To ask: do you have an inner-monologue?

[allthatgrace]

I don't have an inner-monologue and never realised that some people do. My thoughts are rapid, abstract and conceptual rather than verbal.

For example, if I am thinking that I'm hungry and want to start making dinner it takes the form of something like: concept of hunger+concept of dinner+concept of it being the evening/dinner time. After speaking to my family members they would have an inner-voice that actually says "I'm hungry, I think I'll go start dinner".

I have also always been confused about the idea of having an inner-critic that berates you. I've never heard an inner-voice say, for example, "nobody cares what you have to say, don't bother speaking, everything you say is stupid", instead I would just feel the sensation of shyness and wanting to stay quiet.

I can make myself have an inner-voice and I will use it occasionally, for example if I'm trying to remember a particular phrase or something but my default thinking is not an inner-monologue.

Which kind of thoughts do you have?

As an aside, I once tried hypnotism (for fear of flying).

Very well though of and known hynpnotist.

I couldn’t go under. I was taking to myself in my head going “this is such a load of shit, why isn’t it working, come on for fucks sake just shut up and do it”.

He was very nice so I pretended. I ended up going through my shopping list for after and planning my hair cut. Every time I heard him turn round I’d open my eyes a bit and then shut them again to pretend I was under.

I tried yoga once too and just ended up dining half of blondies album in my head as I got so bloody bored.

Can’t meditate either. I hate going to the cinema because I can’t concentrate on the film. If I watch a film of tv at home I need a phone in my hand too, so I’m doing two things at once. Otherwise I just zone out of the film and into my own head.

I do think the different concepts but also structure of language itself and normal mannerisms and etiquette in that language effect how thoughts are expressed, how people seem to others. Does that really mean the thoughts underlying them are different though?

I think it can affect thoughts in a more basic way than that, in that the words we have for things, what they sound like and the associations they have with other words and what grammatical gender they are etc can affect how we see the actual things themselves.

There's lots of research into it. Some of the early claims about your native language actually determining what you can and can't think about have been discredited, but there's plenty if stuff it does affect. Interesting NY Times article about it here .

I love these kind of threads. The spectrum of what prior have is so diverse. We are so very different.

I don't have any berating critic. I'm glad I don't!

I wonder if some of us become more aware of the fact we're not really 'thinking in words' all the time as we get older? I'd guess that many experience occasionally not finding the word for something, or someone's name despite the being perfectly able to think about the concept or person you can't at that moment label. The correct word being 'on the tip of your tongue' may hinder communication but not thought.

I'd guess that many experience occasionally not finding the word for something, or someone's name despite the being perfectly able to think about the concept or person you can't at that moment label.

Yes, interesting point! I doubt even the most word-based of us would ever claim that we're unable to summon up a concept, person or thing in our mind without thinking the word, or never ever do it. I think I experience 'grasping' for a temporarily forgotten word more often than the average person, because of using different languages. So it's pretty common for me to be able to remember a word in one or two of my languages but be struggling to find it in the language I want!

This thread is certainly making me reflect a bit more on when I do and don't use words to mentally refer to things. Sights and physical sensations don't always get put into words for me, but anything that constitutes a 'proper thought' does, I think.

@Alexapissoff

Can’t meditate either. I hate going to the cinema because I can’t concentrate on the film. If I watch a film of tv at home I need a phone in my hand too, so I’m doing two things at once. Otherwise I just zone out of the film and into my own head.

I can't meditate. Tried numerous times but no joy. I can't silence my mind.

I love going to the cinema. I can usually manage to immerse myself totally in a film. I would never talk in a film as I am too in too it. The problem is as soon as someone in the cinema talks, rustles their sweet wrapper, gets up to go to the loo etc I lose my concentration and my mind will start thinking about other things.

I only found out recently that some people DO have an internal monologue and it sounds incredibly weird to me. I am a daydreamer and can spend hours going over past events and conversations in my head and working through possible future events but if I need the loo I don't say to myself 'I need the loo I think I'll go now' I just get up and go. Do people actually do this? Do you then say, 'I'm walking up the stairs now' and afterwards 'I'm thirsty, I think I'll made a cup of tea' and stuff like that? Don't you just do these things naturally without telling yourself to do them?

I can also completely zone out, if I'm reading a book or watching TV I'm completely engrossed and my brain is quite and if doing my hobby (metal detecting) I don't think about anything but the beeps!

This used to be comfort behaviour

This is so true for me. I grew up with an angry, over-controlling, hypercritical mother and even as a child on some level I knew that my daydreaming was due to comfort behaviour and escapism. I hated my life and I would have amazing adventures inside my head, which I enjoyed so much. Some of my happiest childhood memories aren't even real, I know that sounds tragic

I also had/still have an alter ego - a character in my mind who was me but better looking, smarter and had all the qualities in her that I wanted in myself, who would go through all sorts of strife, and I think I processed my problems through her. Unlike me she was free, wild and strong, sometimes she was a gypsy woman, sometimes a runaway, sometimes a princess etc etc. It sounds mental I know . But I think my mental fantasies stopped me from doing myself greater harm because I was very depressed as a teen especially, with massive insecurities and I did not know myself at all.

