To not get why people refuse to exercise?

[JumpingJacky]

Exercise near enough saved my life, literally, and I am evangelical about it but still people make so many excuses as to why they can’t do just a small amount, and don’t realise that they are suffering for it!

I have a relative who suffers from back pain. He spends a large majority of his day sitting. I have suggested various low impact exercises that I know through experience will help but he won’t do them while continuing whingeing and moaning about being in pain!

A friend who is overweight complains that she has pain in her knees and ankles and is finding walking hard which is stopping her doing stuff. I know weight loss is hard so I suggest she joins the gym (she can afford it and has time) to use the low impact machines to at least build some strength into her legs and get a bit fitter but she’s just not interested whilst continuing to whinge and moan!

I get it that exercise is hard and can make you uncomfortable and sweaty but for the benefits to your body that’s a small price to pay surely?

I think the main issue @JumpingJacky is your op completely lacked any empathy. Yes we all know exercise is good for us, but regular consistent exercise is hard. Especially if you suffer from injury, mh, disability.

Poacher turned gamekeeper.

@NeverDropYourMoonCup I think you’ve missed that my earlier point was to the poster who claimed google had told her all the pools in England were still shut. That isn’t the case which is very easy to verify.

The point of my OP was if you’re in pain and you know that there’s something that can help you, you can even see how it’s helped someone with your own eyes, why wouldn’t you try it instead of moaning about it?
You've got a Messiah complex, op.

I do what both my physio and rheumatologist advise.
I do not go to a gym nor do I have a pt. However I do walk daily.
I think people should do only what they are medically advised.
Unless you know someone and their medical history you cannot generalise. It is good to exercise, but many are given personal exercises which can be done at home.
I have a sheet which I work from at home and many others do the same. I never would do in front of anyone so few know I do it.
No one has any right to judge me or anyone bar my rheumatologist/physio or such.

I was just saying today id love to be one of those people who can go out for a jog of an evening or morning for that matter, but I just can't. I'm either looking after kids or working. I work 5-7am, school run then back to work 9-5, school run again, kids dinners then back to work 7-11 and then info bed. Hoping it might calm down in a few months but even then, if I exercise it means I lose the only time I see my DH of a day (and we are currently both WFH!)

@Justmuddlingalong

I walked to collect my Chinese takeaway tonight. And I only ate 5 of the 8 sweet and sour chicken balls. I know it's only little steps but I've decided to post my story in order to inspire others.

You're an inspiration to us all - thank you for sharing. Are you planning a TEDTalk? (I'm ordering Chinese now) Hahaha.

The point of my OP was if you’re in pain and you know that there’s something that can help you, you can even see how it’s helped someone with your own eyes, why wouldn’t you try it instead of moaning about it.

Yes, you did try to make that point and have been given several scenarios where exercise is not the magic cure-all and, in fact, does more harm than good. Ignoring all this and insisting that pain can be solved with exercise is really quite rude. You don't sound very educated about exercise or anatomy if you think the motion/movement of a cross-trainer is appropriate for people with pain related to joint issues etc. Definitely ill qualified to be giving out advice in any case.
You aren't morally superior because you've lost weight and move a bit more than you used to. Just because it worked for you, doesn't mean it will for others and unless you know all the minutiae of their lives, it's very unreasonable to insist that you know best.

Depression, self loathing, fatigue, shame, other people's judgement.

That's just a few reasons why people don't take care of themselves.

JumpingJacky
The point of my OP was if you’re in pain and you know that there’s something that can help you, you can even see how it’s helped someone with your own eyes, why wouldn’t you try it instead of moaning about it.

Presumably you've discussed this with the 'friend' that you're talking about? Why do you need to validate this non-information (because we're all aware of it), here?

I agree, in theory. But you can’t underestimate the mental effects of being overweight / unfit - the mind needs to be ready and quite often it’s not. That said, I do have little sympathy with people who are massively overweight and don’t take ownership of their own situation

YANBU

The average Brit walks about 3500 steps a day. A huge number of conditions can be improved with even a small amount of exercise. It’s scary how sedentary people are.

So many rude people on here

Kettle meet pot

You think it's good manners to give unsolicited, unwanted and condescending advice in real life?

You asked we're answering your query

I couldn't - and more importantly shouldn't - do the exercise you are recommending I sincerely hope you're NOT advising the person with the back issue to do such things? You're not an hcp and you're not THEIR hcp so you could very much do more harm than good.

A million other reasons people don't want to share with you?

Exactly - I hadn't initially thought of stress incontinence even though I suffer myself!

Mental illness has a major impact on ability to exercise, don't be dismissive or snarky about this. I suffer from severe ocd which has caused me to be housebound but also means I can't touch the floor, walls and only certain surfaces. I also have depression and general anxiety on top of the physical disability. I do daily physio, the programme has been formulated by a physio who specialises in my condition, which has been worsened thanks to misdiagnosis and contraindicated physio initially - so yea even hcps get it wrong!

Your attitude and advice could well - if you continue in this vein - not only NOT help the person you advise but could actually make them more ill/disabled but hey, long as you get to boast about all the exercise you're doing what does that matter?

Actually you're stating to sound like my relative with the addiction - you may want to keep an eye on that.

Tbh I just can't be arsed sometimes.

Yes, you have touched some raw nerves...but you knew you would having been there yourself by your own admission.
It was me who told you to fuck off...sorry I was rude. It was more that you said you felt entitled to be a bit preachy...that was my honest but blunt response.

