To despair of new neighbours' shrieking children?

[saraclara]

It's been a glorious afternoon, but I've had to spend it indoors, and even with my doors closed I can hear them. I don't know how they can shriek for this long without having really sore throats. It's not ordinary play shouting, it's just pointless daft shrieking as far as I can tell. They've been out there for at least four hours. There was a break for about 20 minutes, then it started up again. I'm guessing from the tone of the shrieks that they're about 7-9 years old?

There's nothing I can do about it, is there? This is it for the spring and summer.

I could weep.

This is the first time in my life that I've had shrieking child neighbours. Until now I've just had normal playing sounds and laughter
Okay I get you, it's severe I'd speak to the parents then.
If unlucky if they're not willing too change noise cancelling headphones are brilliant for keeping out sounds.
I can link a cheap pair and useful set I bought for DS they are adult he has a very large head.

@ZeroFuchsGiven
I have two children and there is a massive difference between kids playing and kids screaming and screeching from 5am until 7 at night.surely it’s normal for parents to check on the kids and tell them to calm down ? Sorry but I would rather listen to my other neighbours four chihuahua dogs bark at least they are not thrown out from am to pm to torment the life out of other neighbours.

I have two children and there is a massive difference between kids playing and kids screaming and screeching from 5am until 7 at night.surely it’s normal for parents to check on the kids and tell them to calm down ?

The kids in my street (actually it’s just the girls) scream all the time when they’re outside. First time I moved to this street me and DP thought someone was being attacked/kidnapped!! Now we just ignore it and assume they’re just ‘playing’

It’s not normal sounds of children playing or even loud shrieking and laughing it’s like they’re taking a deep breath and just going Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! As loud as they can, but high pitched!

@Thatisnotwhatisaid

You could always sit in the garden with some earphones in. I have young children so I think the sound of children is just totally natural and normal to me, I barely even notice it.

If you read the thread properly you will see it is about children shrieking not just playing.

Why do so many children today shriek and screech? Me and my siblings didn't because we would have got a telling off. None of my nieces or nephews did either. The odd shriek maybe but not continual screeching for hours day after day.

I think mumsnet has become less tolerant than it should be. This is really sad.
Yes, I am wholeheartedly in the belief that parents should teach their children to have respect for their neighbours and that means playing respectfully.
My issue is that the OP doesn't know these people and therefore has no idea whether the children have SN or not. She says it is not typical playing, therefore, why not? As a parent of children with SN I would rather the offended neighbour came to talk to me about it than complain to all and sundry about my unruly kids and bad parenting.
I have to parent over and above those with neurotypical children as my children do not understand verbal instructions and can be overwhelmed and react noisily to their own discomfort.
If they are being too loud I take them in. I have explained to my closest neighbours. I spend hours calming my youngest, and trying to explain what I need her to do.
I wish I could be a lazy parent, I can't.
Without knowing any situation it is not right to sit in judgement.

Kids who scream full stop. No need for screaming. Yes I’ve had kids

@DaphneHastings

I’d poke my head over the fence and say very loudly but pleasantly, ‘hi what are you doing?...

If my neighbour poked their head over my fence and asked my children what they were doing I would think they were rude and strange. I would never poke my head over my neighbours garden. Nor would I speak to their children (unless I knew them) when they werent around. I would advise you just go knock and have a word with the parents about noise levels.

Quoted out of context. The point being is telling the kids politely to be quieter....before it gets to a stage it turns into a complaint to their parents. What the kids are actually doing is irrelevant. It’s rude and strange to be so unaware / couldn’t give a shit and let your kids piss the neighbours to this extent. If my kids were being noisy sods right next the neighbours, and I wasn’t dealing it, I would think my neighbours would have every right to tell them to keep it down.... and would welcome that before it gets to the STFU stage. Thankfully I’ve managed to keep some degree of control over my 3 and it’s never come to this.

@Sorehandsandfeet while I can't be 100% certain that these children are neurotypical, I'd put money on it. I could hear their interaction between screeches, and while the shrieking wasn't usual play level, nor was it the sound that distressed or non verbal autistic children make. After 30 years of teaching those children I am very aware of those sounds, and the problems that parents of those children have regarding neighbours.

I am as certain as I can be that these were just loud kids whose parents didn't care abbot the noise themselves, nor the effect it would have on their neighbours.

I’m musing whether there is a tactful way of saying “welcome to the neighbourhood, lovely to have kids move in but is there any chance of toning the noise down a little, the screaming is giving me migraines...” possibly accompanied with some home baking and some kids activities (colouring, bubble wands etc)... try to get what you want and staying friendly?

It may not possible but from experience, it’s best to do anything you can to avoid becoming neighbour-enemies, and generally it’s better to tell someone about a problem, rather than seethe quietly until you actively hate them - they may not be aware of quite how bad it is to those who aren’t used to it.

@Rupertbeartrousers

I’m musing whether there is a tactful way of saying “welcome to the neighbourhood, lovely to have kids move in but is there any chance of toning the noise down a little, the screaming is giving me migraines...” possibly accompanied with some home baking and some kids activities (colouring, bubble wands etc)... try to get what you want and staying friendly?

