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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think she should have done a test and sent her kid in?

56 replies

Rainallnight · 27/04/2021 23:16

DD’s friend in school didn’t come back after the Easter holidays, until yesterday.

Her mum told me that she (the child) had a temperature but she didn’t want to do a Covid test as she didn’t want to ‘stick something up her nose’, so she kept her home to self isolate for a fortnight instead.

Am I wrong in thinking this is bonkers? Kids have missed so much socialisation and school this year already, why would you keep them off for longer when it could be sorted with a 48 hour test??

The child has no SEN or anything

OP posts:
Original poster
Rainallnight · 27/04/2021 23:17

And, sorry, to clarify, the mum didn’t want to do the Covid test on her daughter because she (the mum) didn’t want to have to stick anything up her daughter’s nose.

OP posts:
DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 27/04/2021 23:22

Lots of people have problems with the testing.

She didn't want to do it for whatever reason, but was sensible about her actions after making that choice, so she didn't risk anyone else's health 🤷‍♀️

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 27/04/2021 23:27

She didn't want to do the test which is her decision. Would you rather she'd sent her daughter in without a test?

rainbowthoughts · 27/04/2021 23:29

Am I wrong in thinking this is bonkers?

Yes. You are in the wrong to think anything at all tbh. This is nothing to do with you.

MordredsOrrery · 27/04/2021 23:33

She had the choice of testing or self-isolating. She chose the latter. YABU.

If she'd just sent her DD in without either then you'd have a point.

Ireolu · 27/04/2021 23:54

Just because you would do things differently doesn't mean what she chose to do is wrong.

Covidworries · 28/04/2021 00:01

Some children can find testing difficult. You may think there isnt any SEN but the child could have sensory issues, sinus problems, medical anxiety.

WorraLiberty · 28/04/2021 00:01

It's no big deal in the grand scheme of things.

Most kids have been home schooled for the best part of a year. Another 10 days isn't going to make any difference.

Mehoooole · 28/04/2021 00:13

What's 'bonkers' is that she has to make this choice in the first place.

Pleasegodgotosleep · 28/04/2021 03:23

When my LG was 4 weeks old she developed severe bronchiolitis, she was in ambulance on route to hospital when she stopped breathing and was resuscitated at the side of the road. She spent days in HDU on a cpap macine. I regularly had to hold her still while tubes were forced down her nose so her lungs could be suctioned. It was awful and as a result she has continued breathing problems and I have v bad anxiety about her health. She's now almost 3 and recently needed a covid test, there is no way I would have been able to do it so DH had to. I still feel guilty that I didn't do it but my MH would not have stood the triggering of flashbacks it would have caused. You just don't know what that mum has going on, try not to judge.

Marchitectmummy · 28/04/2021 04:13

YABU absolutely nothing to do with you.

itsgettingwierd · 28/04/2021 04:55

Actually she's one of the sensible ones .

Far more community spirited than the ones who keep them off for a day and send them back as they just had a temp for a day and "it probably wasn't COVID" or the worse ones who send their kids in whilst waiting for the kids results or someone in the family.

I'm not bothered by testing but if she really didn't want to do the swab at least she isolated.

lunar1 · 28/04/2021 05:07

She made one of the two available choices to parents in this situation, she didn't put anyone at risk in the process.

OwlBeThere · 28/04/2021 05:49

I dunno, I think she should have tested because without a positive test none of the kids contacts have had a chance to SI, so it could cause a mini-outbreak.

romdowa · 28/04/2021 05:53

I'm a grown adult and I cannot stand having things put up my nose or back my throat. I'd really struggle to do it to a child

MrsTerryPratchett · 28/04/2021 05:53

The child has no SEN or anything

Why do people insist on writing this? You don't know. The parent may not even know. Diagnosis is slow and sometimes doesn't happen, especially in girls.

I bet most of DD's friends' mums don't know she has a SEN.

beginningoftheend · 28/04/2021 06:25

I think yabu and too judgemental.

Costaheaven · 28/04/2021 06:28

Completely her decision which route to take, as long as they follow guidelines one way or the other- it’s none of your business.

Hollyhead · 28/04/2021 06:31

I’ve tested my 8 year old once. He found it so distressing that if he has a symptom again I won’t be testing him. And he’s too big to physically restrain.

ShadierThanaPalmTree · 28/04/2021 06:42

I don't see what it has to do with you at all. It doesn't impact you, she has kept her child at home to make sure that she isn't endangering anyone else. I would presume that she has her reasons.

newnortherner111 · 28/04/2021 06:52

Mixed feelings- good to read of someone taking Covid 19 risk as still there and thinking of not spreading it to teachers, pupils and anyone else. However, there are difficult things in life that everyone has to face to some degree. and does avoiding them help create a 'snowflake' child/adult?

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 28/04/2021 06:54

None of your business. Keep your big beak out.

apooagnuandyou · 28/04/2021 06:55

Before social media, WHERE did people gossip and bitch about others like that? Or is it true that internet made people believe their opinion matters and they should vent it publicly?

You should be very grateful the mum followed the rules, it's so rare, and its' all for your own child benefit. HTH.

CovidCorvid · 28/04/2021 06:56

Is the mum and everyone in the house also self isolating? If so I don’t see any issue. Up to them. But yes, personally I’d have tested as I think kids have missed enough school already.

grapewine · 28/04/2021 06:58

Nothing to do with you. She made the choice as a parent thatsshe decided was the best one for her child. YABU.