My 13yo (almost 14) was packing yesterday as he was staying with his best friend at their caravan next week. Anyway I was helping him take his bags downstairs - there was a bag I thought he hadn't used for packing but it looked very full so I opened it to see if it had his clothes in. On opening I saw a floral pattern and in the moment thought it was an item of his sister's clothing and took it out as it shouldn't have been in there. But it turned out to be a women's dress. So I put it back in there and closed the bag. I then came downstairs and explained to my son why I'd looked in the bag and asked him pleasantly "what were all those clothes in there?'. He looked very uncomfortable and seemed to not know what to say and then said something very vague like they belong to a friend. He then went upstairs and later when I was in the room I saw he had 'hidden' the bag in his wardrobe. It wasn't well hidden - I didn't search for it - when I went to close the wardrobe doors I saw it on a shelf with a hoodie over it.
I'm really stuck on if I should do something or just leave it. Of course he is of the age where he should be given privacy. But I thought I'd brought him up to be able to tell me anything but obviously that's not the case. I just feel worried about why he is being secretive with me and if he can't talk to me about something as little as some clothes what else will he keep secret from me? He is my eldest so this is my first experience of teen behaviour and I'd appreciate some advice! Should I just leave it or try to have a chat to him about it?
YABU - just leave it
YANBU - try to have a chat about it