Worst dates you've ever been on

[Sweetaddiction88]

Was having a good laugh thinking of some of mine and also interested to hear others' experiences.
Went on one once with a man who turned up 45 minutes late without good reason (I had just left him a voicemail saying that I was leaving) when he walked in.

Looked much older than his pictures, refused to tell me his age when I asked him and instead started banging on about 'objectivity and subjectivity' and sat extremely close to me. I had an 'emergency' and left.

Another one told me at the start of our date "oh btw, I'm moving to Australia next month", talked constantly about himself, was incredibly cagey about what he did for work and where he lived, started talking about his "wife", then claimed it was an ex and that they were never married but that he referred to her as his wife.
Then suddenly remembered he had "forgotten" to pay for a belt the day before so could we go and pay for it, so we had to get a bus there and on the way he seemed to know absolutely everybody so we had to keep stopping. I left, then got a random text from him 2 weeks later asking if i preferred classical or hip hop music?

Another one who turned up in a suit for most dates including the cinema, smoked Camel cigarettes and absolutely reeked of them, I told him that I taught English to unemployed people and for some reason he found this hilarious and laughed hysterically.

Quite interesting experiences
Would love to hear other stories.

@Overwhelmed245

I once went on a date age 22 we where meeting for a coffee. He turned up head to toe in grey tracksuit with his cousin and then after half an hour said he had to leave because his mum was on her period and wanted her tummy rubbed for the pain.

That's the weirdest thing ever!

I was early 20s. He was about ten years older. We met OLD.

Had a reasonably nice, if short, first date over coffee.

He decided he wanted to take me out on my birthday.

We went shopping. For shoes. For him. For seven hours. I was bored rigid standing around in Selfridges Manchester watching him try on pair after pair of £600 shoes.

I ditched him, went home and cried. Biggest waste of a birthday ever.

Got the phone number of a lady I'd been chatting to at 3am the previous Saturday, details of her very hazy. I text a few days later asking her out, which she agrees to. I choose a large pub to meet in which was central from where we lived.

She walks in and it turns out she used to live sound the corner from the pub until recently and was one of the locals. So all the other locals kept coming over to say hello or joining us at the table to chat with her. There was nothing exciting about her or the date so i made my excuses and left after a couple of hours as she was more occupied with chatting to others. She apologised when i left and said we'd do a proper date, we never did

From where are these creatures spawned

Are you a journalist?

Had a few dodgy ones, the guy who I'd been chatting to for a while, during the first date (nice Thai meal, all going ok) casually said he'd been clubbing the previous weekend. Me - oh so what sort of music are you into/what sort of club? Him - well I feel I can tell you anything so here goes...it turned out to be a latex/fetish swingers type club. Umm...

Then there was the chap who (first actual in person meeting) had been telling me all about the nasty breakup from his ex, how it had royally fucked him up etc. This was before we'd even got to main courses. He got up to go to the loo, my phone pings, message from date telling me 'he couldn't tell me in person as he was too nervous but he just knew I was the one'. Longest meal ever.

Then there was the one who I didn't even realise I was on a date with (context I'd been made redundant, former colleague asked if I would like meeting for lunch as he had lots of contacts as he was a freelancer so had worked for many companies in the area that I was qualified for) me thinking oh that's nice, might be a bit awkward as we had never really interacted that much at work. Anyway, I thought it's only a quick lunch during a weekday. He very promptly went on to basically ask me to be his bit in the side and could we take this to a local hotel for the afternoon. Wtf! Also for some context he was married, four children and about 20yrs older than me and shorter than me (I'm only 5'6!). No no and no

That was to the op.

I have posted about this loads over the years as it still haunts me. Unfortunately, I was the odd date in this scenario, although not intentionally.

I met a guy at a gig and there was a real attraction. We went on one date and things were going really well, so I invited him to mine for dinner for our next date.

I made my signature mushroom crepes with jacket potatoes and veg. I wanted to appear feminine so I thought the way to do this was to not eat very much. I was early 20s at the time. So I dished up a much bigger meal for him than me.

