Sacked because I can’t stop sleeping

[desperateexhausted]

Posting here for traffic and NC because I’m ashamed and furious with myself.

So I haven’t been sacked but if I don’t get a handle on the problem I’m heading that way. I have a job with regular daytime hours (no horrible shift patterns, no very early starts or late finishes) and I can’t manage it.

A week of regular 9-6 work absolutely exhausts me to the point that I have in the past fallen asleep in my clothes the moment I got home, not eaten any dinner and slept through til the next morning several times a week. Some weekends I sleep for almost the entire 48 hours, emerging only to use the toilet or microwave a ready meal. I’ve had countless sick days (probably over 20) in the last year because I’m sometimes so tired that I can’t see straight, I feel nauseous and dizzy when I sit up and the fatigue is so overwhelming I feel like I’m being crushed.

I also sometimes (often) sleep through the morning and simply don’t turn up at work. I have two alarm clocks going off right next to my head and they don’t wake me, particularly if I’ve had a night of insomnia (which I also, somewhat ironically) suffer from. This has been going on since my teenage years (I’m now in my 30s) and affected every single job I’ve had - I’ve had probations extended, been sacked from freelance contracts, and now I’m on very thin ice at work. I’m outwardly a professional and successful person but I can barely hold down a job because I cannot stop sleeping and I’m at my wits end. Chronic fatigue has been mentioned by a previous doctor but wasn’t followed up for reasons beyond my control.

I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to live like this. I’m not exaggerating when I say it’s ruining my life and will ruin it even more if I lose my job (which, frankly, I deserve to). I don’t want special treatment from work, I know how ridiculous it sounds as a grown adult to say ‘sorry I slept through my alarm) 20 odd times a year. I would chop off a limb for an official diagnosis but every blood test I’ve had for the obvious possible reasons comes back completely clear (and I’ve had a lot of blood tests for this over the years).

Has anyone experienced similar and found a solution? It’s getting to the point that I’m terrified every time I go to bed on a weeknight that I won’t wake up when I need to, which in turn keeps me awake worrying, which then disrupts my sleep even further. Any advice would be very, very gratefully received.

Have you got a carbon monoxide detector?

I would insist on a referral to a sleep specialist or better still go private. The nhs loves to preach sleep hygiene and put people through CBT even when they have an obvious sleep disorder. My friend was similar to you and turned out she had non 24 hour sleep disorder. There’s various sleep disorders and if your diagnosed with one it will be much harder for work to sack you as well as it could possibly be treated

@AliceMcK have you had a sleep study? Mine took ages, 2 years from having the sleep study to getting the CPAP machine but it is a life saver (literally!)

This happened to a friend of mine. It was really severe - she was asleep literally the moment she got home. Wanting to sleep in conversations with people, etc.

It was a type of PTSD.

I used to be like this, and lost jobs and got kicked off educational courses for years until a thyroid problem was picked up in pregnancy. I have hashimotos disease (hypothyroidism) I’m on a high dose of levothyroxine and now it’s much more manageable. I do still sleep a lot a weekends and struggle with tiredness more than your average person, but for the most part it’s under control.

I was also coming on to say sleep apnoea

Def get a sleep study

[quote Heartofglass12345]@AliceMcK have you had a sleep study? Mine took ages, 2 years from having the sleep study to getting the CPAP machine but it is a life saver (literally!) [/quote]
Yes, 2 it all happened really fast. Both results inconclusive. I had 2 bad nights sleep. They want to follow up to see what’s next.

Nothing to add OP, but I really hope you get this sorted. To my non doctor brain it sounds so much like a sleep disorder, like you’re not getting proper sleep when you think you are. Good luck and go fight your corner! X

I'm wondering if you're having some sort of silent migraine issue with strong hormonal links... just a few of your other symptoms mixed with being exhausted is ringing alarm bells as I know someone with almost identical complaints and it turned out to be an endocrine issue that was triggering silent migraines that were exhausting her during the day without her even being aware they were happening. It's just an idea of course but might be worth mentioning the full range of symptoms to your gp and pushing for investigation into other possibilities because it sounds like you have been fobbed off so far which is entirely unacceptable

First thing back to gp and insist on sleep clinic referrral. You can do your overnight brain wave device at home these days. They have to rule out sleep disturbances first. You have to take your history of poor employment retention. State you cannot go on as you will become dependent on the state and unemployable
Poor sleep causes depression. Any mental health issues you have could be caused by this not the other way round.
If your boss knows it’s an issue or have evidence from previous performance issue take along a letter or document.
Push. Demand. Make an absolute nuisance of yourself until you get sleep clinic done
It’s discraceful that this isn’t the first port of call
💐

That’s really interesting @SylviaPlath1984 and I will actually mention hormones as that is something that’s crossed my mind, and hormonal problems run in the family.

I now have a private GP appointment booked for tomorrow morning! I was surprised there was availability on a Saturday but I’m really pleased there is - if anyone is interested I can update tomorrow after the appt.

Thanks again everyone, this has been super helpful.

