Work one AIBU

[Covidbegone]

So I was asked to help out with a project months ago, but in the final stages, the editing down and smartening up stages. The people I’m helping have a reputation for being late to hand work in. The original lady who was liaising with them left her post before they got it to her. When she left she apologised to me and explained how long she’d been waiting and they were notorious for this.

Anyway new liaison lady comes on board. She gives them a deadline to work to. I go to her and explain that the deadline she has provided is in the middle of the Easter hols and I’ll be off as I have young kids. I ask if I can have the work a few days before as they will literally need the work on my return from A/L not leaving me any time to actually help out. This still leaves them a good few weeks to do the work. Anyway they complain they have not enough time. I advise them I can still help if they give me a day or 2 prior to leave.

A/L time arrives. I go on leave, no sign of the work. I return to work this week only to discover in the interim that the liaison lady has taken the job to my colleague who also has young children and is on A/L. My colleague however has done the work. I understand that that is her choice, however I feel completely undermined. It makes me look bad that I’m not willing to give up A/L for work, which tbf I’m not in this instance (they were given months and months to get something to me). I imagine that my colleague perhaps does not know the full story of repeated requests for work to be handed in by the original lady or myself. With all that in mind, would I be unreasonable to raise this with her? I just feel so undermined

At least they left you alone and didn't bother you while you were on leave.

TBH, if I was responsible for missing a massive project deadline, I would probably get a warning, never mind complaining that they had to get someone else in to do it for me. I have worked in some very harsh places (usually the ones with a HO in the US).

Hmmmm.

Surely this is simply about the fact your colleague has gone above and beyond (unwittingly or not) and as such looks great.
You- not so much.
Someone who is flexible and accommodating to needs is always going to be valued more highly by an employer.

The OP’s company were norming it by getting her colleague to do it. And that’s fine, but there seems to be a bit of a pile-on into the OP for resisting that norm.

I’ve cancelled weekends and evenings many many times, but I wouldn’t think much of my boss asking me to cancel planned leave, over Easter with my child, to deal with another team’s snafu, when I’d already flagged the problem. But I’m a single mother, so I’m probably seeing that through the perspective of that being completely unworkable for me.

Two things jump out at me from your posts.

1. Doesn't seem like you chased up at all when they didn't send you the info a couple of days before your AL. Seems like you just shrugged your shoulders and went off on Al
2. You should have raised it to your manager at least a week before you went off saying this info is going to come in when I'm on AL and needs doing before I'm back. They would have been able to plan better under this circumstance rather than panic when it comes in, and phoning your colleague who was also on AL

It's shit, but you sell your soul to the devil when you sign on the dotted lign with some companies.

There is some award system in the UK of the top 100 companies to work for. These usually have generally flexible working conditions. However, I don't know of any company where you could just ignore a deadline you're responsible for meeting and swan on out the door. You just can't. It's give and take.

Libelula21

Not really no. People are generally trying to explain how she left her employer with no choice but to find someone else to do it.

The OP’s company were norming it by getting her colleague to do it. And that’s fine, but there seems to be a bit of a pile-on into the OP for resisting that norm

I think you’ve misunderstood, and I mean that politely. No one is piling on her for resisting the norm and not working through her hols. She’s being told she’s being unreasonable for wishing to complain that someone else did and it makes her look bad.

It's not an insignificant project if it has taken months of work. It was obviously a big deal. I can't understand how the OP doesn't understand that somebody had to do it!

If the OP had organised for the project to be handed over to be handled by someone else, she would have shown leadership ability.

What she did instead was walk out the door, with ne'er a look back, completely ignoring the fact that an entire team had put months of work into this project and she would have been responsible for finishing it off. To have such an utter disregard for your duties as an employee shows that the OP isn't a very committed employee and that she doesn't understand the needs or demands of the industry that she's in.

