Would you lie about your age if asked at interview?

[LipstickLou]

Having feared there was nothing out there for me at 55 I have a job interview next week. I have posted before about feeling on the scrap heap as I have been passed over for the last 16 months (all interviews came to nothing with the successful candidates being at least 15 years younger than me). I have given them an abridged CV as advised and no dates re my first job and degrees. They have asked for 20 years experience but the job ad had lots of references to a 'young' company. If I get asked my age I would like to say over 21, what do others think?- I know they legally shouldn't ask but they tend to say 'you have fabulous skin, do you mind if I ask how old you are?' sneaky but I have no poker face.

Don't lie but don't tell them either. You'll have to provide ID with your DOB on if you get the job and lying is likely to get you fired. If they ask outright, which seems highly unlikely, just say 'old enough' and smile.

I don’t think they’ll ask you but if they do you just deflect it gently - ‘ oh we don’t talk about ages, do we?’ or ‘well, I have the 20yrs of experience you specified in you ad, let’s leave it at that (tinkly laugh)’

No, I look my age so there would be absolutely no point in knocking off enough years to make me look more employable. They won't ask your age anyway, but they'll already have worked it out from your education and employment history so they're expecting you to be roughly 55.

No, I’d say ‘My age has nothing to do with my ability to do the job’ and then go on to talk about the job.

If you don’t get it, you can complain under the equality act 2010 as age is a protected characteristic and you could have them for direct discrimination.

They won't ask. If they have asked for 20 years experience (which seems very excessive anyway) they won't be expecting to employ anyone under 40 anyway surely.

Don't lie. You will be asked to provide ID to prove your right to work in the UK.
What's the feedback been from your previous interviews? Are you sure it's just your age that's the issue? Be brutally honest with yourself.

I wouldn't let someone's age stop me from hiring the best person for the job. At 55, you have many years of useful work ahead of you.

Good luck with the interview

@Hellocatshome

They won't ask. If they have asked for 20 years experience (which seems very excessive anyway) they won't be expecting to employ anyone under 40 anyway surely.

I would think that person would need to be at least 45 as you don't really get line management in my field until mid 20s.

@HeyJackKerouac

Don't lie. You will be asked to provide ID to prove your right to work in the UK. What's the feedback been from your previous interviews? Are you sure it's just your age that's the issue? Be brutally honest with yourself.

I wouldn't let someone's age stop me from hiring the best person for the job. At 55, you have many years of useful work ahead of you.

Good luck with the interview

I have been brutally honest with myself. I have been dieting to look better (one company owner told me I looked younger as I was a big girl!). My industry is looks orientated. You have to be young and fashionable. I can also appear frightening (6ft) and I have a firm manner. Never worried people in my 30 year career. Worries them now.

If you look your age there is no point in lying about it - they'll know the truth soon anyway. Good luck !

I am 56, it has taken every one of those years for me to gain the experience I have. If they want to look for someone younger with less experience then they can.
However I am in a very obscure technical field and I do look about 10 years younger than I actually am!

If they're asking, you're probably off the shortlist.

As they're asking their recruitment procedures need improvement (either in policy or in execution)

So it's a case of whether you want to stay polite and just answer (gritting teeth is often good if it's a small,sector and people know each other)

Or if you want to give a more authentic answer, because you feel you have nothing to lose at this point.

I know I'd grit my teeth. But I'd be wishing I had the attitude to say 'thank you. Interview over, that sort of question is banned and would not be asked by a prospective employer who gave more than lip,service tomequality issues, and I do not want to work for anyone substandard in such an important area. Now, have you got that word-for-word for your interview notes. Good, because I'll be sending feedback too'

@starrynight21

If you look your age there is no point in lying about it - they'll know the truth soon anyway. Good luck !

Thank you. i do look 10 years younger- beauty industry employee but no fillers or surgery. I did have a client who put it in my consultancy contract that I couldn't have tweaks so she could say my skin was down to her products! As we all have to show our passport they will get the info eventually I just don't want to come across as aggressive if they ask me.

Perhaps you could do something to soften your appearance for interview if you are worried about it? Not suggesting at all that you should or need to but it seems you are looking for ideas and lying isn’t a good way to start a relationship with your future employer.

In your shoes after 16 months I’d be trying something different. I’ve no idea on your usual style so these are just generalisations... Perhaps try flat shoes, a dress suit instead of a trouser suit, a pale pink or yellow shirt instead of white, minimal matching and small jewellery, and add some volume to your hair and light makeup?