She still lives in me but not so strong these days, more like fragments of her story pass my mind most days but I don't dwell on it, perhaps because I have a bit more control of my life these days I don't need her so much?

The inner dialogue/monologue whatever you call it part stems from me never being able to express myself freely without judgement, so I started talking inside my head, "explaining" myself to imaginary people around me because I always felt criticised and misunderstood and suffocated.

All this might sound awfully tragic but actually I am grateful to have this ability because I think it's really saved me sometimes. I just wish I can write down all my stories into one amazing novel but I know in reality it would be absolute crap!

@adrianmolesmole

This used to be comfort behaviour

This is so true for me. I grew up with an angry, over-controlling, hypercritical mother and even as a child on some level I knew that my daydreaming was due to comfort behaviour and escapism. I hated my life and I would have amazing adventures inside my head, which I enjoyed so much. Some of my happiest childhood memories aren't even real, I know that sounds tragic

I also had/still have an alter ego - a character in my mind who was me but better looking, smarter and had all the qualities in her that I wanted in myself, who would go through all sorts of strife, and I think I processed my problems through her. Unlike me she was free, wild and strong, sometimes she was a gypsy woman, sometimes a runaway, sometimes a princess etc etc. It sounds mental I know . But I think my mental fantasies stopped me from doing myself greater harm because I was very depressed as a teen especially, with massive insecurities and I did not know myself at all.

She still lives in me but not so strong these days, more like fragments of her story pass my mind most days but I don't dwell on it, perhaps because I have a bit more control of my life these days I don't need her so much?

The inner dialogue/monologue whatever you call it part stems from me never being able to express myself freely without judgement, so I started talking inside my head, "explaining" myself to imaginary people around me because I always felt criticised and misunderstood and suffocated.

All this might sound awfully tragic but actually I am grateful to have this ability because I think it's really saved me sometimes. I just wish I can write down all my stories into one amazing novel but I know in reality it would be absolute crap!

@adrianmolesmole thank you for sharing this. It’s exactly me, down to the alter ego in my head abs the childhood memories, the explaining myself to people in my head.

I’ve always felt quite mad so it’s nice to see some one else has the same thing.

I don't think verbally all the time, I do however have an internal monologue/dialogue going pretty much constantly. They kind of layer up and interact. Usually with the internal voice providing running commentary on the thoughts.

@adrianmolesmole

This used to be comfort behaviour

This is so true for me. I grew up with an angry, over-controlling, hypercritical mother and even as a child on some level I knew that my daydreaming was due to comfort behaviour and escapism. I hated my life and I would have amazing adventures inside my head, which I enjoyed so much. Some of my happiest childhood memories aren't even real, I know that sounds tragic

I also had/still have an alter ego - a character in my mind who was me but better looking, smarter and had all the qualities in her that I wanted in myself, who would go through all sorts of strife, and I think I processed my problems through her. Unlike me she was free, wild and strong, sometimes she was a gypsy woman, sometimes a runaway, sometimes a princess etc etc. It sounds mental I know . But I think my mental fantasies stopped me from doing myself greater harm because I was very depressed as a teen especially, with massive insecurities and I did not know myself at all.

She still lives in me but not so strong these days, more like fragments of her story pass my mind most days but I don't dwell on it, perhaps because I have a bit more control of my life these days I don't need her so much?

The inner dialogue/monologue whatever you call it part stems from me never being able to express myself freely without judgement, so I started talking inside my head, "explaining" myself to imaginary people around me because I always felt criticised and misunderstood and suffocated.

All this might sound awfully tragic but actually I am grateful to have this ability because I think it's really saved me sometimes. I just wish I can write down all my stories into one amazing novel but I know in reality it would be absolute crap!

You and I are cut from the same cloth

The inner dialogue/monologue whatever you call it part stems from me never being able to express myself freely without judgement, so I started talking inside my head, "explaining" myself to imaginary people around me because I always felt criticised and misunderstood and suffocated.

I have intense arguments with people in my head. Stops me having the argument in real life which saves a lot of trouble I expect. But those arguments are so satisfying, I really get across what I want to say and in the most cutting way.

I can't meditate. Tried numerous times but no joy. I can't silence my mind.

It's virtually impossible to silence your mind by sheer force of will. And the effort required to even try will prevent you from achieving calm or relaxation. The guidance I read/listened to when I started learning to meditate said not to try to silence your mind at all. And not to even have that as a deliberate goal, because meditation should be about practice, not goals. Observing your thoughts, not trying to block or silence them. Eventually they quieten themselves.

so I started talking inside my head, "explaining" myself to imaginary people around me because I always felt criticised and misunderstood and suffocated.

