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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to challenge my paper-stealing neighbour?

202 replies

Thingaling · 28/04/2021 15:24

I have a newspaper subscription I pay a fair bit of money for, which gives me digital access during the week and then the actual weekend papers delivered.

But for months now, I have only been receiving Saturday papers maybe twice a month and Sunday papers only once a month. The rest of the time they “disappear” before I can collect them from the entrance hall to our mansion block.

Two weeks ago, I saw my Saturday paper there (which has a label with my name and address on it) in the morning on my way out to the corner shop. When I came back ten minutes later, it was gone.

Armed with this intel, I asked the building security people to look at the CCTV for that ten minute window to see who had taken the paper.

It turns out that the thief lives in the flat above me - a normal looking woman, AFAICT from a non chaotic household. I don’t know her to speak to although I’ve talked to her husband before about water pouring into my flat from their broken loo and he seemed perfectly pleasant.

The security people (somewhat reluctantly) agreed to speak to her - basically saying we’ve seen you on camera doing it, just please stop. She apparently denied it then went mental “Are you accusing me of being a thief?” etc and then claimed she also had a subscription and thought it was hers (although we’ve never seen another paper delivered to our block, ever).

Security are now saying there’s nothing more they can do. AIBU to be really really cross about this? The brazen cheek of her!

Short of getting up at 5am to grab the paper as soon as it’s delivered, what else can I do? ?

OP posts:
harriethoyle · 29/04/2021 12:47

I'm quite invested in this OP - why don't you pop a generic note through the thief's door saying "Dear neighbours (thus making them think you've sent it to everyone), unfortunately my paper delivery keeps being stolen from the communal hall. Security have CCTV and I will be reporting to the police and asking them to review the same - if you have had a similar experience and let me know so I can give you my crime reference number if you want to link any complaint to mine." See if that stops it...

or just actually go to the police. We complained about someone blocking the private road to our house recently and because we had photo, reg number etc they were round like a rat up a drain pipe, and presumably ticked it off as an easy collar! CCTV will make it a breeze for them.

Thingaling · 29/04/2021 13:53

cheers @harriethoyle

Saturday will be the big test. If it goes again, it’s war.

OP posts:
Thingaling · 29/04/2021 13:57

@acovic good idea

Security are backing off from this big time now...the perp is not easy to deal with and they see this as “only a paper”.

The Mgt Company (their employers) may see things differently however...

OP posts:
Viviennemary · 29/04/2021 14:02

Put up a sign saying you are having a collection to buy x a subscription to x paper. As they keep stealing yours. And leave a bowl out.

steppemum · 29/04/2021 14:16

[quote Thingaling]@acovic good idea

Security are backing off from this big time now...the perp is not easy to deal with and they see this as “only a paper”.

The Mgt Company (their employers) may see things differently however...[/quote]
well, I would add up how much money it is worth.
Our Sunday paper costs £2
If you are talking 3 x per month for months then that is a lot of money.

I would put this in writing, to the management company and security.
Total up how much money it has cost you, and say that the postal delivery is inadequate as there is no secure way of getting your post.

I would also write to the woman taking it, with the same total, and tell her that there is security tape of her taking your paper, that over the last 6 months you have lost over £50 worth of papers, and you will be taking it to the police if you lose even one more paper.

ottersnowsun · 29/04/2021 15:43

Oooh so what's the deal with perp number two being 'difficult' as a newcomer to the building? What else have they done?

LookItsMeAgain · 29/04/2021 16:37

[quote Thingaling]@acovic good idea

Security are backing off from this big time now...the perp is not easy to deal with and they see this as “only a paper”.

The Mgt Company (their employers) may see things differently however...[/quote]
Today it might only be a paper, tomorrow it might be a birthday card with a gift card in it or someone's replacement credit card/bank card.

The management company needs to step up.

What's to say that the parcel that went missing wasn't taken by some opportunistic resident who just happened to be there at the time that the parcel/package was being delivered and was only being 'helpful'???

LookItsMeAgain · 29/04/2021 16:39

Also, as @steppemum has pointed out, it's not just ONE newspaper, it's regular daily deliveries of newspapers and this is costing YOU money. It's theft, pure and simple.