Anyway, we sat down to eat and he was being a bit weird. I was chatting away trying to ignore his obvious discomfort. I then looked down and thought, ‘why do I have TWO jacket potatoes?’ I then looked at his meal and realised to my horror that I was eating the great big meal and I had given him the measly little one.

The thing is, I should have said something. But I said NOTHING and just carried on eating.

I never saw him again .

I went on two different dates and both of the guys kept desperately going on about his exes,how much they loved them and misses them and want them back.
One of the date the guy actually said that she the Ex will be walking past the coffee shop window soon where we sat. Apart from that he was going on about a duffel coat he bought recently and he kept asking if I like it and told me how much it cost him and that his dad paid for it actually as he had no enough money. Wtf.
I left.

When he surprised me on the 3rd date by introducing me to his brothers, aunties and cousins at a family party that I thought was just a pub date.

Also I remember a date with a guy who apparently fancied me for ages and was a customer in my shop. He always seemed so polite and nice.
As soon I split up with my boyfriend, he asked me out.
We walked in a town for while talking sweets things and when he walked me home he took his penis out and said if I can stroke him Good night!
I was horrified really as he seemed like a church boy.
I refused and grabbed my hand and forced it on his dick.
I managed to run away. Never seen him since that.

I meant * I refused and HE grabbed my hand..

A few who turned up for coffee dates and expected me to pay for them. I never did. One got really pissed off. 'You mean you're not going to buy me a coffee?' No. And a couple who progressed to dinner, ordered drinks, starters, expensive mains, desserts, fancy coffees whilst I had something much cheaper and then wanted to split the bill. I never did. 'Nice try to get a meal subbed, chancer. Nope. We pay for our own.'

Met a guy at a party, delicious looking and very friendly, down to earth. I gave him my number. He called 3 days later, invited me to a pub for a drink. All good, put on the matching ‘date’ underwear, and set off. It was a very stormy night, and the pub was hard to find, but hey ho.

Arrived at the pub and the bartender asked me if I was ‘Nit’ and gestured to the stairs. I thought it was a bit strange, but assumed there were multiple bar areas. No. It was a room designed to be hired out to local businesses. My hunky date was standing by a butcher’s paper easel, surrounded by sales materials, in a badly fitting suit. He launched into a MLM spiel. I was too shocked to stop him for at least 7 minutes.

As I came to my senses and started to explain pointedly how not-impressed his stunt had left me, a door (to living quarters?) opens and HIS GIRLFRIEND stalks in. She starts yelling at him ‘I told you it was a stupid idea, Jason!’. I hightailed it back down the stairs.

The bartender- no lie- had a shot of spirits on the bar for me. He didn’t have the balls to look me in the eye. I downed the shot, and put the glass in the bin on the way out. No idea why.

Weirdest date ever. Probably dated a few wrong’ uns after that, on the strength of it just being less weird than MLM guy. I was hot back then too. Confident and beautiful. Completely nuts situation!

Working my way through these posts and loving the experiences which make mine pale into insignificance ( I know it isn't a competition!) but while sure I have blotted out some of my own cringeworthy ones, one of my earliest dates as a teen was with a lad I fancied rotten. He asked to take me out one Sunday afternoon for a walk and I was so nervous but said yes. He was polite and pleasant enough but kept sniffing repeatedly. I pretended not to notice but eventually he said oh god I am going to have to blow my nose. He produced a man size hanky from his back pocket and then blew his nose with such force I just wanted to run away. It put me off him completely and I endured the rest of the "date" and made excuses not to see him again. Shallow of me I know but as a teen venturing into the world of boys and dates I think I had a more romantic view in my little head.

