To ask if anyone has left UK, moved back and now hates it?

[Sillawithans]

Just that really, no offence intended to anyone.

Haven't read the full thread, but it just looked a bit lonely on page 4 with no responses so just wanted to say hi.

I did for 12 years. Came back 5 years ago. I'm glad I did, but I do despair that people here don't seem to mind being walked all over by the powers that be. Glad to be able to see family regularly.

I think it’s not uncommon among returning emigrants. Not the UK, but I can think of several sets of people I know who lived for decades in another country, moved ‘home’ (to different countries) and left again within a few years because they were unhappy. The ‘home’ countries in question were the US, Ireland and Italy.

Nope! I lived in India and the Philippines for 8 years and loved every minute. Moved back to the UK 7 years ago and very happy here too. Have been at very different stages in my life in each country though which has probably made the transition easier. Was young and single in India and then lived with my future husband in the Philippines and then we got married and started a family when we moved back to the UK.

Watching with interest. If you have a look at one of my threads I've created you'll see I'm currently navigating on whether we move back or not.

Few things
Where are you now
How long have you been away
Why did you leave in the first place
Have you moved around a lot
What are you looking for that your current country can't give you

No, I'm happy to be back. Especially at the moment.

You have to give any life change at least 18 months! Unless things are unutterably awful you can’t really form a just opinion of ant situation in less than 18 months.

No.
Moved twice overseas, a total of 6 years out of the UK.
Moved back, obviously, have never regretted it. In both countries, the corruption, inherent racism and sexism were rife. Both times it played into my decision to come back, although my primary reason for the last move home was my abusive ex.
I’ve found that wherever you go, there are wonderful differences and not so wonderful ones. It is, for me, part of finding out where you want to be.

Lived overseas for 21 years been back for 8 years. I miss it every single bloody day if I think about it. So I try not to. I have created a totally different life to my overseas life and have created a new happy. I can't live the life I lived overseas here and I couldn't live the life I live here overseas.

I loved the first lockdown because of the quiet it brought all around me which is what I missed so much. It was hard to slot back in as so much had changed and the bureacracy of many things was crazy. But my children (came back with them for Uni) love it here have lots of lovely friends and are settled.
I find people in England quite cold and distant and it is hard to make friends (partly me too I guess). All my best friends are spread around the world which I hate.

I finally have a job I love and work with people who make me laugh.
Returning 'home' is hard as is trying to work out exactly where 'home' is.

@Barnowl25 agree, once you've had a taste of living in a different country for at least a few years it becomes harder and harder to know where is truly home.

I wouldn't move back to the UK for a million quid. I did enjoy my time in London, though I wouldn't fancy it now.

I did. Moved abroad for 15 years. Moved back when we had kids and couldn't stand it. We moved abroad again (to the same country) 7 years later and now split time between the two (not during covid, obviously) though mainly in the other country.

The main things were that I found people in the UK too negative about just about everything and put too much value on conforming (especially in schools). I also missed the sunshine. I'd grown up in the UK in an environment that was looking forward and engaging in the world in a really positive way, full of new ideas and excitement and I came back to a UK on the brink of voting for Brexit and just bloody miserable. It was a bit of a shock.

We lived in Oz for two years. It nearly killed off our marriage. I’m glad we’re back now, not sure dh was too happy at the time, but I’m glad as never really settled into Oz. I think I found it difficult as my dc were small and I was not working. Dh wasn’t much help with dds. Dd2 was 3mo when we moved out.

Following with interest as we're contemplating coming back to UK after 14 years overseas. It was always the plan, as no-one really retires where we are (too expensive on a fixed income) but timing was always fluid. I do worry that I would hate it for reasons I cant actually fully put my finger on (maybe just worrying that there will be things I'd forgotten about that would grate my gears), but at the same time I think I'm quite realistic about the UK and accept that first few years would be hard. For me, benefits would be

• much better job prospects for me and more diverse economy
• more space (both house but also just generally)
• family (my parents aren't getting any younger)
• weather (don't laugh- I don't mind wind/rain but find constant heat and humidity somewhat oppressive)
• slightly better schools for DC- also UK has more of a risk taking culture (in a good way)- here the educational culture makes kids quite cautious IMO.
• way better cultural scene (museums, galleries, theatre etc).

