Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be irritated by people who bang on about where they’re from

311 replies

Notfromthevalleys · 25/04/2021 21:18

Couple of women where I work will NOT stop talking about how they’re from The Valleys (south Wales)
“Haha it’s the valley girl in me”
“Haha you can tell I’m from the valleys”
“You can take the girl out of the valley but you can’t take the valley out of the girl”

There is nothing remotely different or valley-esque about them as far as I can see, other than the fact that they keep harping on about the valleys as though being from there is some sort of pedigree.

There’s also a bloke who will not shut up about being a “Swansea lad”.

Is it a south walian thing?

I am from mid Wales and we all work in mid Wales so not like they’re a million miles away from home.

It’s like the Oxbridge people who name drop their college all the time. That’s annoying too, but I at least it’s a genuine achievement to go to Oxbridge.

I understand that people’s community and identity is important to them, but there’s just no need to bring it into everything.

Anyone else come across this and AIBU to let it grate on me so much?!

OP posts:
disconnected101 · 26/04/2021 17:13

On a slightly different note, is downplaying being southern English a thing?
I'm Irish (born n reared, don't feel the need to go on about it especially since my accent gives the game away, with a normal human tolerance for alcohol) and find the regional differences in England interesting.
I'm reminded of the most recent series of University Challenge and there was one English bloke in a team from a Scottish uni. He made a point about not being Scottish / being the token English bloke / honorary Scot EVERY single time they did introductions. It was annoying! Ok, you're not Scottish, you are English, but he seemed almost embarrassed by being (Southern) English. I don't imagine he would have suggested he was a bit Scottish because he lived & studied there, if he were a Proud Professional Northerner.

disconnected101 · 26/04/2021 17:15

Actually, with an ever decreasing tolerance for alcohol with every advancing year. Curse you, two-day hangovers.

KizzyMoo · 26/04/2021 17:23

My colleague drones on about all the different states she has lived in in America, how they are all so different bla bla bloody bla.

goose1964 · 26/04/2021 17:33

I'm from South Wales and use the phrase,whose coat is that jacket, and now in a minute. I don't harp on about it though.

SignMyStookie · 26/04/2021 17:38

@Paletteofcolour

The fish and chips in Leeds were okay once I learned to refuse the offer of "scraps". WTF is that all about? Confused

It's a regional word, not all regions use the same words. No real need for the wtf and confused emoticon.

Not in the least bit arsed over the word scraps, or confused by the use of a regional word. Rather not have a load of left over batter dumped all over my delicious looking fish and chips though.
SignMyStookie · 26/04/2021 17:48

@ViciousJackdaw I think I did pay for them as well 😂 There was no mention or question of whether I wanted them or not, I actually thought that's just how they were served and politely picked off as much as I could. Eventually MIL pointed out that they were in fact optional.

ShagMeRiggins · 26/04/2021 18:04

@Wabe

I mean, if someone is banging on about ‘my Oxford college’, that’s pretty tiresome, but is anyone going to be saying, ‘When I was at New/Pembroke/Blackfriars...’?
One word: Balliol

This was in Colorado (USA) in a professional work setting. “When I was at Balliol...” was often dropped into conversation.

The team was largely American and had no idea that Oxford had colleges, let alone that Balliol was one.

Luckily there were another dozen or so Brits on the project who enlightened us, took the piss relentlessly, and Balliol boy eventually stopped after about a decade

Weirdly, I’ve ended up in an Oxbridge location and often hear one’s college dropped into conversation. It’s never “I remember when I was at university...” it’s far more often “Well at Magdalen, we...”

It is definitely ‘a thing.’

wheresmymojo · 26/04/2021 18:11

As soon as someone says where they're from in these posts I read the rest of the post in that accent...

Tealightsandd · 26/04/2021 18:13

@Novelusername

There's nothing worse than Americans asking you if you're from London because that's the only place in the UK they've heard of, then attempting to do a British accent (ie. Cockney) by imitating Dick Van Dyck and expecting you to find it even vaguely original or funny. I would retaliate by asking them if they're from Alabama, (especially if they're clearly from New York) and then doing a redneck impression "now wait just a cotton-picking minute there, Billy-Bob!" And do it over and over again and see how hilarious they find it.
The first time I was in America, when people heard my London accent, they kept asking if I was from Australia! Except for the one who asked if I was from Liverpool and started going on about the Beatles. I didn't mind - they were all very friendly welcoming people - but I was a bit bemused because I don't sound Australian.
Wabe · 26/04/2021 18:16

Well done on shutting up Balliol Boy. Grin

How do you mean an 'Oxbridge location', though? I think if you're living and working somewhere, it would be more natural to use local references? I'm trying to think if I were living in Oxford whether I'd be more likely to refer specifically to my old college, because it might be more relevant, eg 'When I was living in [College] housing on X Street, it was so cold I had to take baths wearing a woolly hat.' Whereas I live in another country these days, and certainly college names would only be recognised by other people who went there. (Apart from Balliol. Grin. No one ever died of the glamour of St Hugh's...)