Ahh internet dating my worst one was when on a second date listening to him go on about fishing, he told me the biggest fish ever caught weighed the same as me.. when I said 'oh, you know my weight?' A little confused, he proceed to (in public!!) look me up and down and guess my weight, going UP by half a stone each time!! He got to about 3 stone heavier than I was when I told him, and he then said
'Oh.. you don't look that light. You must have light bones'

Same guy in the car to the cinema then told me about the axe he kept in the boot for anyone who tried to steal his tiny Peugeot. Then there was nothing on at the cinema so we went back to his shared house (I've learned to be more assertive since this time!) and I had to spend a very slow 2 hours pretending to be interested in this awful boring bloke film, because the alternative was giving in to his constant requests for me to lie down with him.

On the way finally out, he hung onto me from behind with his arms around my waist, but wouldn't let go so I had to waddle with him like that all the way to the door and peel him off me.. never again!!!

I'd been talking to someone online and when we finally met he had totally misrepresented himself (used old photos) and arrived wearing jogging bottoms and a tshirt full of stains. We'd just ordered drinks when he announced that we'd have to leave the venue because of 'the negative energy'. At the next venue (just across the road) he started telling me all about the magic of water and how amazing it was. It was all a bit weird!

I went on a double date once, half way through he told me he didn’t fancy me and was only interested in my friend.
I left after I deposited my drink all over him...
Prick!

On the way finally out, he hung onto me from behind with his arms around my waist, but wouldn't let go so I had to waddle with him like that all the way to the door and peel him off me.. never again!!!

OH! I have had this too! That made me giggle. I think it is a man thing because I doubt a woman would do it. Hilarious.

The first time I visited my now husband he had cooked a meal for me. Inexplicable it consisted solely of parsnips ....which he had burned. So we ordered Chinese

Oh god you guys have brought up bad memories for me if a TERRIBLE and bizarre date I went on in my late teens.

I met a guy in a club, he was tall and quite good looking. Seemed normal enough. We exchanged numbers and arranged to meet in a few days for, what I thought, was a drink. I met him on the high street and he was about 15 mins late and it was raining so I got soaked. He didn’t explain his lateness and he only lived down the road!

As soon as I met him is asked if I would come to Argos with him as he needed to get something. Weird but I said OK. He went in and purchased a new expensive laundry basket while I waited. When we left I thought we were go to the pub next door but he insisted that he couldn’t because he needed to take the laundry basket home and would I come with him as we could have a drink there. I should have left obviously but I was young and naive.

We went back to his and spent about and hour trying to put this complicated laundry basket thing together that was more like a piece of flat pack furniture. I said I think I should leave soon and he walked slowly over to his TV and put on a dvd of.........hardcore pornography! I could t believe it! I left and he seemed confused at what he had done wrong! He used to text me for ages afterwards too. I have no idea if he thought that the poem would turn me on or what.

Where do these weirdos come from!!
.

First date. 19 years old. Quite romantic. Candle on the table etc.

Anyway, he reached for the bottle of water but knocked the candle over which set fire to my paper serviette. He then tried to pour my glass of water over it but soaked me instead. He then jumped up in a sort of panic but tripped over his chair and went crashing down , bashing his nose on the table causing it to bleed all over his white shirt.

Being a student nurse, I picked him up , checked he was OK , sorted his nose bleed and asked the waitress for a linen napkin to tuck in his shirt , bib like , to cover the blood stain. I said something about a wet T shirt contest and told him to stop apologising. Everybody in the restaurant clapped and we didn't have to pay for anything. It was a warm summer's night, he made me laugh, and I dried-out quite quickly. I felt we had a connection.

We've been married for 20 years with three kids. I occasionally remind him to be careful of the candle on the table. He's still lovely.

@pyewackect You get the prize for the loveliest worst date story. So sweet.

Pre internet days, a friend set me up on a blind date.
Every time he spoke, his mouth did a weird thing, a bit like Jim Carrey in scream, and every word he spoke was about his beloved mother!
I lasted one vodka before making the excuse that I needed the loo while he got another drink for us, and legged it.
I often wonder how long he sat there before he realised that I had done a runner.

I went on a date with a guy who asked me if I liked insert Chinese racial slur food. I got up and left the restaurant.