Nightmare neighbours

[RainbowBriteUk]

I have been in my current property, a rental, since October last year. It's been a tough year. Redundancy, cancer and a few breakdowns. I thought I was finally settled in life.

NDN's, a man and a woman in their mid-fifties are noisy fuckers. They don't think anything of turning their telly up and every nice day they play music in their back garden so it's been a fair few weeks now. Also lots of shouting, DIY and generally being loud. Difficult when I am WFH and I would love to sit in the garden without their shitty music. However, for the sake of a neighbourly relationship I say nothing. They get pissed in their garden which is fine but become very loud. I've said nothing so far.

Today, I was trying to work. I was irked that they'd had their music on fairly loud since 10am in the garden. They then turned it up. I calmly went out and asked the man to turn it down as I was working and on a work call and the music meant I couldn't hear properly and concentrate and thanked him. It went down for a few seconds and then he turned it mega loud, put the speaker by my back door (fence seperates) and it's still on now.

I have had a few difficult years in rentals so finally hoped I had found somewhere to settle :( I have emailed the agency to let them know what happened but I am scared this is going to be it for ever now. He's going to do stupid things in retaliation. The music has been on very loud for going up to two hours now. Surprised no other neighbours are going off their head.

I have also found out he's been in trouble with the law for carrying an offensive weapon so quite shook up now. What can I do?

@Abracadabra12345 @catfeets @Dashel Thank you all for your replies. It is absolutely heartbreaking.. We moved heaven and earth to renovate our house, we negotiated for years for planning, had to have loads of special permissions to it being grade 11 listed, had to be granted special permissions from Natural England for licences as we had bats. We had been through all of the pain and lived in a caravan in the front garden for 5 mths! We were so happy when it was all finished and we settled down into our home.

Whilst a lot would say it is "normal" family noise it is very loud, louder than I allowed my children to be and certainly it is noticed by friends and family of mine - but that said I do not tolerate noise easily, I will admit that.

I walked round the supermarket in tears last night. I know I have no choice but it is literally like I am having an arm wrenched off, I know that sounds daft but this is not "just" a house. I am dreading this bank holiday weekend. The only hope I have for peace is if it rains all weekend. Can you believe you are praying for rain on a bank holiday weekend so you can enjoy relative peace?

I hate that every time there's a thread like this people just say move/. Moving is a MASSIVE inconvenience and stress and this advice is saying- never stand up for yourself or your rights, never look at other options, just let bullies win, give up and cause huge upheaval to your own life by moving.
If the music happened- I would call the police, every-single-time. The same with the council. I'd record it. I would keep complaining. I'd chat to other neighbours- to all complain as a group. My first thought would not be to just give up, let them win and move on!

@Biancadelrioisback. Not really in all fairness though is it, when in response to the request to turning the music down because of work commitments, he’s actually turned it up and placed the speaker to cause the most noise.

OP, rather than the upheaval of moving in what’s already been a difficult period for you, there are a few things you could try first. Most areas have noise ordinances which mainly cover noise between 11pm and 7am (9am on weekends) but unacceptable noise during the day IS something that can be tackled in various ways. For advice try Royal Greenwich anti social behaviour reporting service on 0208 921 8921 or visit www.royalgreenwhich.gov.uk. I have used them for a family member who had a similar problem and they were very helpful. Your neighbour should be you first port of call - I know you’ve already done this but maybe a longer conversation pointing out that you’re not well and are working from home, and perhaps they could work with you to find a solution acceptable to you both. This does seem unlikely but you need to explore this before your next course of action which is your local council - they can and do tackle unacceptable noise during the day. A council officer will visit and assess things and make a report and if the noise is deemed to be interfering with your enjoyment of your property (and this is pertinent in these pandemic times when people are working from home) they will take action - your neighbour will be served with a nuisance order and if they rent their home, they risk eviction if it carries on.

If you explore as many avenues as you can and nothing works, you can then report it to the police. There is a dedicated noise and nuisance team who will then visit and assess things - but you will need to show you’ve exhausted other options before resorting to this - the number for the team is 020 7525 5777. If your NDN has form for carrying a weapon he probably won’t welcome the police being involved so maybe a visit from a uniformed officer will get it under control. Good luck.

@StarCat2020

Contacting the landlord of the noisy twats usually has no effect either because as long as the landlord is getting their rent money, they don't give a toss. They don't live there.

It's often not that LL don't give a toss, it's that it's very difficult for them to do anything about it.

It's been made incredibly difficult for LLs to evict aresholes from their properties.

Organisations like Shelter, etc, put huge effort into preventing evictions. The result of which is that peaceful, law abiding people get shit on in favour of scum like some of the people described by OP and others in this thread.

Does the neighbour own or rent? I had a nightmare tenant but didnt know it until after they moved out and I asked the neighbour if I could borrow something and then all kind of stories came out like having to ring the police because he was chasing his GF with a knife. I had no idea. I would have ended the tenancy earlier if I had known..

Get headphones for your conference calls so that you can hear better to block out the idiot neighbours...

