Aibu to not want my old bully doing well
Itsmeagainandagain · 13/04/2021 23:32
Came across an article in the local paperand it features an old bully who made life miserable doing well for himself. I actually wanted to scream in frustration. This man as a boy was at least 5 years older than me, would shout abuse at me, throw stones at me, call me names, I was a bloody 10 year old girl, I used to be scared to go outside and play, hiding behind hedges when I saw him in case I was called names or hit with stones.
Makes me uncomfortable seeing his ugly mug in the paper, after all these years. I'm already down today but this has made me feel worse.
Aibu about how I'm feeling?
saffire · 14/04/2021 00:03
There is really no point. Arseholes like that couldn't give a shit about what they did or how they treated others. By messaging and possibly getting a horrible response it just makes you feel worse.
DontBeRidiculous · 14/04/2021 00:44
I wouldn't contact him. He might not be any nicer than he ever was, and I wouldn't want him to know I still thought about him.
YANBU to be unhappy, but the best thing to do is to vent a bit (here or to someone you trust irl), then find something pleasant or amusing to distract yourself with. Clear your mind of him.
OliverBabish · 14/04/2021 00:52
I can appreciate how you feel OP - and I’m sorry he was such a twat to you.
People like that are rarely ever truly happy. That kind of behaviour comes from the perpetrators own negative thoughts and feelings. Things may look great for him on the outside (and in the paper) but you never know someone’s reality.
I don’t believe in karma, I just believe that if you are a shit then eventually someone who is a bigger shit is going to come along and fuck you up
WorraLiberty · 14/04/2021 00:59
Try thinking about it this way perhaps...
If you had an arsehole mother who raised you to think bullying was acceptable, you could have been the female version of him.
He was 15 and raised by a completely inadequate parent. Hopefully now he's an adult, he's learned not to be like her and just might deserve every success that comes his way.
I'm 52 and some of the arsehole bullies who went to my school have turned out to be very decent people, despite their awful upbringing.
YouWereGr8InLittleMenstruators · 14/04/2021 01:19
The boy who bullied, beat and sexually intimidated me relentlessly through primary school and secondary school pursued a career in violent crime and was brutally murdered on the other side of the world 20 years later.
When I found out, I struggled a lot with how to feel about it, so it could be said that the opposite of your title is also true.
I am so sorry you were bullied, and that you know how hard it is to get closure
MrsTerryPratchett · 14/04/2021 01:31
I'm sorry it happened
I found a bloke who tried to sexually assault me as a 15 year old on Linkdin. Doing very well for himself. But maybe his wife hates him, or his children. Maybe he's got massive painful itchy piles. Maybe he lies awake at night with anxiety.
Iamthewombat · 14/04/2021 01:38
Maybe he is a better person now. It happens. One of the hard case boys from the estate where I grew up completely changed. Stopped me in the street when I was 22, apologised for having been an arse when he was younger, told me he had gone back to college to do Alevels and wanted to train as a PE teacher.
JustGiveMeGin · 14/04/2021 08:01
One of my bullies went on to bea stripper in Blackpool, that made me chuckle 😆 Some did well, my point is that now I rarely think about them other than say a thread on here reminds me about it.
My point is, I am a different person now to the one that left school over 20 years ago and I imagine that the people that bullied me will be too.
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