I don’t know what to do

[Desperatelytrying123]

I am really struggling and not sure what to do. My darling 6 week old baby was in the garden last week with in laws so they could meet him. My MIL held him in the sun and he got a sunburnt cheek which blistered. We took him to A and E and his burn has recovered.

I just can’t get over it. It has been weeks and I cry every day at what happened. Everytime I look at him I think about what has happened and that I have ruined his life because of the future effects of sunburn. It is to the point where I can’t even go outside. All I do is think into the future about how I don’t want to go on holidays or how I can prevent him from ever being out in the sun for prolonged periods of time.

I don’t really know what I am asking here. I just feel so sad.

Can you get in touch with your health visitor or gp. Sounds like your mental health has taken a battering

You need to get help for your anxiety. This level of worry is not normal. Your child will be fine.

Admittedly I don't know a lot about this topic but it was only once OP, I am sure your baby will be absolutely fine. Are you coping OK in general?

One bit of sunburn isn't going to have any long term effects. He'll be fine.

Admittedly I don't know a lot about this topic but it was only once OP, I am sure your baby will be absolutely fine. Are you coping OK in general?

You need to get help for your anxiety. This level of worry is not normal. Your child will be fine.

@QuestionableMouse thank you for the reassurance. It was the blister that has scared me.

@inmyslippers a battering is exactly how I would describe it.

@OrangeRug No I am not feeling okay I feel so worried for his welfare all the time.

I reckon every single parent has had an 'oh shit' moment...
Whether it's rolled off a bed /sofa..
Eaten something a bit adventurous and choked a bit (thanks blw!)...
Or been licked by a pet and us thinking baby is now germ - ridden....
Your baby is still brand new and you are still a brand new dm. They don't come with a manual sadly.
The early days are tough op. Try not to be so hard on yourself...

If it helps, a family member had this happen to them and there were no long term adverse effects. It’s fine to learn from it & be cautious in future, but please don’t make yourself ill with worry
As a pp said, have a chat with your HV who should be able to reassure you

I reckon every single parent has had an 'oh shit' moment...
Whether it's rolled off a bed /sofa..
Eaten something a bit adventurous and choked a bit (thanks blw!)...
Or been licked by a pet and us thinking baby is now germ - ridden....
Your baby is still brand new and you are still a brand new dm. They don't come with a manual sadly.
The early days are tough op. Try not to be so hard on yourself...

@VillanellesOrangeCoat thank you. How old os their child now?

I grew up in Australia until I was 9. That was 40 odd years ago now...we used to go to the beach alot, and even though my mother was on the ball about applying sunscreen, they weren't as good back then as they are now. I got burnt, badly, at least 4 times before I started school...in fact, the last time was the weekend in January - so full Aussie summer - before I started 1st grade, my back got so burnt it came up in a massive blister that took weeks to go away. If you look closely at the picture taken of me that day, you can see the neckline of the white t-shirt I had to wear under my school uniform because my back was so painful...

I've had full body checks more or less every year since I turned 21 (I was diagnosed with a completely unrelated cancer at that age). My maternal grandmother was Irish and I've inherited that very pale, very freckly skin type...I have a few moles on my back but they are all fine. I'm nearly 53 now...

Try not be scared. One incidence is unlikely to cause your child problems in the future.

I reckon every single parent has had an 'oh shit' moment...
Whether it's rolled off a bed /sofa..
Eaten something a bit adventurous and choked a bit (thanks blw!)...
Or been licked by a pet and us thinking baby is now germ - ridden....
Your baby is still brand new and you are still a brand new dm. They don't come with a manual sadly.
The early days are tough op. Try not to be so hard on yourself...

Op your anxiety seems out of proportion to what happened. Sometimes women struggle like this after giving birth and there’s great support out there. Please talk to your GP or health visitor.

@noirchatsdeux thank you for your reply. This is what I needed. I will be so careful in future but feel like I cab’t ever leave him with somebody. I am glad that you are fine and in good health.

If the consequences were bad from the burn then the A&E team would have warned you. The baby is fine and it won’t happen again. Please take care of yourself you seem very fragile right now.

[quote Desperatelytrying123]@noirchatsdeux thank you for your reply. This is what I needed. I will be so careful in future but feel like I cab’t ever leave him with somebody. I am glad that you are fine and in good health.[/quote]
Inevitably, you will find that your baby care is no more perfect than anyone else’s and you will then be able to relax more with other people. Babies are designed to survive. Aim to avoid all possible harms, but don’t beat yourself up over the inevitable mishap

@PurpleDaisies I agree with you. I have to try and live in the now. He is ok right now. I’m just finding that hard.

@PurpleDaisies I agree with you. I have to try and live in the now. He is ok right now. I’m just finding that hard.

Its natural to a bit upset but i think your level of anxiety needs addressing as previous posters have said. Accidents & small scrapes happen to the best of parents . I had v bad bubbled & blistered sunburn on both shoulders as a small child. No scars . And back then no one knew to use aloe vera gel on sunburn either. (Every chemist has it dirt cheap. Online it's expensive for some reason).

@noirchatsdeux thank you for your reply. This is what I needed. I will be so careful in future but feel like I cab’t ever leave him with somebody. I am glad that you are fine and in good health.

If the consequences were bad from the burn then the A&E team would have warned you. The baby is fine and it won’t happen again. Please take care of yourself you seem very fragile right now.

Spring sunshine can be vicious. My DS burned the tips of both his ears aged about 2-3, they blistered and I felt responsible and awful. They healed absolutely fine and he’s a pale skinned, red head of 31 who dislikes sitting in the sun.

Honestly everyone has these parental fails. Your DS will be 100% ok and you won’t let it happen again. Hard though it is you have to get back in the saddle and get out and about, this time a little more mindful of sunscreen, hats and the shade. Don’t absolutely keep him in the shade for evermore, we need some exposure to sunlight.

Have a chat with your hv and take their advice.

Best wishes, parenting can be bloody painful.