Mother offering to pay for Weight Watchers for me

[Wejustliveinayellowsubmarine]

First time I’ve seen my parents in months because of the lockdowns we’ve had and one of the first things they did was prod my tummy and say “what’s this?” Bearing in mind I’ve been extremely stressed with a 2 year old at home for the best part of a year. I’ve been trying to eat lower carb, but my hormones make me bloated too and I do struggle with exercise on my own, I lack motivation and I just dislike it generally.
They’ve always gone on about my weight, especially since I moved out and can make my own meals etc. They constantly compare me now to when I was a pre teen and teenager and very slim.

Anyway, my mum has offered to pay for weight watchers for me. Am I right to be really offended?

I actually thought both of them looked fatter than when I last saw them too, but I didn’t say anything because I felt it was impolite and unnecessary.

Yanbu for being pissed off with them but you missed a genuine tit for big arsed tat moment, there.

Don't be upset. Realise you were the one who was polite therefore your so much better than them. However overweight you could be no one has a right to talk to you like that, just laugh at them. You are better than they will ever be !!

Haha how funny! That sounds a bit misguided. But do you want to go to weight watchers? If you do, jump at her kind offer. Maybe you could go together. If not decline and dont feed any dramas.

Thanks for all the replies. I just feel quite humiliated and hurt by it I think.

@MrsPsmalls

Haha how funny! That sounds a bit misguided. But do you want to go to weight watchers? If you do, jump at her kind offer. Maybe you could go together. If not decline and dont feed any dramas.

It's not funny, misguided or a kind offer. OP is hurt and it was downright rude.

Yanbu but yabu not to point out their weight gain

Good god they are rude.
I have struggled with my weight for over 20 years and I dont need anyone to point out that I am fat.
However I am now working on my overeating as being the problem and the weight being the symptom- I'm working through a book by Gillian Riley . The phsycology is very interesting .

The bit that would concern me is comparing you as a teen to now. You are older and have had a baby and of course your body is going to be different. How much weight do you need to lose? Tbh if you want to lose weight it has to be something you do for yourself and not other people or it won't work.
And poking your stomach is incredibly rude and I would let them know that.

I lost weight recently and it was something I did for me and my health

Seriously, what sort of doormat doesn't say "what the actual fuck?!" When someone prods their stomach and tells them they're fat??
They must have really done a number on you.

I guess I need to start standing up for myself, I just told them I thought they’d put on weight too, it got completely ignored, as I suspected it would.

God, I'd have poked her tummy right back.

Not only is it uncalled for, but it's unwelcomed touch.

It used to give me the rage when people grabbed my pregnant belly. Always considered grabbing theirs right back but usually it took so long for me to pick my jaw up off the floor that the opportunity had gone.

Tell your parents to find a nice spinny office chair and swivel.

Sorry for being blunt earlier, but yes you certainly need to start working on your self esteem and boundaries with your parents.
If you feel off in yourself and exercise would help, have a frank talk with your partner about making some time for you.
Early toddlerhood is bloody hard, you're not alone in putting weight on and feeling shit. There is definitely light ahead of you in that tunnel.
With me it started to ease when I really made a conscious effort to look after my skin. 10 minutes before bed was it. Moisturiser, face mask. I felt so much better in myself when I didn't look like a dehydrated crispy dry thing and then small changes with diet came after. It'll all follow on. Good luck 🤞🏼

My mum and dad (but especially mum) have a thing that thin = good and fat = bad and lazy

I love thos idea that anyone would be doing you a favour by pointing out that you've gained weight. As if you wouldn't know. Is there a single woman in the western world that isn't painfully aware if they're above their "ideal" weight?

My mum and dad (but especially mum) have a thing that thin = good and fat = bad and lazy.
That's awful above all else you're their DD how dare they base your self worth on the size of your waist.
You do need to stand up more they'd learn how important you are if you stopped visiting.
Why would anybody want to visit for abuse and stares.