Would you judge someone for rehoming a puppy ?

[puppynomore]

Someone I know got a puppy a few months ago and finds it too much hard work, so looking to we-home puppy.

Thoughts?

I do think people underestimate the time and effort involved in having a dog. I did ! We got an adult rescue, lovely nature but completely untrained. I had grown up with dogs and thought I knew what having one involved, what I had failed to notice growing up with them was the hours and hours my Dad put into training them so they would walk to heel with no lead, had 100% recall, were calm and happy household family members. It was a very steep learning curve

People completely underestimate the effort a puppy takes and how exasperated you feel when you’ve done all the training and hit 8 months when it all goes out the window. We have a 10 month old and he’s amazing but we knew he’d be a lot of work. He’s been very good for Dh who is working from home and dc are all school age so we can afford doggy day care if we need to. We planned everything but I can’t imagine everyone else would do this much prep.

[quote puppynomore]@FizzyApricot I ask because a while ago there was such a nasty thread on here where someone had given up a puppy and the poster was a friend of this person and no longer wanted to be their friend because they gave the puppy up. I wanted to understand if that's how people feel about giving up puppies or if that was a bit extreme. [/quote]
I have kind of dropped a friend because. of this. They got a cocker spaniel puppy when they had a 1 year old and 3 year old, 6 months later they realised they did not have time for this energetic dog who barely ever got walked and definitely not socialised. 2 years later, they had a 5 year old, a 3 year old and pregnant with number three, and they decided to get another puppy. I tried to convince her not to, but they went ahead with it anyway. That dog didn't even last 6 months in their home. I just couldn't be friends with her after that. She's stupid.

I would judge them for getting a dog they couldn't commit to caring for in the first place.

My friend had a dog rehomed to her in the first lockdown - baby and a toddler and two adults trying to WfH in a tiny flat, something had to give. Did I judge those owners? Well no, because they couldn't have predicted a time that all five of them would be stuck within four walls trying to manage the tiny children/dog interface while also making work calls and dealing with a pandemic. They did the right thing.

'Friends' who live semi-rurally but cba to train their dogs so they've rehomed two of them in the past 5 years? Oh I judge them and I judge them hard. See also ppl who got lockdown puppies and are now hand-wringing about the fact they need to leave bored adolescent dogs alone at home all day. Hard. Judge. But still, it's better that they rehome than keep a miserable dog.

I would judge them for going into it without thinking through their circumstances, size of their home, ages of their current/planned children, the costs to fully insure etc, the commitment needed for training and any potential behaviour problems with a living animal.

I wouldn't judge them for rehoming responsibly when it went wrong. Which means not selling or giving away to anyone. Give it back to the breeder they bought from (assuming they bought from a responsible breeder), or handing over to a rescue to rehome who will properly check the next owner.

I’d only judge if they didn’t make damn sure it went to a good home.

Not for rehoming a dog, but would judge people who get a dog who work full time leaving dog at home all day.

All about context. Firstly, I'd be pleased that they admitted it and did the right thing by the dog - too many people would be even worse and not even compute that they couldn't cope, and just happily give a dog a miserable life so they could keep their fluffy instababy.

Secondly, if I didn't know their circumstances I wouldn't judge a bit. People make mistakes all the time.

If I DID know the circs it would depend! Flaky friend in a one-bed flat who gushed over getting a cutie puppy to help with lockdown 'the kids have been begging me!' -? - JUDGE HARD! Someone with the space, the time, who'd done their research but simply found that they'd misjudged, that actually the reality was completely different, the dog wasn't a good fit, they'd tried very hard to make it work? - no judgement.

It depends on the situation ... DM got a dog a few years ago and coped fine with her, she was elderly and didn’t need much except cuddles and a comfy seat and a few gentle walks a week .

She died very suddenly and mum was bereft, lonely and in hindsight - very ill - but I couldn’t see that, and without my knowledge she organised getting another dog . Neighbour dropped off a cross bred dog that was clearly the runt of the litter; tiny, very poorly looked after - terrified . Have actually rung RSPCA and reported it since .

I think mum tried for a good six months with her before my aunt intervened - it wasn’t working at all - and the puppy was taken to foster home for training . I do think of the wee dog often and hope very much that she’s better cared for now and having a lovely life - she would have made a lovely wee dog for someone .

Can’t judge mum as she was so bloody ill I don’t think she was thinking straight . I do judge myself for not ringing charities there and then but it’s not always so simple in reality .

I think I'd rather see the puppy rehomed with someone who can handle it and give it a good life than be living with a owner who might become resentful of it because they can't cope.

The current arrangement does nothing for the dog or owner.

Yes, I do judge rehoming puppies. It is not rocket science and one tiniest bit of research allows anyone to understand that puppy requires hard work and dedication.

Having a dog requires similar levels of attention as having a toddler. People buy these pups ( often supporting dubious breeders and immoral practices) find the pup does not fit their lifestyle ( one Google search would have given sufficient information) then traumatise the animal by rehoming often having created behavioural/ anxiety issues in the process.
Don’t buy a dog/ puppy unless you can give the dog 14 years, spend at least two years training, many hours walking, many more hours cleaning up after it/ your home and ensure your dog is happy, healthy and not a pita for other non doggy people.

It’s really simple, they are animals not toys... stop buying dogs on a whim.....