Tealightsandd · 26/04/2021 18:16

@disconnected101

On a slightly different note, is downplaying being southern English a thing? I'm Irish (born n reared, don't feel the need to go on about it especially since my accent gives the game away, with a normal human tolerance for alcohol) and find the regional differences in England interesting. I'm reminded of the most recent series of University Challenge and there was one English bloke in a team from a Scottish uni. He made a point about not being Scottish / being the token English bloke / honorary Scot EVERY single time they did introductions. It was annoying! Ok, you're not Scottish, you are English, but he seemed almost embarrassed by being (Southern) English. I don't imagine he would have suggested he was a bit Scottish because he lived & studied there, if he were a Proud Professional Northerner.
Yes definitely some people downplay it. It's because they don't want to get accused of being a 'poncey stuck up southerner' for the crime of being from the south.
indiakulfi · 26/04/2021 18:18

@randomer

What is the culture of the valleys?
Yoghurt Grin And sheep.
Paddingtonthebear · 26/04/2021 18:25

The Welsh valleys have a rough and ready reputation (I have never been but I worked with people based there who told me that themselves so that’s all I know!)

ImAllOut · 26/04/2021 18:34

@randomer

What is the culture of the valleys?
Steroids, fake tan and being a bit stupid. Probably about 50% accurate in my area Grin
MarieIVanArkleStinks · 26/04/2021 18:34

I can't say that it bothers me. But the constant British fixation with social class really does grate. Cf. interior decor or garden decor threads, plus overuses of the word 'classy' and 'tacky' are an instant cue. As for chav, don't even go there.

As an aside, never, ever say 'North Humberside' to a Yorkshire person. They get really mad. Like - REALLY mad!

MarieIVanArkleStinks · 26/04/2021 18:37

PS. is it bread roll or bap?

(I'll get me coat).

EarthSight · 26/04/2021 18:39

@Clevererthanyou

Wales is proper lush. Let’s just have a nice cwtch and forget all about it mun issi?

Seriously, Wales is glorious to live in and I’m proud of my Welsh/English/Scottish/Irish heritage Grin

@Clevererthanyou

That's like doing a cockney accent thinking that is represents all of England. The Valleys is just one place in Wales, not all of it!

Piglet89 · 26/04/2021 18:58

I knew a couple of girls at Girton College, Cambridge who did this all the time.

ShagMeRiggins · 26/04/2021 19:06

@Wabe

Well done on shutting up Balliol Boy. Grin

How do you mean an 'Oxbridge location', though? I think if you're living and working somewhere, it would be more natural to use local references? I'm trying to think if I were living in Oxford whether I'd be more likely to refer specifically to my old college, because it might be more relevant, eg 'When I was living in [College] housing on X Street, it was so cold I had to take baths wearing a woolly hat.' Whereas I live in another country these days, and certainly college names would only be recognised by other people who went there. (Apart from Balliol. Grin. No one ever died of the glamour of St Hugh's...)

In fairness to Balliol Boy, he’s really lovely and we’re still friends decades later. I reckon he was just really, really proud of his college.

The ‘Oxbridge location’ was me being a bit of a tot, really, not wanting to say whether I live in Oxford or Cambridge because—as all Mumsnetters know, that would be too...outing. Blush. Sorry about that.

I get the idea that it’s more normal to mention a college if it’s local to Oxford or Cambridge, but I’m in a village outside of the actual city and honestly most people don’t really know the colleges unless they attended (which most didn’t). So it still feels weird to me. (Or maybe I just need to learn more about the colleges. Nah. Wink)

notagainmummy · 26/04/2021 19:14

Think it's universal

EarthSight · 26/04/2021 19:19

@TheRebelle

What’s worse is English people with a “Scottish” surname who get married in Kilts and give their children Scottish names when the closest they are to being Scottish is their 5 x great grandfather once ate some haggis. 🙄
@therebelle Don't. 😂 I watch in a mixture of amusement and cringe when upper class English people on TV talk about The Highlands, Burns Night, shooting, grouse and I just think 'I would love to know how many Scottish people outside of your little bubble you are friends with, other than the groundsman or gardener'. It's so divorced from the lives of most Scots.
NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 26/04/2021 19:32

My favourite is the people who refer to themselves as "Irish" or "Scottish" because they had one granny who was born there and immigrated to England when she was two, and they've literally never set foot there.

TeeniefaeTroon · 26/04/2021 19:32

@HalfCakeHalfBiscuit

How can you tell if you work with someone who is ex-forces?

Because they tell you ALL THE FUCKING TIME

Your experience in a foxhole in Afghanistan bears no relation to your tedious job in accounts. STFU

My husband is ex- forces but many wouldn't know as it's not something he really talks about. He has a friend who also served and he's obsessed by it. Most of his Facebook statuses are about it, he is always away (pre Covid) at reunions, marches etc. Drives me nuts. It was almost 25 years FFS, let it go 😂
BatleyTownswomensGuild · 26/04/2021 19:32

Meh - bigger things to get worked up about tbh....

EarthSight · 26/04/2021 19:39

@Wabe I see we have had the same experiences (I'm Welsh) even down to the IRA comment equivalent. Many English of a certain type still have a grudge after seeing that holiday homes being burnt down in the 80s & 90s in the media. Obviously, not IRA level, but to this day it's clear to me that it seriously rattled many people. Sometimes I've been genuinely shocked as to what I'm supposed to justify or answer for in front if people I hardly know, for things that happened mostly when I was a little girl or before I was even born!!!