OP I am a GP and workload and deadlines management is a huge part of our job (as is constantly being asked to do things in our own time, just one extra etc etc). I think you were totally in the right and your colleague will not have meant to undermine you although I see that you feel this may have happened unintentionally, she just has less strong boundaries around her workload than you and she will suffer for it if your employer is willing to disregard her leave! It won’t be their last request. And actually many employers will respect you more in this situation than her. Which is why they didn’t call you and beg you to do it, they knew you’d been reasonable and they messed up and had to find a way to sort it without involving you, and then probably bullied your poor colleague into it. You’re quite right to push back on unreasonable requests. Yes in work you can’t just swan out the door if there are deadlines to be met but you already said at the beginning that the only way you can meet the deadline is if they got it to you in reasonable time before annual leave. And they didn’t. Yes in an ideal world you’d have chased them but that is not actually your responsibility to do. I would see this as a victory, you set reasonable boundaries with your employer which they may well respect you for as this shows good prioritisation and workload/deadline management. And your employer respected it and asked someone else. No harm chatting with your colleague to say you’re horrified they asked her to mop this up and whether she’d consider banding together with you in future to just say no to unreasonable requests so that nobody’s leave isn’t invaded and they don’t try to take advantage of her or think less of you as a result (bet they don’t though, more like they see your colleague as the weak link who’ll just cave in to unreasonable demands and that does not win long term respect although may win some short term goodwill)

To answer a few more questions, yes I do have a DH. Yes he does help (not that that should answer part of this quandary). We both took leave together for a week which is the first time in aaaggggggeesss

I currently WFH and have done so for the whole of the pandemic, including many, many evenings where I’ve worked until even 3am to fulfill both my work contract and homeschooling. I am knackered, and possibly the reason I need my A/L more than ever, so to those who think I clock watch, well that’s a bit of a joke.

I can’t answer for my colleague as to why she chose to take on the work. I suspect it was down to the fact she wasn’t aware I’d been waiting many weeks for them to hand it to me and that I’d asked repeatedly for it and clearly explained my A/L dates to them.

I’ve been called difficult, children and hard work on here which is just lovely. Yes I said no to not working my A/L and yes I will have to live with the fact my colleague did work whilst on leave. I appreciate I’m completely replaceable, but I also agree some of the comments come across like a race to the bottom. Time is a precious commodity.

The OP doesn't appear to understand what deadlines are. The other team obviously had either other demands on their time or the work just wasn't achievable by the initial deadline. Presumably the liaison requested an extension which they received. I know it's hard when you're the finisher so to speak, but you simply can't say fuck it, they didn't get it to me in time and I had my AL and they were warned. Take a bit of initiative!

Mygardenisnotperfect Disagree with 90% of that. Yes, it's not ideal, but it is the real world.

” I can’t answer for my colleague as to why she chose to take on the work. I suspect it was down to the fact she wasn’t aware I’d been waiting many weeks for them to hand it to me and that I’d asked repeatedly for it and clearly explained my A/L dates to them”

Why is it you think if she had been aware of that she wouldn’t have done the work?

This is just getting odder and odder. So you will work till three am to do your job but are royally pissed someone else worked during leave to get something done that was required as it makes you look bad?

Honestly you’re being very silly indeed. I suspect you wanted to do this bit of work and are pissed you missed out and someone else did it and gets the credit, and even bigger credit because she came off hols to do it. Which makes her look like employee of the year.

Hi OP - no idea why you’re getting such a rough time on here. You did everything correctly- agreed to offer the support they needed - advised on your availability and chased to get the work to you on time. No one should be asked to work in their a/l unless it’s an absolute emergency - a project spanning several months with deadlines already moved is not that. I’d be concerned your colleague doesn’t have healthy boundaries and felt pushed into doing the work during -her a/l - which isn’t really acceptable. On that basis I’d check in with her - thank her for doing it and make sure she was able to take the time back to use on other days. I’d also be advising my line manager about the situation as it seems like the person running the project wasn’t really on top of things. I don’t think sticking to boundaries reflects badly on you at all.

Politeness always appreciated @bluntness100 said in my first two posts that this was likely nothing to do with anybody undermining anyone.

(I actually think the OP may have phrased her own AIBU post imperfectly)

So I’m really commenting on some of the stances taken in reply to her.

It would be interesting to know the views of the other colleague.

Maybe OP could have been more proactive but I thought I read that she had flagged it, when she asked for the work early.

