To feel embarrassed by birthday gift?

[DeerestMartha]

I feel so embarrassed ...

It was DDs 8th birthday on Friday and two of her friends have birthdays the same week so yesterday we arranged to meet a couple of her friends and their parents at a local attraction (within the rule of 6).

The girls exchanged cards and each of them had money inside. I had given both other girls £5 each along with some sweeties.

My DD received £10 from both of her friends 😳 .

My DD thanked them and nothing was said by either children or parents but I feel very guilty.

For context , one child’s parents are in high flying jobs, the other is mid income and I am very low income.

Would you be bothered if this was your child? I can’t shake the shame !

I think £10-£15 is a fairly standard amount that is spent by parents for a gift on a school friend for their child so it’s also what I budget to fall in line with others. However, I also wouldn’t think anything if my child was given less whereas I would feel embarrassed if it was more. So I can understand why you feel the way you do.

My dd's are 14 +15. Limit is £3 for general friends and a special gift for a special friend... 3quid gets a bath bomb /bar of chocolate and a face pack /other toiletries
Dd's are happy and had no complaints from their mates!
I put my foot down a few years ago when ds was demanding I buy Pandora charms for his friend's 16th!! Sod that!! Multiple friends not just 1!!

@ElderMillennial

FGS 🙄 No the rule is up to 6 people or only two households if there are more than 6.

I only asked and only because OP mentioned it. Why are people so hostile about covid rules??

Don’t you think you’ve been quite rude not bothering to answer the OPs actual question, derailing the thread and bring up Covid rules pointlessly as the OP is in the right anyway? Why did you feel the need to do that?

OP, you gave what you could afford. Don’t feel embarrassed. £20 when on a low income is a lot of money to lose in one go. You got a gift for the girls and they will still be able to afford something off £5. Please don’t feel remotely bad.

@ElderMillennial

Isn't the rule of 6 also that you are to be from no more than two households?

I wouldn't worry about the gift. You gave what you thought was a reasonable amount and so did they. It could have gone the other way and you gave sweets as well...

If you're going to act like the covid police at least know the guidance!

@DeerestMartha dont worry at all. Myself and my dd are always grateful to receive any gift and if you are all friends there should be no comparison. I hope you all had a lovely time.

Wouldn’t bother me in the slightest.

Isn't the rule of 6 also that you are to be from no more than two households?

No

Really don't worry about it. It happens 🤷🏼‍♀️

I think those of you who are offended by that need to ask yourselves why.

Because the thread isn’t about Covid. It’s about a child’s birthday gift and a mother who is worried.

Because we are sick of hearing about Covid.

Because you could have just googled it instead of derailing a thread.

Because it’s boring. It’s tedious. Volunteer as a Marshall of you are so passionate about it.

"I don't know the rules because I am shielding and haven't been out in any social get togethers"

Oh dear, shielding has ended and you can still familiarise yourself with basic rules with a simple gov website search.

The good news is you can go out now! No need to shield anymore

Get yourself outside! Shielding is a thing of the past.

I'm not being nasty. You really don't need to shield anymore

OP, don’t feel bad! Your present probably went down even better as there were sweets involved. Sounds like the perfect combination of gifts.

@ElderMillennial

Isn't the rule of 6 also that you are to be from no more than two households?

I wouldn't worry about the gift. You gave what you thought was a reasonable amount and so did they. It could have gone the other way and you gave sweets as well...

Wrong it's 2 households or 6 from different households!!

No matter the circumstances, shielding is very harsh and isn't intended to be a long term thing.

You should've had both vaccines by now and can be careful but still get outside!

You have nothing to feel embarrassed about IMO.

@Lknocsqq11

STOP COVID POLICING EVERY THREAD.

YES!

dont be embarrased,
dd has bought home party bags more valuable than the present she gave!
that is life

@ElderMillennial good luck with your pregnancy. It still isn't healthy to shield long term and won't help your anxiety whatsoever! There's a lot to be said for fresh air.

Everyone should know the guidance by now so that they can make appropriate decisions.

What a spectacular merail this thread is.