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AIBU?

What time do your kids go to bed

35 replies

ivegotthisyeah · 20/04/2021 20:48

On a school night?
I have a 10 yr old ( bed 830)
8 year old ( bed 8)
Both can read in bed - I am the big bad mum as all their friends go to bed at 930/10 but I'm in bed at that time as I'm exhausted I have a little one too be he's a dream at bed time.
Interested to know if I am mean out of sync or are these times ok? I will add mine turn into zombies on lock of sleep like their mum 🤣

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noworklifebalance · 20/04/2021 21:12

10 year old is still up - ideally they would be in bed by 8pm reading so I can a bit of time to myself but loves chatting to us and having some time alone with us, so I feel bad. Often still awake at 9.30/10pm.

8 year old - ideally lights out at 8pm but often caught reading later than that!

idontlikealdi · 20/04/2021 21:14

My nearly ten year olds have just gone to sleep. In bed at 830 on a school night and lights out at 9pm.

Nodancingshoes · 20/04/2021 21:15

My 10yr old goes at 930 - usually asleep by 10. I wish it were earlier but we have tried and failed...

NormaSnickers · 20/04/2021 21:15

Just turned 9yr old DS is in bed by 8.30 but will then read for a while, he’s usually awake till at least 10ish.

Dollywilde · 20/04/2021 21:19

I only have a 8mo so no personal experience but I remember our rule was an extra 15 mins from 7.30 with every year from school age, so

5yo - 7.30
6yo - 7.45
7yo - 8.00
8yo - 8.15
9yo - 8.30
10yo - 8.45
11yo - 9.00
12yo - 9.15
13yo - 9.30

Around 14 it went to shit 😂 but I always looked forward to my next birthday for that extra 15 mins!

Amammai · 20/04/2021 21:21

The sleep council website recommends 10-12 hours sleeps for 7-12year olds so depending on what time they need to be up, it sounds like their bedtimes pretty sensible.

Camomila · 20/04/2021 21:22

1 year old at 8
5 year old at 9

DS2 wakes up early, DS1 likes a lie-in.

nailslikeknives · 20/04/2021 21:23

I've a 10 & an 8 yr old. They share a room out of necessity. Into bed at 7.30pm, heads down and asleep by 8pm.
It's for my sanity and they're v active so need the rest!

WalkingMeAway · 20/04/2021 21:25

My 4 year old goes to bed between 7.30pm - 8.30pm depending on what sort of day we've had. He normally sleeps 11-12 hours.

My 12 year old goes to bed between 9.30pm - 10pm. She sleeps 9 hours.

Hellocatshome · 20/04/2021 21:25

10 year old, actually turning 11 tomorrow, goes to bed at 9:30 but he swims straight from school until 6 every day so needs a few hours to eat tea and chill out.
14 year old goes to bed at 11.

FontyMcFontface · 20/04/2021 21:26

6yo - 7.30 read til 8
9yo - 8 to 8.30 read til 9
11yo 9.30 read as long as she wants, she’s reliable at knowing when she’s tired.
13yo 10pm read til 10.30

GintyMcGinty · 20/04/2021 21:26

8 year old goes at 9pm

12 year old goes at 10pm and he will usually read for a while.

beginningoftheend · 20/04/2021 21:29

@ivegotthisyeah

On a school night?
I have a 10 yr old ( bed 830)
8 year old ( bed 8)
Both can read in bed - I am the big bad mum as all their friends go to bed at 930/10 but I'm in bed at that time as I'm exhausted I have a little one too be he's a dream at bed time.
Interested to know if I am mean out of sync or are these times ok? I will add mine turn into zombies on lock of sleep like their mum 🤣

This sounds fine, it is a little later than mine were at same age.

I trained mine to tell their friends they went to bed 'when I want' rather than ever answer with a time as they seemed to go earlier than lots of others. This helped a lot.

Maybe my kids find me boring but never seemed to mind going to bed

.

DeathMetalMum · 20/04/2021 21:30

8&10 share a room currently going upstairs 7.30, lights out and books away at 8.30. Have to wake them up in the morning for school most days so it's about right.

ivegotthisyeah · 20/04/2021 21:30

Thanks for all your replies I'm happy for them to be in bed for that time and read etc I just feel like I need a break so in your rooms!
Single mum too so probably feeling a bit exhausted.
They would go to bed later than me if I let them! 10 yr old will get up fine the next day but the 8 yr old is a bloody nightmare to get up for school which just stresses everyone out for school!
I need a nanny when I win the lottery 🤣🙏🏻

OP posts:

ASatisfyingThump · 20/04/2021 21:32

In theory, 4yo goes to bed at 7, 11yo at 9. In reality, I'm still sitting on DS2s bedroom floor because he "can't sleep" and DS1 is still farting around getting ready for bed. I fucking hate bedtime

rainbowandglitter · 20/04/2021 21:39

My 11 yo goes to be at 9.30.

8pm sounds early for a 10 yo but I guess if he's falling asleep at that time he must be tired then.

rainbowandglitter · 20/04/2021 21:39

Oops I meant 8.30pm

SimonJT · 20/04/2021 21:39

Almost six year old 7:15.

rainbowandglitter · 20/04/2021 21:40

Arghhh I meant 8.30pm sounds early for a 10 yo

Ess1981 · 20/04/2021 21:41

I don't think you're being unreasonable. Those times seem early to me but we're all different when it comes to sleep. I am the person who can eat and drink what I like right before bed, stare at my phone for hours, and still have a good sleep. My DH thinks he can't survive without 10 hours of sleep on a weekend....blahblahblah. My DC are 7 and 5 - they are both ready for bed at 730 but are allowed to play in their bedrooms until they're tired (although we try and cap 7yo at 10pm). They will come in and out to us but we have boundaries that they are expected to stick to (e.g. 7yo can come into the lounge after 5yo is asleep but has to be relatively quiet as we're tired and trying to relax!) Don't feel mean about what you are doing - you need time to relax too! xx

MiaowMiaow99 · 20/04/2021 21:45

Nothing wrong with them being in their rooms to chill, but my 10 year old wouldnt be tired enough at 8.30 or 9pm if had reading time.
We're at 10.00pm and he goes out after reading.

underneaththeash · 20/04/2021 21:46

DD (9) goes up at 8.40, I turn her light out at 9.15, but she needs to be up by 6.45am.
DS2(12) goes up at 9.30 and switches pen light off
DS(1) about 10.15/10.30.

Waiting423 · 20/04/2021 22:02

11(just) and 12 go at 9 - normally both asleep within 15/20 mins . They both wake about 6.30 . Historically I’ve kept bedtimes the same for them both though realistically sometimes the younger one could go a little earlier . If he’s really tired though he will ask to go up earlier.

DrCoconut · 20/04/2021 22:04

Mine are real night owls. If DS3 (age 5) goes to bed before 9 he wakes up again after a a couple of hours nap and then he's refreshed and ready to party like it's 1999. I don't know why but he's been like it for ages. I just daren't let him sleep early even if he wants to, which isn't often. DS2 is 10 and I now try to have him asleep by 11 for his own good as he'd stay up until the small hours if allowed. People look at me funny when they find out that my kids don't go to bed early but I'd find being up at 5 or 6am every day far worse and that's considered normal. It comes down to what works for the child and the family.

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