Will the mum stay?

[Stillgardeningatthishour]

I’m a teacher but for the last few years have been at home with my toddler son. I met up with some new mum friends and one was looking for a nanny/sitter/childminder for her son a few days per week. We met and had a chat and have agreed on days and times he’ll come to me. She said for the first visit (tomorrow) it’s better to come only for an hour or two, so he can get used to the new environment, I agree.
Would you take this as she’s dropping him off at the house and leaving, to see how he goes, or coming and staying with him?
I have no coffee or biscuits/cakes in and wondering if I need to make a very early morning dash to the shops!
Would you leave your toddler Ds the first time like that? Or do you think she’s planning on staying the whole time to be around him?
‘I’m aware I can just ask her, but seems a bit rude or just not going with the flow really.

Soooo...should I buy some Jaffa cakes 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'm not sure. Sounds a bit vague, but you don't need to provide her with refreshments if she chooses to stay.

Are you a registered childminder?

Are you in the U.K.? It’s not legal to look after a young child in your own home unless you’re a registered childminder.

@underneaththeash 🙄I’m not in the U.K., it’s legal where I am. I have over 20 years of childcare experience, including teaching and degrees in child development.

@1Morewineplease It’s all fairly relaxed, we’re sort of friends through our mums group, if she stays whilst they play in the garden, I’ll obviously be wanting to provide some form of drinks and snacks 🤷🏻‍♀️

I assume she'll be dropping, otherwise what's the point? Anyway the most you need to provide on an hour visit is a cup of tea or coffee.

@underneaththeash

Are you in the U.K.? It’s not legal to look after a young child in your own home unless you’re a registered childminder.

Eh? I presume you mean for money.

I’d just go with the flow, though you might need some kind of snack and drink for the child.
Hope it goes ok!

Is the first visit within the times you have agreed? If so I expect she will leave. If it's just a case of shall we have a trial on Tuesday she'll probably stay.

OP, I’d expect her to leave.

I'd probably expect to stay some of the time, then leave for a bit myself. Some toddlers are easy to leave though and others aren't. I wouldn't expect a biscuit but maybe a coffee would be nice.

I'd expect her to stay. I stayed with mine when they had their settling in sessions. She can't just drop her child with a stranger who knows nothing about him, surely? Won't she want to chat to you/you to her about his likes/dislikes/routines/food preferences, etc?

I think she will leave otherwise what are you testing?
His reaction to being in your home with his mum? Seems a bit pointless.

Jaffa cakes 🤤. Get some anyway!

Sounds like a settling in session to me so would assume she will leave him with you.

Get the Jaffa cakes though, win win when she doesn't stop and you can eat them all 😍

@BeingATwatItsABingThing Great name 🤣

@EasterEggBelly I know, but equally I’m not sure I’d just drop and leave 🤔

@Beseigedbykillersquirrels Yes, I thought that. I mentioned the routines of milk, snacks etc during messages and she answered about it but said we can talk more

Yes - I did mean for money!
OP I’d get the biscuits in, she’d most likely stay for a bit.

[quote Stillgardeningatthishour]@underneaththeash 🙄I’m not in the U.K., it’s legal where I am. I have over 20 years of childcare experience, including teaching and degrees in child development.[/quote]
Then asking her quite an important question wouldn't be rude at all would it?

It would be professional.

Jaffa cakes...nope, unless she hasn't eaten this month. Bleurgh!

I would assume she's dropping him off otherwise it's just another play date 🤷🏻‍♀️

@Cipot I think that’s probably what I’d do if the situation was reversed. Stay initially and then sort of casually let Ds know I’m going for a bit 🤷🏻‍♀️To stay for the whole 1.5 to 2 hrs seems a bit 😬we met up with the kids last Thursday too.

@Ellpellwood Well, we agreed we’d do two days per week and set the hours. One of these days is a Tuesday. When we’d set the hours/days that suited us both, she said that was great, but maybe it was best to start off on the first day just for 1.5-2 hrs so Ds could ease into the new environment, which I agreed with, then thought today..’Oh, I wonder if she’s staying too and I should diet bits out for everyone etc

@WorraLiberty It’s not really an important question, she’s very laid back, so I’m willing to take her lead and am happy if she’d like to stay for a bit or leave..I just wanted to be prepared for both options