Sister-in-law Nickname for me

[cinemacurious12345]

My sister-in-law let slip that her and her boyfriend sometimes refer to me as a gross skin condition because it sounds similar to my name. I actually changed my name to that voluntarily because of negative connotations with my birth name. She's actually a therapist so I was shocked she even told me this. AIBU that this bothers me? It feels mocking and mean spirited and I feel they've been laughing at me behind my back. I do wish she'd just not told me - they could have had their fun and I'd never know.

@MzHz

How on earth did you find this out? How did she tell you?

yeah it slipped out - accidentally I think but she didn't seem to particularly care lol

@Oneeyeopen

That’s a very immature and nasty thing to do.

My dh put weight on when he was at a low point in his life. His db delighted in telling dh that their df had remarked that dh was fat.
It really hurt dh.
The jokes on him now though as dh is slim again and dbil has put lots of weight on.
However, we don’t mention his weight because we’re not that unkind.

and that's called being an adult lol

That's so mean of her. I also have a condition I feel is gross and am self conscious about it. I can't imagine people who are in my life taking the piss! I hope they never tell me if they do.

Worrying for a therapist, however referring to gross skin condition isn't exactly kind either. There could be lots of readers wondering if you would think they were gross due to their condition.

@MaskingForIt

YABU for “gross” skin condition. How do you think people with skin conditions are going to feel being described by gross? You sound as grim as each other.

Exactly!

Good suggestions upthread. And sorry, but my inner child is now racking her brain coming up with potential names.

Verruca/Veronica?
Scabies/Amy?
Ulcer/Una?

🤔

(No offence intended to anyone with veruccas, scabies or ulcers.)

What’s her name? We could give you one for her?

That's awful of her

But also please think of people who might have a skin condition and don't call it gross in future. As that's un kind too.

@MaskingForIt

YABU for “gross” skin condition. How do you think people with skin conditions are going to feel being described by gross? You sound as grim as each other.

Thank you. I was hoping someone had said this.

OP of you think it's hard having a name that sounds a bit like a skin condition try living with a skin condition and having people describe it as "gross".

@SpiderinaWingMirror

That's horrible. All the more because you chose your name. Worra bitch

My SIL did the same to me when I changed my name. I told her over the phone & she said, "That's a beautiful name," & I thought for once she was going to be nice.

But then she said, "I should have a nice name like that," & she asked me what I was going to shorten it to. I suggested an attractive shortened version which I actually pinched off an actress (& still use to this day). "No, no, that's no good," she said (!!), & she suggested a stupid, ugly, male version of my beautiful new name. I just said, "No."

But I wondered afterwards if she referred to me using this horrible name she'd come up with. I didn't care because I rarely spoke to her because she was always like this.

OP, I'm sorry you've had this too. Enjoy your name & don't think about her. I feel sorry for her clients.

It might not be malicious.

We do tons of weird play and it's not mean to be mean, but if someone's know had a name that rhymed with a skin condition we'd probably call them that.

For a laugh, yes, but not laughing at the person. Unless they had that skin condition which would definitely affect things.

@moofolk

It might not be malicious.

We do tons of weird play and it's not mean to be mean, but if someone's know had a name that rhymed with a skin condition we'd probably call them that.

For a laugh, yes, but not laughing at the person. Unless they had that skin condition which would definitely affect things.

I'm sorry, but that's horrible. You may find it funny, but it depends how the person you're ridiculing feels about it. And very often, it doesn't cut both ways: person A calls person B an unpleasant, unkind name, but woe betide person B if they should do it back.

@moofolk

It might not be malicious.

We do tons of weird play and it's not mean to be mean, but if someone's know had a name that rhymed with a skin condition we'd probably call them that.

For a laugh, yes, but not laughing at the person. Unless they had that skin condition which would definitely affect things.

It might not be meant to be mean. But the person hearing the message might find it mean.

Yeah I lost sympathy at the "gross" part, too. Whatevs 🧟‍♀️

‘Wow. When faced with bitchiness like that some people are going to need a therapist. I hope they don’t get a bitchy or a shit one....’

Soraya Psoriasis is my guess @Puntastic

"Gross skin condition" is pretty offensive OP

After that I would have to make it a point to secretly call her a unflattering name as well! Very bitchy of her!

Acne /Agnes ?

What is her name and the Bf . See what we can come up with.

@Cosmos123

What is her name and the Bf . See what we can come up with.

Yes, yes this!

Esther/ Eczema?

Just tell her you think it's not on, and you're surprised a therapist would need telling.

Just tell her you don't agree with bullying.

Alopecia - Elisha
Chlamydia - Lydia/Olivia
Gonorrhea - Leah
Herpes - Haylee/Penelope
Melanoma - Melanie
Syphilis - Phyllis
Scabies - Hailey

@lottieproject

Yeah I lost sympathy at the "gross" part, too. Whatevs 🧟‍♀️

Yep!!

Seriously? You come on here looking for pity for your hurt feelings over being called a name, and then call people with skin conditions that have actual reasons to be triggered gross?

Maybe she makes fun of you because she thinks changing your name is pretentious and obnoxious (and stupid).