No one wants to be preached at. No one.
A friend of mine shared a video of the Dali Lama giving his thoughts on ‘negative emotions’ yesterday. Pompous waffle from an arrogant man with a jabby finger. Fuck off.

Exercise is rubbish unless it’s incorporated into our day and it doesn’t feel like effort or you do it with friends. I run regularly but only enjoy it afterwards when I feel smug or when I’ve run with friends and we’ve had a great chat.

www.amazon.co.uk/Miracle-Pill-Ha-Peter-Walker/dp/1471192520/ref=asc_df_1471192520/?hvlocphy=1006689&linkCode=df0&hvptwo&psc=1&psc=1&hvnetw=g&hvadid=463119489030&hvpone&hvlocint&th=1&hvpos&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl&hvqmt&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&hvtargid=pla-973652719667&hvrand=1294468795995997480 book is great and is more encouraging about exercise - it talks about how society is set up so that it’s difficult to get natural movement eg walking to places. Then we wouldn’t need bloody exercise classes.

JustMuddlingAlong

I walked to collect my Chinese takeaway tonight. And I only ate 5 of the 8 sweet and sour chicken balls. I know it's only little steps but I've decided to post my story in order to inspire others.

I’ve just polished off a large vege supreme pizza with rum and raisin ice cream for dessert. It was delivered and I ate it all but good for you.

sergeilavrov

Astonishing that you have such an uninformed perspective on mental health: not only is it often impossible for people suffering from issues like depression to exercise, but after a point - exercise can actually worsen your mental health. It's belittling to suggest mental health problems disappear when you go for a job, for many people it's not so simple -- and comments like yours are extremely harmful. Not to mention the number of EDs which can be triggered by reengaging in exercise.

Now where did I say that MH problems disappear when you go for a jog? I don’t jog or run. Don’t accuse me of saying something I haven’t said . I’ve had lifelong depression and an anxiety disorder so know quite a bit about MH thanks. That’s how I got to 18 stone with high blood pressure and the hypothyroidism didn’t help.

The thing I notice about people who achieve a certain level of fitness is that they seem to have an element of amnesia about where they started from and how it felt during the process of getting there.

I have fibromyalgia. I exercise, I go to the gym (if anyone asks, I do a mixture of weights and cardio, i.e. step, rowing machine etc.) and I walk a lot and am hoping to swim as well, but it leaves me in agony on bad days and can trigger a flare. I've had terrible leg pain after walking long distances, or back pain as well - I got sciatica from deadlifting - and no, exercise does not make it better unless it's low impact stuff like yoga/stretching. It doesn't mean I'm going to stop exercising but some people do have a legitimate reason to not exercise. I've had to walk out of boxercise classes due to being in a ton of pain.

Mumsnet can be absolutely fucking shit about disability sometimes and this thread is an example. Also, preaching at people is going to piss them off.

I nearly started a thread the other day asking if everyone goes to the gym and exercises. I started a new job during covid which is office-based and really different to my previous active job where I was regularly walking 10,000 steps a day. I have never exercised really, just gone for the off leisurely walk, apart from a brief 6 month gym membership many years ago which was included in my wedding package!

In my new sedentary job I find it really odd that 90% of my colleagues go to the gym or run/cycle/do classes. None of my previous colleagues, and barely any of my acquaintances, exercise "formally" so it's all a bit alien. I do keep thinking I should probably join a gym but I don't even know how they work. I find the concept of going for a run weird, like do you just step out of your door and run? It's seems very odd to me.

I know it would help me to lose weight and it may well help all the pain I am in with hyper mobility issues but I am in so much pain from a badly sprained ankle 3 months ago that I can barely walk let alone exercise. When I am in a lot of pain (which is often) my doctor actually said that trying to do exercise was pointless when I have already used all my energy just functioning whilst in pain. Pain is exhausting

I’ve just polished off a large vege supreme pizza with rum and raisin ice cream for dessert. It was delivered and I ate it all but good for you.

You’ll be heading back up to 18 stone in no time at all OP

@JumpingJacky

JustMuddlingAlong

I walked to collect my Chinese takeaway tonight. And I only ate 5 of the 8 sweet and sour chicken balls. I know it's only little steps but I've decided to post my story in order to inspire others.

I’ve just polished off a large vege supreme pizza with rum and raisin ice cream for dessert. It was delivered and I ate it all but good for you.

sergeilavrov

Astonishing that you have such an uninformed perspective on mental health: not only is it often impossible for people suffering from issues like depression to exercise, but after a point - exercise can actually worsen your mental health. It's belittling to suggest mental health problems disappear when you go for a job, for many people it's not so simple -- and comments like yours are extremely harmful. Not to mention the number of EDs which can be triggered by reengaging in exercise.

Now where did I say that MH problems disappear when you go for a jog? I don’t jog or run. Don’t accuse me of saying something I haven’t said . I’ve had lifelong depression and an anxiety disorder so know quite a bit about MH thanks. That’s how I got to 18 stone with high blood pressure and the hypothyroidism didn’t help.

Why didn't you exercise before that?

A born again [insert subject] is a really annoying twat lacking in self awareness.

I was being sarcastic, I don't need a "good for you", thank you.

OP how did you motivate yourself to start? What kind of exercises did you do at the beginning/what was your daily routine?