to challenge my paper-stealing neighbour?

[Thingaling]

I have a newspaper subscription I pay a fair bit of money for, which gives me digital access during the week and then the actual weekend papers delivered.

But for months now, I have only been receiving Saturday papers maybe twice a month and Sunday papers only once a month. The rest of the time they “disappear” before I can collect them from the entrance hall to our mansion block.

Two weeks ago, I saw my Saturday paper there (which has a label with my name and address on it) in the morning on my way out to the corner shop. When I came back ten minutes later, it was gone.

Armed with this intel, I asked the building security people to look at the CCTV for that ten minute window to see who had taken the paper.

It turns out that the thief lives in the flat above me - a normal looking woman, AFAICT from a non chaotic household. I don’t know her to speak to although I’ve talked to her husband before about water pouring into my flat from their broken loo and he seemed perfectly pleasant.

The security people (somewhat reluctantly) agreed to speak to her - basically saying we’ve seen you on camera doing it, just please stop. She apparently denied it then went mental “Are you accusing me of being a thief?” etc and then claimed she also had a subscription and thought it was hers (although we’ve never seen another paper delivered to our block, ever).

Security are now saying there’s nothing more they can do. AIBU to be really really cross about this? The brazen cheek of her!

Short of getting up at 5am to grab the paper as soon as it’s delivered, what else can I do? ?

I hope you are not paying for those security guards, because they sound about as useful as a chocolate teapot.

I might actually get up at five AM for a few weekends, hide around a corner, and leap out shouting, "PUT MY PAPER DOWN!" Bit of a PITA, but her face would be SO worth it!

How about making up a "security warning" flyer and deliver it to every flat in the block, including the thief. It could ask neighbours to be extra vigilent as there has been a spate of reported petty theft of mail and other items in the block and that there currently exists cctv evidence of certain residents "acting suspiciously" near the mail boxes. No official action has yet been taken but further reported incidents will involve the footage being released to the authorities.

Or words to that effect.

That way you put the thief on warning without even accusing or confronting her. You also inform other residents that there is a thief in the block and everyone will be watching everyone else. The other residents are honest but the thief is not. She will know she has been rumbled and is "on warning". That should make her wary and paranoid putting her under pressure. If she is sensible she will not risk it again.

@memberofthewedding

How about making up a "security warning" flyer and deliver it to every flat in the block, including the thief. It could ask neighbours to be extra vigilent as there has been a spate of reported petty theft of mail and other items in the block and that there currently exists cctv evidence of certain residents "acting suspiciously" near the mail boxes. No official action has yet been taken but further reported incidents will involve the footage being released to the authorities.

Or words to that effect.

That way you put the thief on warning without even accusing or confronting her. You also inform other residents that there is a thief in the block and everyone will be watching everyone else. The other residents are honest but the thief is not. She will know she has been rumbled and is "on warning". That should make her wary and paranoid putting her under pressure. If she is sensible she will not risk it again.

Cunning plan, I like it! Lets everyone else know that someone is taking stuff that isn't theirs, very good!

It's very poor that the security don't live up to their name. If you have their head office number, it might be worth phoning them to find out how much they have in the way of "teeth" - i.e., how far are they allowed to go to ensure that such thievery is put a stop to.

As far as the police are concerned, I would have thought that having cctv footage of a clearly identifiable culprit would be enough for them to take action - an easy resolution! - but sure, they just might not bother themselves either.

I've often thought that this is a real vulnerability with postal (or similar) deliveries to buildings with multiple households. I lived in one once (in a different country) and, although nothing got stolen, you got some nosey neighbours looking over your post and commenting.

It's not fair for you to not have the same right to privacy/security as people at single-household addresses. I really don't understand when you get set-ups like this: nobody would ever expect you to have to collect your mail from a (covered) table outside the building, where any passer-by could steal it, but there's this bizarre assumption that everybody inside the building - including those you've never met (or those you know to be thieves) will be honest, just by virtue of the address they happen to live at.

You need decent-sized individual locking mailboxes - with good, secure locks on them. Even if it's a newsagent delivering the papers, they can still use them - they usually stay unlocked until somebody puts something in, turns the lock and then only the person with the key can retrieve it - and it shouldn't interfere with RM deliveries (i.e. the postie won't be faced with an already-locked box when they have mail for you) if it's at the weekend, and very early at that.

Hopefully, she'll now be ashamed enough to stop, but you never know when she or somebody else might start up again. Also, it will be a constant reminder to her every single time she sees the mailboxes that they were only installed because she is/was a thief.

Our (service-paid-for) garden waste bin was 'borrowed' by a neighbour once - they took it after it had been emptied, kept it for two weeks in their back garden and then put it out full, in front of our house, early on the morning of the next collection day. The next day, I got some thick white paint and painted our house number massive on the front of all of our hitherto-unnumbered bins. It was hardly crime of the century, but I figured that, as well as hopefully solving the problem, it would be a constant reminder every week a bin went out and they saw it, knowing why it now had a massive number painted on it. Ironically, they're actually really lovely neighbours and we get on well. It was really out of character for them. We rarely put it out full and would gladly have let them stuff it to capacity, if only they'd asked (or even just done so in-situ, after we'd put it out, without taking it from us for a fortnight).

I suspect these papers come sealed in plastic so you couldn't put anything into them. I think a flyer put up by the mail saying that things are going missing is a good idea.

I also really like the security warning flyer idea. Of course, after the first one, there's nothing to stop you from making up irritatingly regular reminder ones addressed to 'Dear Resident', but only putting them through her door. In fact, don't put it all the way through - leave it half hanging out. That way, if she gets wise to the fact that nobody else is getting them, say "Oh dear, the mail thief must have been stealing them from all the others - so glad that yours got to you safely, though...."