@Jangle33

Nothing to add OP, but I really hope you get this sorted. To my non doctor brain it sounds so much like a sleep disorder, like you’re not getting proper sleep when you think you are. Good luck and go fight your corner! X

I have a niggling feeling it's not just a sleep disorder (it could be, however. I'm not a dr) rather it sounds like something actively exhausting her, rather than a lack of sleep? Not sleeping well would obviously cause some degree of tiredness but it does sound as though op IS sleeping, so I think it's something else that needs looked into such as CFS, ME or an endocrine issue.

You sound exactly like I was until two weeks ago when I got my CPAP. I thought I was an insomniac for years, progressively got worse and for the last year have fallen asleep actually on work calls and teams meetings. Luckily the calls were with close colleagues who knew I wasn't well and I'd already said my bit during the teams meeting (no video) so don't think I was missed. I woke up and was the only person still on the call! I was eating pretty much constantly just to stay awake

Had loads of blood tests, B12 supplements etc, then referred to the sleep clinic, which only took about three weeks to get an appointment. You get weighed, throat measured and given a device that's a bit like a watch with a sensor for one finger. I had to wear it for two nights and return to the hospital. I got a call within two days to confirm I was waking over 100 times an hour. I had no idea, just assumed it was insomnia/rubbish sleep. Got my CPAP two weeks ago and I'm like a new woman. No more daily naps, no falling asleep in the car whilst waiting for my other half to nip into the supermarket and no falling asleep at my desk. I have so much more energy and feel so much better. The mask is a ball ache to begin with. But sleep apnea is so dangerous, it worth the discomfort.

Anyway, this was a long winded way of saying push for a sleep test ASAP, even if it's just to rule apnea out. Hopefully you'll be seen quickly and see and improvement.

@desperateexhausted

That’s really interesting *@SylviaPlath1984* and I will actually mention hormones as that is something that’s crossed my mind, and hormonal problems run in the family.

I now have a private GP appointment booked for tomorrow morning! I was surprised there was availability on a Saturday but I’m really pleased there is - if anyone is interested I can update tomorrow after the appt.

Thanks again everyone, this has been super helpful.

That's great news!! Keep us updated, I'm sure I'm not the only one who wants to see you feeling better, it's no way to live and you deserve to have this seen to x

I would also suggest sleep apnea. I would wake out of breath, often with a sore throat and dry mouth.
Apologies if this has already been mentioned as I don’t have time to read the entire thread, but if you have or can borrow a recent Fitbit it will show your Estimated Oxygen Variation while you are asleep. High variations could indicate sleep apnea. I’m sure other fitness trackers/watches will do the same.

I’ve also recently started using a cpap machine which has totally changed my energy levels throughout the day. I didn’t have to wait long for a referral mainly because the doctors are not seeing people in the clinics because of COVID. Everything has been done by phone and video consultation and a sleep monitor was couriered to me and I am now on a trial using the cpap machine. The whole process only took a couple of weeks because they could ‘see’ so many people online each day rather than having a face to face appointment.

Seconding anyone who is suggesting a referral for a sleep study along with anything else.

It might be worth your while to look through

www.narcolepsy.org.uk/

and consider calling their helpline. They should be able to support you in advocating for yourself with your GP if necessary.

I've gone through the sleep all the time,it was my thyroid,& appears i don't process vitamin D very well, please get checked

OP I was very struck by this thread a few months ago. There may be other links in it too.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/4189536-vitamin-d-deficiency-awful-symptoms

This is my narcoleptic alarm clock
www.amazon.co.uk/Geemarc-Sonic-Bomb-Shaker-Version/dp/B000OOWZUK/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=bed+shaker+alarm&sprefix=bed+shaker+al&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1618608772&sr=8-3

It shakes the bed!!!

Chronic fatigue syndrome and Fibromyalgia

You need a sleep study. I’ve just had one - I’ve been tired forever.

I have just had sleep apnoea diagnosed and I’ve been waking nearly 30 times an hour without realising.

I snore etc but never really thought it was that bad. Doctor said the machine will be transformative. I cannot wait.

Or do you have a sleep apnoea

Have you got anything like a FitBit? It would be interesting to look at a week's records of your sleep.

Please let us know how it goes. It could be all sorts of things. I know someone with sleep apnoea who isn't overweight.

I don’t know what else work can realistically do - like I said, I don’t expect special treatment or sympathy as I know it’s unacceptable that it impacts on work so much.

It's effectively a disability, at least until it's sorted out. So no it's not 'unacceptable' how much it effects your work, as you can't help it, you're not doing anything 'bad' on purpose.

I hope you get some answers and a treatment that helps soon. xxx

You should absolutely be referred to a sleep clinic. You musrlt demand this. Say you don't feel your gp is understanding the gravity of the situation and the impact it is having on your life, they need yo refer. Your sleep hormones may need checking too you could have narcolepsy. Your GP isn't listening. If they wont act make a complaint and see a different GP.

People who are always excessively tired should be tested for apnea as standard. A sleep clinic will arrange this.