Yes, I would. There's so much information about how much time and effort you need to put in to raise a puppy and keep a happy dog, and I do wonder why people who have obvious barriers to be able to do this get a dog in the first place. A dog is a living creature, not a plaything to be passed on because the owners didn't think through the obligations as well at the rewards.

But I would judge more harshly someone who did not rehome a dog when they realised they could not cope, and agree that the sooner the better before any behavioural issues become entrenched. Sometimes the best option is responsible rehoming (unless you know someone directly who you are sure can be a good owner, then surrender through rescue who will assess potential owners, don't just advertise online)

Harshest judgement of all for a repeat offender.

But no judgement whatsoever for those who have had one of the strokes of bad luck in life that mean they can no longer keep their dog (bereavement, serious illness etc). Sometimes it's heartbreaking, but they put the dog first.

Happens all the time. Rescue centres have quite a few puppies inc ‘designer’ ones. They go off to new homes and settle well.

I would definitely encourage taking to a rescue centre. A puppy will not linger there. I've been checking 7 centres daily for last 11 months - there have been only 3 0-6 months pups in that whole time, and they were took off site within 24 hours due to number of applicants. Unfortunately most unwanted pups are up for sale as people trying to get their money back. I always rescue rather than pay breeders - unfortunately due to age of my child this time, rescue centres are ruling us out for nearly all adults they have. I do judge for lack of foresight - but not for rehoming thoughtfully.

I wouldn't judge them for rehoming, and think the sooner the better if it's not working out.

But I would judge them for getting a puppy in the first place without adequately researching what having a puppy entails, and ensuring that they were able to meet its needs.

I can’t say I wouldn’t judge a bit - mostly that they clearly hadn’t done enough research or put enough thought into the whole dog ownership thing in the first place. It’s not hard to understand it’s a commitment for more than a decade with a fair bit of lifestyle compromise.

But I’d be pleased they’d recognised early that they couldn’t give the dog a good home and if they rehomed responsibly (back to the breeder or to a trusted rescue organisation) then I wouldn’t think badly of them.

But yes - if they got another dog after that I would probably judge rather more.

I would judge them for getting a puppy without doing the proper research.

I would be more sympathetic if they had to rehome as their circumstances changed beyond their control and in an unpredictable way (not including having less time due to going back to work when Covid restrictions lifted, realising that puppies need more than a few days training or blaming missing out on dog training sessions due to Covid as these are all predictable things where a sensible person would have postponed or decided against getting a puppy if they felt unable to train the dog themselves).

That said it would be worse not to rehome where they clearly can't take care of the dog whether or not they'll be judged.

I would lose a lot of respect for someone if they rehomed then bought/adopted another puppy in the near future or if they had done this with dogs/other animals in the past.

I think taking on a puppy is a big commitment and shouldn't be done lightly so I am a bit judgemental! If there is a really good reason I understand but a lot of people rehome because they they realise dogs needed house training etc. My friend got a dog a few years ago and their cat, which she loved, upped and left and moved in with their neighbour. No attempt to get it back. They since had a child and now she's desperate to get rid of the dog and has decided actually she never liked dogs she just thought she did. I just felt it was very cruel to treat first the cat and then the dog so badly. They aren't toys. It also made me think If she has a second child the first will probably fall out of favour now something shiny and new has come along. Hopefully not, but the evidence is stacking up!

I would, because of the reason you gave. People drastically underestimate the work dogs need and then get rid because they're too difficult. It's not fair and people should do their research first. If the dog was to then showcase additional needs such as aggression or anxiety that was an issue of safety then no I wouldn't.

Lack of research and reality tho

No, it’s not for everyone and until you have experienced it, you don’t know if you’d be any good at it.
We took on an older dog just before lockdown, having never had a dog before, and you know what? It’s hard work!
In our case we can cope, but I can see it might be overwhelming for others, and if it had been untrained, I’m not sure I would have had the patience or the time to persevere.
We are focused on giving our lovely rescue the best years of the rest of her life, despite owning a dog being a real tie (although Covid has eased some of that by preventing us from doing things we would normally do - like 3 - 4 short breaks abroad a year). One thing that is crystal clear though, is that we will not take on another unless our circumstances change in later years.

I'm on the fence.

On the one hand, I'd feel they didn't put enough thought into it beforehand, especially people who got lockdown puppies and didn't think how it would be once everything got back to normal. On the other hand, at least they acknowledge they can't manage and if the puppy is still young there shouldn't be any long term trauma. It's best the puppy then goes to a forever hone where it's needs are met.

Personally, I can't imagine giving up my dog. I can never say never as I don't have a crystal ball, but we love her so much, she brings us such happiness and there is such a strong bond between us. But obviously if my husband died and I became disabled or something I'd have to consider what is best for her.

Not a puppy but relateable, I had to re-home a kitten a few years ago, firstly she was supposed to be male but she was a female, my other cat hated her, the kitten was so stressed she couldn't be litter trained and peed and pooed everywhere, we had her for 3 months and it just got worse and worse so with a heavy heart I re-homed her to a lovely lady. I've been called irresponsible for getting her in the first place (I've had a lot of cats and never done that before..) but things just weren't working out for any of us. I figured it was better to re-home before she got any older as it was less likely to affect her. Sometimes things just don't work out and it's best to re-home the animal to a loving and more appropriate home.

What type of dog is it?