It's not mail. It's a paper delivery.

It will come direct from the publisher - ie in the mail. Mine does.

I kept my word and warned the other neighbours. Every time Im expecting a package I put a notice on my door. "Please bang loudly. Do not leave at no X - not honest"

I'd be very careful about this - it could constitute harassment or even slander.

@SchadenfreudePersonified

It's not mail. It's a paper delivery.

It will come direct from the publisher - ie in the mail. Mine does.

It may also be a paper delivery from a newsagents. We simply don't know. In any case it's not a "serious offence". It's nicking a paper.

@freecuthbert

OP if you live in the UK, please don't boobytrap the newspaper with glitter as it's actually illegal here. I remember reading about it when people were boobytrapping parcels to catch thieves. Ridiculous but true. Obviously leaving a stern note is a different matter, but something tells me she won't care. I would definitely confront her!

So it’s illegal to put glitter in your own newspaper? Doubtful but even if it is, so what, it’s not as if they can call the police on you.

Security have spoken to her, she knows she has been caught. Honestly, I think she will stop now.

If she doesn't, you need to continue making it their problem because this is literally part of what they are paid to do. If they don't want to get involved further, you need to make it more hassle for them to do nothing than to do something- keep chasing them and complaining to their manager.

They probably don't get paid well and can't be arsed. Tough.

It may also be a paper delivery from a newsagents. We simply don't know. In any case it's not a "serious offence". It's nicking a paper.

At what point does theft become serious, then? What if it was the postie himself/herself guessing that your mail was a birthday card and opening it to see if there's any cash in there that they could relieve you of?

'Nicking' is a minimising word, like when people nudge you and grin about their new acquisition that 'fell off the back of a lorry'. Can I help myself to bikes or lawn mowers from people's gardens and sheds, as long as I tell myself it's 'scrumping' rather than theft?

It's not as easy as just getting to the paper first. I have a paper delivered every day and it turns up any time from. 230 am onwards. Plus, presumably, Op has the papers delivered for convenience.

Good luck Op, this would drive me mad!

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

It may also be a paper delivery from a newsagents. We simply don't know. In any case it's not a "serious offence". It's nicking a paper.

At what point does theft become serious, then? What if it was the postie himself/herself guessing that your mail was a birthday card and opening it to see if there's any cash in there that they could relieve you of?

'Nicking' is a minimising word, like when people nudge you and grin about their new acquisition that 'fell off the back of a lorry'. Can I help myself to bikes or lawn mowers from people's gardens and sheds, as long as I tell myself it's 'scrumping' rather than theft?

It's not the value of the item - though theft is theft - it's INTERFERING WITH THE ROYAL MAIL.

THAT is what is so serious.

Any interference is considered serious.

Hid and catch her in the act.

'Nicking' is a minimising word, like when people nudge you and grin about their new acquisition that 'fell off the back of a lorry'. Can I help myself to bikes or lawn mowers from people's gardens and sheds, as long as I tell myself it's 'scrumping' rather than theft?

Precisely, Sausage.

Whether someone pinches a stamp or the Crown Jewels, they are a thief. It's just the magnitude of the crime that differs - not the fact that is it a crime - How cheaply will a person sell their integrity so that they can tell themselves they are still honest?

Hopefully she will stop now she's been warned, but if she does it again, I'd write in red marker across the front "Stop stealing my paper, you bitch. You're on CCTV and the footage will be passed on to the police". I mean it's not true but hopefully it will scare her enough to stop.

[quote freecuthbert]@TaraR2020 I know it sounds so ridiculous! But I saw it crop up multiple times on the r/legaladviceuk subreddit about glitter bombs, and basically it seems that if the glitter got caught in someone's eye or they were allergic or their pet swallowed it or caused damage or even just causing them a plain nuisance, then technically it's a crime and you could get done for it. Unlikely something the CPS would see worth pursuing but still a possibility. It's the same principle as boobytrapping food in the office you suspect is being stolen etc.[/quote]
How could it possibly be a crime to put glitter in your own newspaper? You have no idea someone else will take it.

If security only just talked to her then hopefully this weekend she'll resist the temptation. I think her BS about having a subscription was just a face saving excuse as well.

If you still feel concerned though, you could put a sign up in the entrance/common hallway are where the papers are dropped. It could say something like:

"Only take a newspaper if it is addressed to you. There has been an ongoing problem of papers being taken before the rightful owner can claim them. This area is covered by CCTV."

It may also be a paper delivery from a newsagents. We simply don't know

It's a mixed digital/paper subscription arranged direct with the newspaper. It won't be coming from a newsagent's.

ctually I just tweaked my sign message:

"Only take a newspaper if it is addressed to you. There has been an ongoing problem of papers being taken before the rightful owner can claim them. Security is aware and monitoring the situation. This area is covered by CCTV."

Someone in my village recently had a parcel taken off their door step by a local resident. All caught on the Ring camera. Police were actually quite interested. I guess it’s still theft no matter what the cost and over time it mounts up. Hopefully now she knows she’s been caught she’ll stop but if not go to the police.

Placemarking. Looking forward to perp being caught. What a CF!

I would wait and see if she stops now that she knows it's been noticed before doing anything else.

If it doesn't stop, try the signs/ flyers and confront her directly just saying you think there is a misunderstanding and please can she double check on the newspaper who it is addressed to before taking it.

I'm not sure where you go from there if she carries on - police unlikely to be interested in such petty theft - I guess you keep taking it back to the building security and complaining until they do something?

What a pain though - it's not like a newspaper costs a lot - she should just get her own!