front of their own house or at the park.

You’ve made that up.

FrangipaniBlue · 05/06/2021 17:45

YANBU

There's a park on the new build estate beside us, as well as a large area of grassland further around the estate.

When DS(13) and his friends go on the park to play the parents of smaller children complain about "bigger kids" spoiling things for little ones. When they go on the area of grassland and play football the people in the houses across the road complain (because like your neighbours they bought their houses away from the park expecting "quiet") and tell them to go play on the park. If they ride around on their bikes people complain they're "causing a nuisance".

Teenagers really can't win and I swear people would only be happy with them locked in their houses!

cadburyegg · 05/06/2021 17:49

I think your neighbour is BU. It’s a public road, kids have been stuck inside for months on end due to a combination of lockdown and poor weather, and it’s half term.

UserEleventyNine · 05/06/2021 17:58

The children should play near their homes. I would be worried sick if my DS played in another street.

OP says these children are early teens, not little kids. They don't need to play near their homes. They can take themselves off to a playing field or recreation ground.

MrsBongiovi · 05/06/2021 18:01

They can take themselves off to a playing field or recreation ground.

Or to any public road.

Evenstar · 05/06/2021 18:07

I can understand that the noise must be very irritating. We live on a corner on a route that many people take to the park, during the lockdowns we have endured a constant stream of bikes (often with. noisy stabilisers), scooters and skateboards plus the constant noise of conversations. This has increased exponentially whilst people have nowhere else to go.

We have no way to reduce the noise and are off quite a busy road anyway, but if I was an elderly person in a quiet road with other elderly people then I probably would say something. The noise of wheels for hours a day and even low level children’s chatter is very intrusive.

magicstar1 · 05/06/2021 18:10

I agree with your neighbour. I live in a detached house in a cul de sac, because I want peace and quiet. I wouldn’t want children that don’t even live here making noise all day.

bunnybuggs · 05/06/2021 18:15

@Chamonixshoopshoop

YANBU, poor kids. They need to roam a bit after such a shit year, in which they sacrificed their schooling/life to protect people like your neighbour.

not this again - we have ( all ages and situations ) had a difficult year and none of us have sacrificed anything specifically for other demographics - it was to save the NHS - or have you forgotten.

Daffodil123456 · 05/06/2021 18:15

How far away is the park?

Tbf I wouldn’t mind kids playing outside my house instead I have mid 20’s to early 30 year old males hanging around outside my house selling & smoking drugs all day.

MrsBongiovi · 05/06/2021 18:16

I live in a detached house in a cul de sac, because I want peace and quiet. I wouldn’t want children that don’t even live here making noise all day.

A detached house doesn’t give you that right though if the road is public. You need to buy a house with land and no neighbours, until then, tough, deal with it.

ElephantOfRisk · 05/06/2021 18:37

I guess the unwritten rule is that you play on your own street or the park unless you are playing with someone in their street. I wouldn't be happy if my own DC were picking a random street to go and play in if there were other places they could play. Kids in my street started playing cricket up the middle of the road including stumps and were getting annoyed when cars came, then sticking out their hands to get cars to stop. We live about 100 meters from a playground and about 200 from a playpark including a full sized football pitch and extra grass area. DH told them they had 5 seconds to shift their stuff or he was driving over it. If none of that existed i think i'd be more understanding about kids randomly arriving to play rather than just playing as they pass through (which is perfectly fine).

MrsBongiovi · 05/06/2021 18:50

DH told them they had 5 seconds to shift their stuff or he was driving over it.

What a twat.

ElephantOfRisk · 05/06/2021 18:55

@MrsBongiovi

DH told them they had 5 seconds to shift their stuff or he was driving over it.

What a twat.

So you'd happily sit and wait to drive into your own street while a bunch of kids had set up cricket stumps in the middle of the road? When there are other places to play? He's already stopped and was expecting them to move, only to have a kid turn and hold his hand up telling him to wait while they carried on playing. I'd have just kept on driving slowly towards them until they shifted it.

MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 05/06/2021 18:56

@MasterBeth

Your neighbour is a cheeky fucker who doesn’t own the public realm outside her house.

I don’t think man’s behaviour ranks high in the annals of cheeky fuckerdom

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