AIBU to think this music teacher sounds like too much hard work?

[musicalquiz]

I need a music teacher for my DD. I've found one online (via Facebook) who is apparently going to be joining DD's school in September. This is a very specific instrument and teachers aren't too easy to find.

I've asked teacher to email me his DBS. He has said no, he won't email it to me but he will bring it to my house when he takes DD for her first lesson. I'd rather see it ahead of time as his Facebook is very closed down and I can't see any of his details via the account - fake name etc.

He also wants paying in cash. No bank transfer. Cash only. This is 1) a PITA for me to make sure I have the right amount each week and 2) makes me wonder about tax evasion.

Finally, teacher can't do the days I want. We can do the other days but means rearranging one of my own weekly engagements.

AIBU to sack it off and keep looking for another teacher or am I just being grumpy and unreasonable?

“ This is a very specific instrument and teachers aren't too easy to find.”

I guess you’d better find a different fit who works around your schedule then.

Another person here who wouldn't provide DBS in advance, but happy to show it in person. The days you want not being days they are available- again, no issue. He is entitled to have days he's free and days that are inconvenient with his life- he doesn't have to adjust his life for teaching after hours. A closed down FB- he's a teacher- they are expected to have a low online presence as per usually terms of social media policy in schools so pupils don't stalk them- again, no issue. Only want to cash payments- probably is a tax dodge, so that's the only one I'd be basing my choice on as to whether to go ahead.

When I was a Guide leader, I would sometimes spend a whole half term chasing up parents who kept saying they would do the bank transfer as soon as they got in. I don't blame him for not accepting them.

I don't think anything he's done is unreasonable.

But if swapping days and getting out cash is too much of a hassle for you, YWNBU to keep looking until you find someone who fits your schedule.

When I was a Guide leader, I would sometimes spend a whole half term chasing up parents who kept saying they would do the bank transfer as soon as they got in. I don't blame him for not accepting them.

Yup, I used to tutor students and I either accepted cash on a weekly basis or monthly bank transfer in advance (I had a very clear absence/refund policy to cover if any classes weren't raken) because I got sick of having to chase up people who would "transfer the money asap" and still not have done it by the time the next class rolled around.

If they paid cash on a weekly basis I would give them one weeks grace of "forgetting" (everyone forgets occasionally) but if they didn't transfer the money during the week or have both weeks payment at the next class then I would give notice as I was not about to start being messed about and not paid for my time. If it was monthly bank transfer up front then it was much harder to "forget" or be messed around and made it so much easier when doing my tax return to be able to match everything up easily.

You can't ask him to email you a copy of his DBS, he just needs to show it to you at the start of the first lesson. As people have said it contains lots of his personal information. Of course his FB page is closed down- this is the most professional thing for a teacher to ensure with their social media. You will be able to see his full name on his DBS, seems like he has given you his real name but on his FB page he doesn't use his real name? Again, this is often done by teachers to protect themselves from being found online by students. I'm sure you can organise to have cash in the house once a week, if he's a good teacher and it is hard to find this type of music teacher, maybe it would be worth it for your daughter. He hasn't even had a chance to actually teach her a lesson yet!

If you are paying for a service with your hard earned money then it needs to work for you. Otherwise you’re forking out for something that doesn’t fit in with your week and from what you have said you’re not to sure about the person itself. Keep looking!

Not sure you should send your dbs off via email , you then have a copy and he is willing to bring original
Cash prob yes using as extra not declaring possibly but wouldn't bother me overly.
Times - well he can do times that suits him , he may have other lessons and commitments prior fo you
Facebook shutdown as he is a teacher maybe ?
Can you ask school about him ? Or anyone else who has used him?
Pop round to see dbs before he comes to you ?

When you say you found him on fb, was he advertising his services or did you post on there advertising that you needed one? If it's the latter I'd be a bit suspicious of some random bloke answering the ad using a false name, he could be anyone. Could you check with the school if they have someone new starting?

Not providing full copy of DBS - fine
Not being available when you want - also fine
Wanting to be paid in cash - mildly inconvenient

If he's a good teacher, it's likely he'll be in demand and therefore you will need to take the slots he has available. YABU to think his existing pupils should have their lessons rescheduled to make things more convenient for you. I've never asked to see a music teacher's DBS nor have I looked for them on Facebook. I have searched online for their professional website, profile on a 'find a music teacher' website and in some cases, to find recordings they've made/performances. Was your DD's current teacher not able to recommend a new teacher? Freelance music teachers are able to pick and choose who to take on so you may find he is having reservations about taking on your DD if you aren't happy with his terms.

Timetabling pupils is tricky. If a teacher's time is fully used and one or two pupils leave (at the end of term or whatever) then the teacher will respond to a query by saying that they do have limited spaces. But these might be limited to one or two specific time slots. I find that new pupils tend to be stuck with Fridays and as older ones move on they can have more choice of time.

the teacher will respond to a query by saying that they do have limited spaces. But these might be limited to one or two specific time slots.

Also, having been a tutor it is very unlikely that a private teacher is going to start moving their existing students' schedules to accommodate a new student when they don't know how reliable they will be.

I have had students that I rearranged schedules for only to have them mess me around, cancel classes, be late paying and generally been more hassle than they were worth. So new students got offered the slots I had available after I'd offered them to existing students in case they wanted to switch time/day.

Not providing full copy of DBS - fine
Not being available when you want - also fine
Wanting to be paid in cash - mildly inconvenient

Agree with all of this!

You said yourself it wasn't a common instrument and teachers are hard to come by. Could you pay cash in blocks of lessons instead of having the exact change each week?