FT mums, do you feel the same?

[Soupforoneplease]

I have an unexpected day off today. I dropped my DS at preschool and then went home. The whole day to myself... it felt so strange. Nearly all my annual leave is booked to look after the DC's and usually we would go on holiday.
I can't believe this is life for some people. Going home, pottering around, exercise! Even doing the washing up whilst listening to a podcast uninterrupted! DD even has a play date after school so I have until 6pm to myself.
How many days like this do you have per year and how do you spend them?

I generally take 2 or 3 days annual leave a year while my kids are in childcare. I go shopping, meet friends, go to the gym, sit in coffee shops for hours with a book.

It's great as an occasional thing, but a whole life like that would bore the pants off me.

@BuffySummersReportingforSanity I think maybe the novelty would wear off. Working FT means I could spend money today and not feel guilty or panicky. Very few people I know have the economic situation to be able to have one SAHP and be able to spend money on a daily basis without bringing any in.

I have maybe the odd one or two days like this in the year - I’ll book an extra day with the childminder to have a bit of me time - go for a run, long peaceful dog walk, binge watching a few episodes of something that I usually only watch in the evening - I love pottering about, I could happily do more of it.

I am a teacher so only get days off when my DC are off. Obviously this is great for childcare but I wouldn't ever get a day to myself unless DH takes them out.

I used to work part-time and did enjoy the time to catch up on household jobs and school work in peace and quiet! The school day did seem to be very short when I wasn't working. When I am in school it seems much longer.....

I'm a SAHM but with preschool age children, so this happens literally never.

What's a FT mum? Are there PT mums?

@bitheby sorry I meant mums that work full time!

Is this really a thread for posters to reply saying, 'I couldn't do it everyday either, I would be sooo bored'? Because that's what it seems like - and I see you already have a few of those type of replies.

An unexpected day off is clearly a totally different thing to being a SAHM (or dad). People are all different, family situations are all different.

@JonSnowedUnder well what do you do if both children are out the house for a large part of the day? That's a genuine question?

I have a annual leave day booked on the 9th June. My plan is do nothing. I can’t wait

I do this usually for my birthday (if it falls midweek) to have an adult only lunch / day out and usually a couple of other days per year (e.g. christmas shopping midweek). When it happens unexpectedly it's a nice surprise

I've only been back at work for 8 months since finishing maternity leave with my first child. In that time I think I've had 2 annual leave days where my little boy was at the childminder's. I kind of felt like I was playing hooky or something... Getting all that wonderful time just to myself 😅😲

I used they days to potter about the house doing chores in half the time it would normally take and also had some nice/fun down time playing computer games (my hobby). I think I also went for a short walk one of those days cause the weather was nice and it was nice to stroll absentmindedly without having to consider interacting with anyone or pushing a pram etc. I hope to have maybe 3-4 of those days a year if possible whilst working full time. I really felt like my batteries had been recharged after it. Hoping we might also be able to have a couple of child free days as a couple now that we're allowed to visit family. However our little boy has barely spent any time with his grandparents due to the pandemic so we'll have to work up to that over time I think.

If it's a genuine question you should have phrased it that way, saying you can't believe it's life for some people is obviously going to invite comments such as the poster saying it would bore the pants off her.

I spend a lot of time doing things that free up our weekends, shopping, washing, cleaning - boring stuff but it needs doing and getting it out of the way during the week means more family time at weekends. I've got a few hobbies that I can spend time doing (upcycling/decorating/gardening). Obviously going back a year now but I did also meet friends, go to the gym etc. There are always random errands that I need to run. I honestly don't feel like I have nothing to fill my time.

It's not that hard to fill in the day, if you have primary school aged children they are only in school for around six hours a day anyway. I will say I do have the occasional day, maybe once a month or so where I come home and spend the whole day reading a book or watching the TV, I wouldn't do it everyday but love it once in a while.

I never get a full day to myself.

A few weeks ago we met a massive deadline so finished work at 12 instead of 4. I was so exhausted that I just climbed into bed and scrolled through MN for a bit, before doing a clean up and getting the dinner ready.

Every Friday
Most weeks I have breakfast with some other mums who have children with ASD, usually do some food shopping on way home.
Today I have painted a wall that was plastered a few weeks ago, done the ironing, tidied my room, tidied the kitchen, having a quick lunch. Then I’m going to the gym for an hour, will swing by the allotment if its stopped raining, if not I’m going to the cinema.
My son is 16 so no need for me to be in when he gets home.

As a result of the pandemic and cancelled leave/cancelled holidays I have a week I need to take before the end of June or I'll lose it.

I'm off with the kids over half term, and we're going away, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't just as excited about the fact that I'm on leave for the whole of the following week, while they are at school.

I have planned so many exciting things, like 'book the car in for its service without worrying about dashing back for a meeting' and 'clear out the kids' cupboards without protestations that the toy that's been untouched for two years is one of their Most Precious Things'.

(I've also booked some museums and galleries just for the bloody novelty value.)

I work 32 hours a week across 4 days. Technically “full time” but really, it’s part time.

I love my Friday off. Only recently I’ve begun to have it for myself for various reasons.

I'm so jealous of people who have days like this every week. Their houses must be so clean! Their lives so organised! They're probably much fitter, healthier and slimmer than me too and their weekends are freed up for nice things.

What do you mean you can't believe it is life for some people? Surely it was your life before you had children?

Before I had children I worked full-time so it wasn't my life before children.

I work Wednesday-Saturday so have every Monday/Tuesday at home alone. I work 30 hours over the 4 days so technically part time but I’m also a full time uni student so although I spend most of my days off studying I can have down time when I feel like it plus I have just finished uni for the summer so although I have the prep work and some books to read ready for the next term I can relax a lot more. I tend to get all my jobs done first thing then go for a run in the morning so I can spend the afternoon watching Netflix 😆

Nope

my house is clean, but untidy, I’m 3 stone overweight and have a list of things to do as long as two arms.
I’m a single parent, my son has additional needs, eveything falls to me.
I do believe that a bit of downtime for me, and having three days to get stuff done instead of cramming it all into the weekend, means I can cope better with everything on my plate

[quote Soupforoneplease]@JonSnowedUnder well what do you do if both children are out the house for a large part of the day? That's a genuine question?[/quote]
Well what did you do before you had kids?

You do that!

I read, watch telly, exercise, see friends, go shopping, do errands or chores, plan adventures, do hobbies etc etc

I don’t work and my kids are at school. I do have a fair chunk of leisure time yes. I do all the housework, shopping etc and I also do a lot of volunteering. And I have a child with SEN who cannot cope with childcare, so whenever the children aren’t at school I’m looking after them. I get a lot of phone calls from school too (can I just bring x for him, he’s upset can I come and talk to him, he’s injured, he’s had a toileting accident, he’s refusing to come in from the playground....) and a lot of medical appointments for him.

I’m not remotely bored or lonely or unable to spend money! And my house is a mess. But everyone is happy, so it works for us.

I’m currently sat here with a cup of tea, in silence for the first time in a long time. I have 2 pre school DC. Youngest is with daddy asleep in the sling, eldest has gone to pre school for the afternoon.

House is mostly clean. I’m ignoring the washing up that is staring at me, and enjoying the peace.