Mother in Law Bought me a new engagement ring

[Debbierocket123]

Last year I got engaged (horary!) and due to the lockdown situation I had a bit more time for exercise so have lost a fair bit of weight and now my engagement ring no longer fits. My fiance went to get it resized but never kept the receipt and now the ring has snapped completely where it was repaired. My mother in law bought me a replacement ring but to be honest I don't really like it, it's not the ring my fiance chose for me and it doesn't sit well with my wedding ring. She was so excited about getting this ring for me and I don't want to hurt her feelings but I really don't think she should have bought it. I wanted the ring my fiance chose for me. What can I say to her? I don't want to sound ungrateful. It was incredibly thoughtful of her.

What have you said to MIL so far, OP?

Have you enthused over the ring and said you like it already?

I think an awkward honest convo with MIL is unavoidable really. She needs her money back and you and DP need to chose a ring of your own.

I think your MIL is a gigantic weirdo. Honestly, who the hell would do something like this? Buying a replacement engagement ring for your son's fiancee? It's not sweet, it's inappropriate and just bizarre.

This doesn't bode well for the future, imo.

That was a sweet gesture by MIL but I do understand. I would chat with your Oh and have a planned 'losing' of the ring in a year or two when he can afford to get you a new one. You can always tell mil you claimed on insurance.

Is a bit odd for your mil to replace ring!
Are you married already ? But also confused if you only got engaged last year and resizing caused it to snap??
That sounds a bit dodgy tbh it should last years and years.
The jeweller should have a record of repair or it will be on bank statement or credit card statement so should be easy to sort but another jeweller would be a better bet.
Do you think she is trying to cover something up or over compensate for her son?
None of it sounds right.
But totally understandable you want an engagement ring from her son not her.
Although as previous poster said a mil that buys you diamonds shouldn't be sniffed at best ive got from mine is a pair of socks from poundland🤣

It’s not sweet. It would have been sweet if she’d said I’ll pay for a new one of your choice.
She just wanted the fun of choosing a nice ring.
Tell her to take it back, but you appreciate the gesture.

Extra super weird. Have you started wearing it? I would give it back immediately. As you say, the ring is between you and your partner, not your mil.

I've been in a similar / not so similar situation.. My mums engagement ring broke, the diamond fell out. She was devastated, been married for 20 years and wore it every day. They didn't have a lot of money at the time so my dad was trying to save to get it fixed/buy her a new one. My mum kept saying she felt naked, lost without it. Being a lot more technologically inclined, I searched the Web high and low and found one that looked almost identical it just wasn't real, and was wayy cheaper!! My mam and dad were over the moon, she understood I bought it just for her to feel better while my dad got hers sorted though.. I would never have attempted to purchase something so personal on somebody else's behalf. Plus I'm her daughter, our relationship is a lot different to a MIL. Maybe your MIL was just trying to accomplish something similar? Are yous very close? I would do what others have commented, maybe use it until you can get yours fixed, or just explain to her that you're really appreciative it was a lovely gesture but you want your ring to be from the man you're going to marry..

I’m not sure I think it is sweet or kind, it’s an engagement ring, unless it’s some sort of family heirloom a la Prince William then the whole point is it comes from the fiancé, not his mother. Sweet or kind would be offering the son the money to choose a new ring.

Yes, I have already bought the wedding ring as we will be getting married in a couple of months. The ring my MIL bought doesn't sit against it and it's not diamonds (not that I care but someone mentioned it in a previous post). The ring is a year old and got it repaired recently and it's already snapped. I spoke to both my MIL and H2B that I really appreciate the gesture but when I look at my engagement ring I want to think of my husband, not my MIL! I left it with my H2B to sort out and do what he sees fit because it's his gift to me that means the most - I don't care what ring it is as long as it's from him.

Another note: she can be a bit overbearing of a parent but she was a refugee and maybe slightly overcompensating as a single mum so totally understand she wants to do all she can to help her son.