It may not possible but from experience, it’s best to do anything you can to avoid becoming neighbour-enemies, and generally it’s better to tell someone about a problem, rather than seethe quietly until you actively hate them - they may not be aware of quite how bad it is to those who aren’t used to it.

I think some of that would be possible if they were next door neighbours and there was a more natural way to connect. But these people live on a different road where the gardens back on to the gardens of my road (and we all have high hedges). So I would never see these people or recognise them if I fell over them.

My neighbour 2 doors down has a screamer. The high pitched shrieking screaming type.
Happy kid - high pitch shriek
Sad kid- high pitched shriek
Bored kid- high pitched shriek.
Just a kid in a garden high pitched shriek for no fucking reason.
I counted 42 high pitched shrieks in 5 minutes yesrday morning at 7.45am whilst sat out having my morning cuppa.

At 3pm when I braved it enough to sit out for another cuppa the little shit was still shrieking away. Its quite sharp and nasty on the ears. I've no idea how the parents can tolerate it being alot closer than me.

Thier new lockdown puppy which isn't even a proper dog but some kind of rat with a high pitched yap doesn't seem so keen on the shrieking and yaps away in-between the shrieking. That in turn sets of next doors bored to tears, constantly left at home alone terrier with its barking and launching itself at their patio doors.

Then "I think I'm a drummer" over the back started on his drumkit, not long before the "we love crap music" family started thier early evening bbq and disco.

If there's one reason why I'm thankful my husband started fucking someone behind my back is that this will be last summer in this house. I've offered to move out, so he and his new vagina friend can move in and enjoy the neighbourhood from hell.

If it bothers you so much, get your house on the market and move away to a remote location where you won’t have to hear anyone!

Surely it’s normal for parents to check on the kids and tell them to calm down?
You'd think so, but the effect of habit coupled with getting a breather from sending them out and closing the windows and doors means that sadly, some parents don't.

We have them too and it's ruining our summer life. We are actually in speaking terms with the mum and she apologises for the noise, but never dies anything about it. After years of it, we've given up as nothing is going to make a difference. The only hope each coming summer is that it gets a bit better with them getting older. We're still hoping.

@cathybates

If it bothers you so much, get your house on the market and move away to a remote location where you won’t have to hear anyone!

Where have I said I don't want to hear anyone? I just don't want to hear two kids shrieking at each other for five hours. I've managed to own various homes in close proximity to other people for 40 years without finding their sounds an issue.

I think selling up after a single day night just me a bit premature anyway.

It will probably get better when more days out happen, holidays etc - they don’t have much else to do at the moment. I’m sick of my noisy next door neighbour but it’s improved since they can go out to pubs etc again!

If it bothers you so much, get your house on the market and move away to a remote location where you won’t have to hear anyone!
Of course, lets commute for one hour mornings and evenings to get to our jobs currently 5 mns away because some parents are too lazy to sort out their kids!

If I was you, I’d poke my head over the fence and say very loudly but pleasantly, ‘hi what are you doing? It’s quite loud, can you be quiet I’m trying to read, thank you!’ Keep it pleasant but firm

You cannot tell people to be quiet in their own gardens because you're reading that's ridiculous. You can ask people to keep the noise down if it's really loud and to stop shrieking for hours on end. But to expect people to be quiet so you can get on with your book is hilarious.

Completely agree with you, OP. Listening to children playing is one thing, continual shrieking for hours is a completely different thing.

My son who has several disabilities including autism has a very high pitched shriek that can go on for hours. Couldn’t give a flying shite if it pisses my neighbours off or not

Let’s hope you don’t have children!

That was to @dontdisturbmenow

My son never high pitched shrieked all day. I would have strangled him. Him and his friends played nicely. If the decibels increased or they needed to run and shout to burn off energy Id take them down to the park.
But sadly a lot of parents now are dog rough and selfish and bring their brats up to be as awful as them.

OP I’m with you. There are kids a few doors from us and I love hearing them giggling and the occasional shouts but kids next door, constantly shrieking - I’d be twitching after half an hour. I think I would go round and say something eventually. I bet all their other surrounding neighbours are fed up with it to.

Too not to!

My dog has been a little more barky than usual this week (and I don't mean hours on end, but a few happy barks 3 or 4 times a day) No doubt my back neighbour - who, unlike us, has a huge garden, and chose to put his home office right at the back of our teeny garden - is up in arms, as he previously complained about the dog and told us he expects the dog to be taken in every single time he barks even once as "he and his wife use their garden a lot and don't wish to be disturbed by needless barking".

This week he can go swivel because this week my teen has covid and the poor dog is not getting any walks as we are all in quarantine. This week the only exercise we can do is chuck the ball in the garden for the dog and this week the dog is like a coiled spring.

So anyone who thinks we are "allowing" our dog to bark this week can FOTTFSOF.

Before anyone suggests it: dog is a cavalier and hyper family loyal. Will not walk with anyone other than DH or myself. Simply plants his feet and won't move.