Pronouns

[fizzycokezero]

I'm being asked to state my pronouns on my email at work. I don't really want to do this but I don't really have a good enough rationale. Am I wrong not to do this? Can someone just give me a sensible non contentious reason that I can say for not wanting to do it?
Thanks

There is research to suggest that when women draw attention to their sex, they are disadvantaged- unconscious bias, sexism, veiled (or explicit) misogyny.

We've had this at work too and I've just ignored it/ not put mine on. It's obvious from my name how I identify and I don't feel the need to include it on my email signature.
So fed up of all of this!

Back in ye olden days... I used to go clubbing on gay clubs. Gay men calling others ‘she’ was when they were being catty, rude and dismissive (‘will you take a look a that - who does she think she is?’).

Definitely the word queer was never ever used (even in an argument).

@melj1213

I thought the whole point of encouraging everyone to put pronouns into their social media/emails was so that it became normalised.

A lot of trans/non-binary people were putting their preferred pronouns in their SM/emails which was basically signposting the fact that it was a thing of relevance and was making them stand out regardless. People started putting their pronouns in to normalise the process - if everyone puts their pronouns in emails/SM then nobody stands out negatively by highlighting theirs due to necessity.

I have no issues with people knowing my pronouns and am happy to put them in my email/SM if it normalises the practice, and if it was to affect levels of sexism/discrimination then I would rather deal with the sexism rather than the use of pronouns.

But asking people to declare their "gender identity", which is what "preferred pronouns" is asking, further solidifies sexism because tackling sexism involves dismantling gender! The notion that anyone "has" a gender is what underpins sexism, it underpins arguments about what's natural or acceptable for men and women to do or look like or wear. Gender is a social construct, a set of culturally specific rules about what is acceptable for people of each sex. I don't subscribe to the belief that someone is born with a "gender" any more than I believe that women are genetically predisposed to wear pink or men are born needing to watch football. Regressive nonsense.

I'll pop that on my email sig

My pronouns are ... irrelevant to the way in which I do my job.

@TheCraicDealer

I had an email today, sent only to my very-obviously-a-woman [email protected] email address, starting with "Dear Sirs". The sender had they/them pronouns.

The hypocrisy of falling back on inherently sexist conventions such as "Dear Sirs" whilst drawing my attention to and asking me to respect their particular gender identity is still annoying me twelve hours later tbh. It really just proves to me it's all absolute bullshit.

Ffs! I'd love to be shocked but sadly I'm not

@melj1213

I thought the whole point of encouraging everyone to put pronouns into their social media/emails was so that it became normalised.

A lot of trans/non-binary people were putting their preferred pronouns in their SM/emails which was basically signposting the fact that it was a thing of relevance and was making them stand out regardless. People started putting their pronouns in to normalise the process - if everyone puts their pronouns in emails/SM then nobody stands out negatively by highlighting theirs due to necessity.

I have no issues with people knowing my pronouns and am happy to put them in my email/SM if it normalises the practice, and if it was to affect levels of sexism/discrimination then I would rather deal with the sexism rather than the use of pronouns.

Don't want to make you feel attacked melj1213 - but your last para does sum up one of the more unsavoury aspects of prizing fake 'inclusivity' without giving a thought as to who is getting pushed off the other end of the bench. In many cases, the scenario will be: woman puts pronouns in her signature, faces more sexism, all in aid of appeasing people who don't like to be reminded that you can't always shape the world to suit the individual. But what social reward is actually going to come out of this semi-coerced sacrifice? Sexism is just being further normalised. And this is not a community, women are not being looked after in return here.

I ignore it. I have fantasised about a hard Paddington stare.

melj1213
I thought the whole point of encouraging everyone to put pronouns into their social media/emails was so that it became normalised.

A lot of trans/non-binary people were putting their preferred pronouns in their SM/emails which was basically signposting the fact that it was a thing of relevance and was making them stand out regardless. People started putting their pronouns in to normalise the process - if everyone puts their pronouns in emails/SM then nobody stands out negatively by highlighting theirs due to necessity.

I have no issues with people knowing my pronouns and am happy to put them in my email/SM if it normalises the practice, and if it was to affect levels of sexism/discrimination then I would rather deal with the sexism rather than the use of pronouns.
But asking people to declare their "gender identity", which is what "preferred pronouns" is asking, further solidifies sexism because tackling sexism involves dismantling gender! The notion that anyone "has" a gender is what underpins sexism, it underpins arguments about what's natural or acceptable for men and women to do or look like or wear. Gender is a social construct, a set of culturally specific rules about what is acceptable for people of each sex. I don't subscribe to the belief that someone is born with a "gender" any more than I believe that women are genetically predisposed to wear pink or men are born needing to watch football. Regressive nonsense.

I'll pop that on my email sig

Brilliantly put @Notagain20

I’m not in this situation so please excuse me if I’m being insensitive but aren’t “I, thee, and you” pronouns. What others would you need writing an email to someone?

Thou?

I’m going with Mma/Rra (been listening to No1 ladies detective agency).

In Shakespeare's time thou had connotations of scorn and derision- used for social inferiors. You was used for your betters.
I'm happy for any prating peevish pander to use old English pronouns out of my presence. However, if I get a thou to my face I shall bite my tongue at thee, Xir!

Used you* for betters.
Thou scurvy simple sot of a spell checker.

Somebody
Nobody
Everything
Nothing

Or did they specifically state personal pronouns.