I’m an experienced recruiting manager and first impressions count. If you feel you are coming off “firm and frightening” I’d be way more concerned about that than your age.

Then during the interview, what is your technique like? Do you answer the question and wait for the next? The most memorable and hireable candidates build a rapport, make a small (appropriate) joke to lighten the mood. By the end it often becomes a conversation - it’s a real skill. There are some excellent resources available online which could help you too.

EdithWeston I love you! My late mother would have got up and walked out.

It's been a little while since I had a job interview but have never been asked my age and can't imagine I ever would be.

Is it something that's the norm in your sector? I understand that it's not allowed but I'm not naive enough to think that all interviewers stick to the rules.

@Ohdeariedear

I don’t think they’ll ask you but if they do you just deflect it gently - ‘ oh we don’t talk about ages, do we?’ or ‘well, I have the 20yrs of experience you specified in you ad, let’s leave it at that (tinkly laugh)’

Big red line through name on interview list for the patronising attitude and "tinkly laugh".

@Randomness12

Perhaps you could do something to soften your appearance for interview if you are worried about it? Not suggesting at all that you should or need to but it seems you are looking for ideas and lying isn’t a good way to start a relationship with your future employer.

In your shoes after 16 months I’d be trying something different. I’ve no idea on your usual style so these are just generalisations... Perhaps try flat shoes, a dress suit instead of a trouser suit, a pale pink or yellow shirt instead of white, minimal matching and small jewellery, and add some volume to your hair and light makeup?

I’m an experienced recruiting manager and first impressions count. If you feel you are coming off “firm and frightening” I’d be way more concerned about that than your age.

Then during the interview, what is your technique like? Do you answer the question and wait for the next? The most memorable and hireable candidates build a rapport, make a small (appropriate) joke to lighten the mood. By the end it often becomes a conversation - it’s a real skill. There are some excellent resources available online which could help you too.

Thank you for this. I know I scare the be Jesus out of people. It is fine when I am doing my job (huge M & A contracts worth £ms) I usually deal with men but at first stage it will be a female recruiter. I am a huge supporter of women but I come across as a bit of a ball breaker I think. I am a softy really but my skill is complex commercial negotiations. I have toned down my clothes as I always wore red. I might try a blouse which I usually avoid as I look like Margaret Thatcher!

@FlyingBurrito

It's been a little while since I had a job interview but have never been asked my age and can't imagine I ever would be.

Is it something that's the norm in your sector? I understand that it's not allowed but I'm not naive enough to think that all interviewers stick to the rules.

Yep. Always asked as I have very good skin (I will allow that one ). I get stopped on buses etc. Then they say ''go on. how old are you!'' If I was thin enough I think I would try mature modelling- a new career! Result of 40 years of face cream and plenty of make up to keep the sun off, plus I have never smoked.

If they ask about age then you need to ask yourself if you want to work for a company that practices discrimination.

I'd run a mile.

I also work for an investment bank, and one of their company culture slogans is speaking up and being assertive. I had a mildly provocative question in my interview and it turned out it was to test how I would respond!
I also struggle with how I present myself. For years, I'd try and look older so I would get taken seriously. Or join in with older cultural references to cement that impression.
Now I don't try and look younger, but mould my look in a different way. I look to Christine lagarde or the devil wears Prada (cheesy but yes really 😅) for scary meetings - I've watched interviews with Meryl streep and she actually talks about the presence that she was trying to achieve.
I'll channel Arden, Leslie knope from parks and recreation (much toned down obviously!) For a softer approach.
I don't know much media, if you have watched more movies you might be able to think of more examples - no shame in copying!

How odd

Who are these strange people who see someone with good skin and ask how old they are? That doesn't make any sense unless the rest of you looks like a geriatric.

Obviously I don't know your history but your posts are very negative about yourself. Why are people you are coming across treating you in this strange manner?

How are you behaving in interviews that strangers think you're a ball breaker after meeting you for a few minutes?

I agree that dressing in red can come off as a bit much but it's not that or pussy bow blouses. There's a whole world of clothes inbetween. Now the shops are open have you been and had a look?

*How odd

Who are these strange people who see someone with good skin and ask how old they are? That doesn't make any sense unless the rest of you looks like a geriatric.*

That's exactly what I was going to say. Really weird, surely they'd just think you were whatever age you looked. Why would they assume you were older with good skin.

I am not very confident anymore. Feedback has been given that I frighten people and they worry how I will fit in to a company.
The comments around my skin are not odd. I take buses and people often ask what perfume I am wearing, then do I work in cosmetics etc. Then they say what skin cream do you use. This conversation I am good at.