I thought this was about me at first!

However although we listen to music outside and do DIY and gardening with power tools, we try to be considerate of our neighbors.

We also WFH due to COVID, so are v quiet during the day and noisy neighbors can be a pita. We used to have neighbors opposite who would have frequent loud parties (even during the week) which was a nightmare with young children and having to work the next day.

Some people are just entitled arseholes. I’d move if I were you and had the option.

Otherwise noise cancelling headphone may work.

My goodness, I've been horrified by the number of threads on here since I've been coming on to this site, with such heart breaking stories about horrible, vile neighbours.

I feel so sorry for all of you that are living such unhappy lives in your own homes, I wish these dregs nothing but the worst for causing so much stress to the lovely, decent people who are unfortunate enough to live next to them.

I wish you all the very best in either moving (although why the hell should you) or being able to get something done to get rid of the problem and hope you finally get the peaceful lives you are entitled to.

@Notsoaccidentproneanymore
However although we listen to music outside and do DIY and gardening with power tools, we try to be considerate of our neighbors

If you regularly listen to music in the garden, you are NOT being considerate of your neighbours. Get your headphones on and enjoy the music without potentially disturbing the people around.

What @SofiaMichelle said. In normal times it takes six months to evict a tenant whatever they are up to. Currently it will be at least two years even when evictions restart. If you have nightmare tenants next door, nothing will happen. And yes it is a lot to do with shelter and their malicious agenda.

[quote pam290358]@Biancadelrioisback. Not really in all fairness though is it, when in response to the request to turning the music down because of work commitments, he’s actually turned it up and placed the speaker to cause the most noise.

OP, rather than the upheaval of moving in what’s already been a difficult period for you, there are a few things you could try first. Most areas have noise ordinances which mainly cover noise between 11pm and 7am (9am on weekends) but unacceptable noise during the day IS something that can be tackled in various ways. For advice try Royal Greenwich anti social behaviour reporting service on 0208 921 8921 or visit www.royalgreenwhich.gov.uk. I have used them for a family member who had a similar problem and they were very helpful. Your neighbour should be you first port of call - I know you’ve already done this but maybe a longer conversation pointing out that you’re not well and are working from home, and perhaps they could work with you to find a solution acceptable to you both. This does seem unlikely but you need to explore this before your next course of action which is your local council - they can and do tackle unacceptable noise during the day. A council officer will visit and assess things and make a report and if the noise is deemed to be interfering with your enjoyment of your property (and this is pertinent in these pandemic times when people are working from home) they will take action - your neighbour will be served with a nuisance order and if they rent their home, they risk eviction if it carries on.

If you explore as many avenues as you can and nothing works, you can then report it to the police. There is a dedicated noise and nuisance team who will then visit and assess things - but you will need to show you’ve exhausted other options before resorting to this - the number for the team is 020 7525 5777. If your NDN has form for carrying a weapon he probably won’t welcome the police being involved so maybe a visit from a uniformed officer will get it under control. Good luck.[/quote]
This is great advice which I will note. In the OP’s case, she’s a single person with an aggressive NDN so the but she has to do first is scary and she may feel vulnerable during that time. I’d fear an escalation, personally

These threads make me so sad. I’ve been there and it really does destroy your mental health. Currently we have neighbours backing onto us, an HMO, and they have loud parties every night, and weekend days, in nice weather. I was lucky in that I was able to move into the front bedroom (from the back) so it no longer disturbs my sleep. I also wfh so I have my garden time during the week days and stay away at the weekends. It shouldn’t be like that but there’s nothing else I can do. Tried talking to them numerous times, got nowhere. No other neighbours seem to complain (god knows why as all other neighbours are quiet like me) so I had to adapt. It’s just so bloody selfish. It really should be illegal because people have proper breakdowns and all sorts over it.

OP you’re doing the best thing by moving. It’s a shame you have to but neighbour noise isn’t dealt with properly. I’d like to see people fined, with the fines escalating for further offences. Hit people in the pocket and it would soon stop.

This is exactly what I did @Meruem. It is shocking though that quiet, decent people have to adjust their lives to make them bearable. Our quiet does not disturb them and yet we are disturbed by then.

Few people will tackle it though. And often even when you do tackle it the noisy neighbors don't care. They know they are noisy. They often hate noisy made by others!

It never used to be like this. Even as students we were considerate because other people have different lifestyles!

@Cosmos45 I really do feel for you. I also used to pray for rain just so I wouldn't have to hear the screaming kids outside and music playing in the garden. We used to go and walk around the supermarket or shops for hours just so we weren't at home having to listen to it. It affected our mental health badly and I was so glad to get away.
Now it seems the new neighbours are just as bad, I'm already dreading the bank holiday (my DPs birthday will likely be ruined), spring bank (my birthday will be spent listening to them being noisy) and worst of all, the 6wk holidays.

We can't afford to move from this new house for a very long time but I just can't see us being happy here when we're already avoiding being at home.