My own company (French owned) has shown massive understanding and forbearance... that said, people are still getting up at 4am or working until 1am to get the work out the door. That’s why leave is so important!

That’s my piece, I’m not ignoring any replies, just busy now.

Bit of a drip feed there now OP. So you work until 3am, haven't have AL in ages etc. That is all relevant. If that's the case, they may well have left you in peace on your AL as they recognised your previous contributions.

Your colleague who ended up doing the work has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with you though. You didn't ask her to do it, you just left the project unfinished and didn't bother to escalate the issue of the deadline.

Can I ask how senior you are and what industry you're in?

a project spanning several months with deadlines already moved is not that.

On the contrary, it sort of is a priority, as it's months of work with an already extended deadline!

Sorry but I think people have forgotten that employment rights even exist in the UK which is very sad and reflective of our race to the bottom culture in the UK like OP says. Do you think a French person would tolerate this?! (No, no they would not). You DO have a right to undisturbed annual leave. It’s very concerning that others are so happy to give it up for free to their employer at the whim of the employer. Different to be willing to be flexible at YOUR convenience IF you want to and IF you are going to be paid extra for your extra work while supposed to be on leave. Just crazy that so many people think otherwise.

OP I’m totally backing you here! People really can’t just say oh it’s hard to be the finisher but it is what it is, it’s real life, and if you happen to be on annual leave when the work needs done then you just have to do it. What??! If you interviewed for a job and they told you these were the expectations would you take it? It’s very revealing IMO that her employer DIDN’T call her to berate her and get her to come in and do it but asked someone else to sort it. This is not a problem of OP’s making. Someone else hasn’t given her the work to do in time for her to do it before taking leave. That’s not actually her problem to sort although yes would have been nice to anticipate it/chivvy people along/delegate someone else in advance to sort I think if defintiely not going to get to her in time.

I swear to God I used to be the weak link colleague who would give in to such demands as I am a people pleaser and hate confrontation and yes don’t want to lose my job etc etc but honestly my colleagues and in particular my superiors have respected me much more for taking a harder line on this these days (which I’ve absolutely had to do to survive in life, as the NHS would happily work me to death 24 hours a day every day while paying me for a few hours a week if they had their way).

However we are clearly fighting a losing battle to have any quality of life or human rights to not be completely dictated to by our employers in every aspect of life in the UK if it’s just me and OP thinking this...

Facts are these.
OP didn't escalate issue of deadline being missed so went on AL knowing the deadline of a large project would be missed.
Employer found someone else to do it.
OP had a lovely uninterrupted break, colleague had to work through her AL.
OP thinks that this is unfair and wants to complain about colleague!

Mygardenisnotperfect

Totally wrong again!
What we're saying is
A. Her employer had the right to deny her AL at the time due to business requirements but they didn't.
B. OP left work without meeting an important deadline without having facilitated someone else getting the work done.
C. Employer had to call someone else in from AL to get the work finished.
D. OP wants to complain about the colleague, not about herself, or her management.
E. OP was not denied leave and was not disrupted at all.
F. OP has no regard for the work put in by the other employees in contributing to a major project and didn't care about all the work going to waste by not submitting the project on time.

Mygardenisnotperfect

It's like as if you're at work and there are two of you there and it's 5.30pm and there is one last patient to be seen. You have concert tickets which you've booked 9 months before and need to get home. They're your patient and they really need to be seen, but you just wander out the door and say nothing to anyone. The practice manager then asks the other colleague left (who has an anniversary dinner booked an also needs to get home) whether she will see the patient. She agrees to do so. You come in the next morning and complain that your patient was seen by your colleague.

What GreenWillow is suggesting that no one could book flights for a two week all inclusive holiday with any kind of confidence that they wouldn’t be told to cancel that holiday

It’s not me that’s suggesting it, it’s Parliament which has enacted it! (Well, it’s secondary legislation, but legislation nevertheless)

The fact is, nobody has the automatic right to Un disturbed AL.

Furthermore, there exists a very direct correlation between employee rights and unemployment levels in any given country - I’d be very careful what you wish for re: making comparisons with France!