I do this quite a lot too, but I have no difficult upbringing or critical parent as a reason for it. Don't know why I do it really!

This is so interesting

I know I hear the words when I read or write, but reading this thread I was wondering if I do actually have an internal monologue. But then I was in the garden and my voice said in my head "he just asks to go in the garden to bark!" About the dog. And I realise I actually do and I do it all the time but just don't really think about it!

What an interesting thread.

Another here with a history of maladaptive daydreaming (to escape some traumatic stuff). I can visualise anything I can imagine, as a child I used to act out my imaginary world if no one else was around. Someone earlier in the thread was talking about visualising a kettle. I could see my kettle, have me standing in my kitchen picking it up and looking at it, then as I hate my kitchen I replaced it with one I like with nice earthenware mugs to make the tea in and a wooden table - right down to the grain of the wood and how it felt when I touched it.

I still daydream a fair amount and if I'm not there is some sort of chatter in my head, stuff about the past, about the future, about now, about how that conversation could have gone better, how do I solve this problem, should I do this or that or something else, why did I do that, why do I feel like that, I need time to really think this through to understand it, no don't think like that, for gods sake just take the painkillers/get lunch/get a drink/put a sweater on, thinking about stories to write, rewriting them endlessly (rarely actually write anything down), narrating what I'm doing. On and on it goes.

I don't sleep well...

Books, if I'm engrossed, I'm there. I see it. And they shut up the internal voice, as do films or videogames if I'm into them and they're not boring me. I can also meditate, but do a lot of visualisation, or use mantras which tends to keep to keep things quieter but I sometimes find I start narrating it.

@itsfictionstupid

I had no idea people thought in sentences!!!

I was aware that other people didn't think exactly as I do, but it's really interesting to read all the descriptions of thought processes. I can't get my head round the idea of people expressing thoughts in pictures or what a 'feeling of yes or no' would be like without the words. For me it's constant words, sentences and dialogue. Doesn't matter if it's something simple like "I need a wee, I'll go up to the loo" or if I'm trying to get to grips with a really complex issue that takes me years to think about. It's always expressed in sentences.

This, to me, would be hell. How would you think about complex thoughts and concepts and feelings that there aren't words for?

@HalcyonSea - you look for the words.

Google them, invent them, read up on them.

Remember, these are internal voices, no one else is going to hear them.

I can argue with myself and see many different points of view - all with words.

[quote Gingernaut]@HalcyonSea - you look for the words.

Google them, invent them, read up on them.

Remember, these are internal voices, no one else is going to hear them.

I can argue with myself and see many different points of view - all with words.[/quote]
But voices can only express anything in words that exist, and even all of the laguagues on Earth do not contain enougj concepts to express all of human experience and emotion. So googling for words in your own language(s) is the modern equivalent of using a thesaurus. Great to express yourself better, but nowhere near describing what is actually on your mind.

It can take a novelist and entire book to try to capture one single nuance of human experience, and yet we'll still all interpret and experiennce that differently. That same is true for communicating ideas, theories, science. There is no way that limiting thought to what can be said in words cannot be limiting to the boundary of thought. I have RTHT and am still absolutely baffled. Do some people have no abstract thought at all that can't be expressed in words?

RTWT. And other typos

Do some people have no abstract thought at all that can't be expressed in words?

I don't think I do. I don't recall ever having real trouble expressing anything. And I honestly don't think that's because I only have shallow thoughts! Expressing something in words to another person is different from doing so in your own mind imo.

Part of an author's struggle is surely tailoring the words so that they convey the meaning in a way that everybody can understand. And in a way which fits with the author's style and the readers' expectations. The author has to make a final decision, and once it's in print that's it. None of that applies to thoughts in an individual's head.

I've just had a further thought though... At what point is something a feeling and at what point is it 'thoughts about the feeling you're having'? If you take physical sensation as an example, the actual sensation of pain when you stub your toe is separate from thinking "Ouch, bloody hell that hurt!". So thinking about your experience or feeling doesn't limit your experience of it, it's just a way of interpreting it to yourself.

So I'd say I don't have thoughts that aren't in words, but my sensations and feelings do exist separately from the thoughts I use to process them, it's just hard to separate them because they come together!

WT abstract thought. The thread title asks about an inner monologue which would mean words.

Abstract thoughts, feelings and so on are a different matter. I expect that, like I do, most people have many forms of those going on as well.

We are absolutely AMAZING creatures, we really are!

I have a constant inner monologue. It has chilled as I age. I did however have a run in with extreme hyperasphatia which turned out to be the beginning of psychosis

I meditate and find that over time the inner racket has quietened down. Whether it's because of the meditation I don't know, but before I started my mind was seldom quiet. Now, the only talking to myself that happens is out loud - if I stop actually talking then there is peace in my mind. I can sit and just be, and for that I am thankful.