Noisy neighbours are awful.
If you can, move.
I too dread the summer as alcohol ramps up the volume of noise dramatically.

Noise causes untold misery.
It would be bliss to live in a datachecplace far from any neighbours- that would be bliss!

I hate reading these threads and being reminded just how many inconsiderate tossers there are out there. Awful.

Been there and it's a living nightmare.

OP, this is where being a renter is a huge advantage. Yes, you are contracted, but you know it will end and that you can get out. Also, you can call the police and/or their landlord if they also rent, to complain, without worrying about needing to declare anything on home buyers pack.

However although we listen to music outside and do DIY and gardening with power tools, we try to be considerate of our neighbors.

Inflicting your music on other people is NEVER considerate.

@sundowners
I get what you’re saying about standing up for yourself and that moving isn’t straight forward.
But in this case the neighbour has form for aggressive behaviour so OP could be putting herself at risk by aggravating him or even having any interaction with him.

Also, moving house can be more straightforward from a rented property, but there is the chance of losing money on the deposit and also that some areas don’t have many rentals anyway. Also if she had school going children that would be another consideration as you don’t want to move too far from school or have to change school. I think that’s not the case with OP here though.

I should correct that the neighbour has been in trouble for carrying an offensive weapon.

@catfeets I am so sorry moving did not resolve it for you. I think we are going to put house on the market and see how we get on with it and then rent for a year or so. I am looking on rightmove at the moment and I satellite everything, if there is a whiff of another house near me it's enough for me to discount it. As mentioned before, we moved here because it was "rural" - dead quiet during the night (apart from the lambs in the field behind), no street lights, no pavements on the roads, birds twittering.. Then the weekend arrives (or after school) and the full size bouncy castle goes up, the bbq goes on, multiple families arrive with their little angels in tow and we are set for a weekend long screaming/shrieking/music playing onslaught. I can sit indoors with noise cancelling headphones and a white noise machine and still hear the kids shrieking.. It's no way to live your life but I am absolutely devastated and can't stop crying about having to leave my beautiful home.

[quote NotQuiteHere]@Notsoaccidentproneanymore
However although we listen to music outside and do DIY and gardening with power tools, we try to be considerate of our neighbors

If you regularly listen to music in the garden, you are NOT being considerate of your neighbours. Get your headphones on and enjoy the music without potentially disturbing the people around.[/quote]
I have to agree. Sound travels and does funny things, as poor Cosmos has discovered with their NDN’s brick wall which acts as a sort of amphitheatre, amplifying sound. Even with just fences, there’s no soundproofing in a garden. It’s outside and neighbours are forced to listen to and try to block out your choice of music, and that’s not fair.

It doesn’t have to be loud to be irritating and to destroy any sense of peace.

Cosmos I am so very sorry, you’d think with somewhere so rural, others would want that peace for themselves. The saddest thing is that the next buyer will have the same problems because of the way laws work in the UK, weighted towards the antisocial NDNs

No other neighbours seem to complain (god knows why as all other neighbours are quiet like me) so I had to adapt.

@Meruem that's what I thought too. My other neighbours can't work from home and I don't know how they don't complain either. Unless they do and we're just led to assume they don't. Who knows?

@Cosmos45 that sounds much louder than we're dealing with. Like you, I don't deal well with noise at all but you shouldn't have to put up with excessive noise on such a regular basis.
We too have a field of sheep behind, but certainly weren't expecting it to be used every weekend for the neighbour's dreadful kids to whizz around on quad bikes.
We were assured before we moved in by the one decent neighbour that all you can hear here is the birds - they're not as close to the screaming and music as we are though and can escape to their multiple holiday homes whenever it gets too much for them.

It must be absolutely gutting for you to have to move away from such a beautiful home. I don't know when it became acceptable to not give a crap about your neighbours. People are so selfish and it's about time something was done about it.

What's made it even worse for me is that a much more suitable property just came on the market in a much better location, only a local farm as a neighbour and 1.5 acres of garden with countryside views. We gave up waiting for a property like that and settled for the one we're in now - that we can't afford to move on from.

I hope you have luck selling your property if you sadly have to go down that road. We were so worried about the noise while selling the last house and prayed they wouldn't start pumping out dance music. I suppose though that if your neighbours are pretty constant with the noise, it would be present at viewings so the buyer wouldn't really have any comeback after purchasing.

I honestly don’t see that listening to music a couple of hours a week in the garden over the summer is any worse than spending 4 hours cutting a hedge with an electric hedge trimmer. Or having your garden re paved and having to listen to bricks and paving slabs being cut with an angle grinder for hours and days on end.

We live in a house with a huge garden on a corner plot, with loads of trees and have few immediate neighbors (who also have large gardens). I don’t have the music loud or play it late, we don’t have parties or friends/family round.

I don’t think you should assume everyone’s circumstances are the same.

Is it really a couple of hours though? My neighbours can have theirs on in the garden for up to ten hours. It's a living nightmare. He also has it on whilst using his power tools so can't even hear it and also when they go out. I don't use the word often but cunts is the only woRd to describe them.