I will try keep this short to avoid any drip feed.
FIL has been tight with his money all his life, sent most money back home while his children wore second hand clothes. No treats not even a ice cream from the ice cream van was allowed because family back home needed money!
Well fast forward 30 years. FIL sold some land back home and it totalled up to around £250,000.
Fil has gave BIL and SIL £125,000 each to help them buy a house / put a substantial amount towards a house etc.
His reasoning behind not giving DH any or the 4th sibling (sil who is 12) Because I inherited a house a few years ago.
Also he has paid for BiL wedding and always helps them while me and my DH had a reception wedding because at the time we couldn't afford a proper wedding.
It gets even better, because my dh is the eldest, at some point we are expected to financially support them in old age and potentially have them live with us. Dh told him to save money for himself in the future and my youngest SIL who is only 12. As we will be expected to financially support the little SIL too! And FIL reasoning is we can sell my inherited house and buy a much bigger house for everyone able to live in! I've said no to this and it seems it infuriated FiL more as he said "well it's not my job to support myself so youse will have to work harder"
Also whenever there is a cost, fil will ask the siblings for money, but that often means we take money from our savings to help, but FIL is richer than us all. His reasoning again is "well I don't wanna spend my savings on day to day things" then why should we! It's got to the point I've stopped sharing finances because I'm not having my hard worked money go towards his family anymore.
Dh is really upset at this and doesn't even want to discuss them at old age but BIL says it's only fair as I have a house already and it wouldn't be fair for us to have two houses?
Aibu?