Thingaling · 29/04/2021 21:28

@ottersnowsun

Oooh so what's the deal with perp number two being 'difficult' as a newcomer to the building? What else have they done?
Good q... so I don’t know all the juice as I am not au fait with all the street drama but as I understand it, the council sold the flat last year at a knock down price on behalf of a very infirm elderly lady who had been made a ward of the state. The buyer was the perp. Her very first action (which did not endear her to anyone) was to demand her legal right to a coal shed, which was enshrined somewhere in the lease she had bought. She kicked up a disproportionately huge fuss and was —pretty— very rude to the custodians and management company about it. She weirdly also seems to inhabit another flat in a different block about 300 yards away. There is some suggestion (by the custodians) that the perp might have a newspaper subscription for the other flat and that she “forgets” which flat she is in when she steals mine. To which I say, total BS - this woman is a liar, thief AND a bully.
OP posts:
jacketdrama · 30/04/2021 09:54

I'm quite invested in this as I've always fancied living in a mansion block. Please OP post nice and early about the weekend papers! Grin

Thingaling · 30/04/2021 10:11

@jacketdrama

I'm quite invested in this as I've always fancied living in a mansion block. Please OP post nice and early about the weekend papers! Grin
I have spent the last 20yrs living in two different mansion blocks so I feel fairly expert on the pros and cons... happy to answer any Qs!

The main con is the service charge - ours is about £7k a year which believe it or not is low... some blocks round here charge £15-20k pa. Main expenses are lifts and porters/security.... plus major exterior works. The key is to pick a well managed one - a bad management company is a world of pain.

OP posts:
jacketdrama · 30/04/2021 11:09

Sadly @Thingaling it is just a fantasy. I occasionally go on RightMove to choose my latest favourite, but most are well out of my price range, even if my Premium Bonds hit the jackpot one month. But they do sound (and usually look) lovely.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 30/04/2021 11:49

Goodness, for those prices, they should throw in a complimentary newspaper subscription - and deliver it personally to your door each morning on a silver platter!

Seriously, though, they can't just keep taking the money for providing the security and other services and then just decide it's too difficult to provide them, but they'll still have the cash anyway, thanks. I wonder how they'd react if you didn't pay one month and told them that 'it doesn't really work' or made an excuse about they're probably mistaken that you should be paying them.

CuriousSeal · 30/04/2021 12:19

I need to know how this ends! Shamelessly placeholding...

Nanny0gg · 30/04/2021 16:00

@CuriousSeal

I need to know how this ends! Shamelessly placeholding...
You can add threads to a Watchlist you know...
scaredsadandstuck · 30/04/2021 16:17

Some kind of glitter injection has got to be possible surely. Might involve you staying up half the night to intercept the paper delivery. Do you think you could use a Calpol syringe the do it. That would only need a small hole in the wrapper.

Also WTF does she need a coal shed for?!

SpacemanDad · 30/04/2021 16:30

Chances are now that someone's had a word and made her aware there's CCTV she'll not do it again

StoneofDestiny · 30/04/2021 16:37

I'd put a note in her mail box saying you know she is stealing your papers and if it doesn't stop you will report her as a thief.

The management company should instal a CCTV camera at the Mail station (you pay enough service charge for it)

I'd get down early and superglue the outside packaging - she will get caught with it in her hand

StoneofDestiny · 30/04/2021 16:38

Sorry - forgot you had cctv

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 30/04/2021 19:17

Also WTF does she need a coal shed for?!

It does sound like a strange thing to latch on to, but if she has a home and also another 'holiday home' less than a mile away, she's a bit of an odd one. Is it like a proper full-sized shed that she can use for garden/outside storage or just a scrappy little lean-to thing?

She might just be one of those people who will doggedly pursue any possession she possibly can, just for the sake of it, regardless of whether she needs or even wants it.

SylHellais · 30/04/2021 19:58

@CuriousSeal

I need to know how this ends! Shamelessly placeholding...
Have you noticed the bookmark button? It takes you straight to the post you bookmarked without needing to ‘shamelessly placemark’. I thought everyone knew this by now.
StoneofDestiny · 30/04/2021 20:37

Where is the bookmark button out of interest

SylHellais · 30/04/2021 20:51

@StoneofDestiny

Where is the bookmark button out of interest
If on an iPad type device, move your finger over the bottom right hand corner of the post and a bookmark button will appear.

If on a PC, move the cursor over the same place and click on it.

I don’t know why MNHQ don’t make it appear constantly rather than only when you hover over it but whatever. It’s particularly useful on a fast-moving thread because it avoids it getting filled up prematurely by people posting to placemark.

TinaTurnoff · 30/04/2021 21:08

Previous poster suggested editing your address to add in a few very descriptive lines - great idea. Note taped to the post table alerting all residents to addressed deliveries going missing - also great idea. Tape a copy of a previous address docket to the table with your name/flat number brightly highlighted might also help. I’m very invested in this Smile

SpringtimeSummertime · 30/04/2021 21:08

Place marking. I want to know what tomorrow brings...

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