The thing that would be more of a concern in UK relative to where I am
is mainly low level anti-social behaviour and crime and crappier public transport. Also, my parents might annoy me if I saw them more . and I think it would be harder to make friends. I would also really really miss my gym (not a reason to stay, I know).

Sorry- to add- I think my indecision is compounded by the fact that if we move back, the DC are at an age where we really need to stick it out till they finish school so cannot risk the "ping pong expat" scenario.

Friends moved respectively to Turkey, Spain and Australia, they all moved back to the UK.

The bigger impact was the damage done to the children, who now have no equivalent qualifications, no solid friendship groups, are isolated socially, and not really part of their extended family groups

Those children that returned to Australia, found their friendship groups had moved on (cohabiting, flats, children) and they were out of the loop. All of the adults who flitted back and forth abroad were/are selfish/self-centred people who made these move with no thought about wider impact.

No, not at all. I returned to the UK and missed many things from abroad but on the whole I'm glad I came back and I wouldn't leave UK again.

I did find it hard to re-adapt during my first year back....made harder by the pandemic and lockdowns, as I was in a new area and it was difficult to make new friends in lockdown. I also find some British attitudes odd, and there is a culture of negativity and complaining about everything in the UK which isn't a feature of other cultures. However, there are many advantages of being back home too and I'm now settled here again.

Yes. Worst decision I ever made, no question.

@RainySaturday

I did for 12 years. Came back 5 years ago. I'm glad I did, but I do despair that people here don't seem to mind being walked all over by the powers that be. Glad to be able to see family regularly.

Same as me, people seem so blind to it. But I am glad I came back, living abroad gave me a new appreciation of the UK and in the 10 years since I returned I have not regretted it.

Another no here. We returned from Sydney, Australia after nearly 3 years there. We loved it there, and had to weigh up pros and cons about moving back, but haven't regretted it. Living abroad has helped us to appreciate the UK more.

Me! I moved overseas in 2003 and came back 3 years ago. I hate it...unfortunately (due to my age now) I can't go back and do what I was doing. I'm sad about it...I was genuinely looking forward to coming 'back home' as all of my family were here, and I'd been away for a long time. Now though, I'm genuinely sad that I'm here 😢

I was raised 'abroad' and moved to the U.K. for university and stayed when I met my partner. As an 'expat' in the U.K. it's incredibly difficult to make friends and I miss my family and friends. However, there's so many benefits-I feel more at home here than in the country where I was raised (not where I'm 'from' because parents are expats too)- rife with racism, sexism, no sense of belonging, treated as a second class citizen, not actually being a citizen etc etc.

I just wish people would be more positive about all the great things U.K. has going for itself- great places to visit, natural greenery, and THE WEATHER ISNT THAT BAD!! Wish people would Just accept the weather for what it is- and just get on with life.

Other than the immense negativity, I'd happily 'move' to the U.K.

I think it really depends where you're an expat and whether you can have a similar sort of lifestyle, what things are most important to you and whether they can be replicated/replaced when you move home.

@MyOctopusFeature

Haven't read the full thread, but it just looked a bit lonely on page 4 with no responses so just wanted to say hi.

You're the first poster!

Now though, I'm genuinely sad that I'm here 😢

@DotsandCo - If it's not too personal a question, what are the things about UK that you're finding hardest? Do you think the pandemic has made things worse in that respect? And is it that the UK has changed in ways you dont like, or more that you forgot what it was like, or that now, being at a different life stage, things that didn't used to bother you are more problematic?

@TwoAndAnOnion If you don't mind me asking, what age were the children of these families when the parents came back to the UK? Presumably young adults if they don't have UK high school qualifications? Interesting that none of them decided to stay in the country where they'd grown up.