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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

School want DD to go to a childminder

99 replies

RosieLemonade · 12/04/2021 12:36

My DD is 4 and goes to a school nursery 830 till 12 every day. I only work part time so I can pick her up Monday and Tuesday. My mum has her Friday. DH had been working from home and had her Wednesday and Thursday. Not ideal but similar to lots of WFH parents. However he is now back working in the field so to speak.
DD's great grandparents have offered to have her on those two days. Previous to covid they had her on those days anyway. They are both fully vaccinated plus 3 weeks.
However school has said that as my mum is my childcare bubble then they cannot allow DD to go with them. It needs to be a professional. I am unlikely to find a CM who can go pick her up at lunch time. Also it is something else to pay out for which I wasn't expecting. AIBU to feel a bit annoyed?

OP posts:
NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 12/04/2021 15:37

The school probably prefer CMs because actually CMs tend to pick up several kids from the same school. So instead of introducing 2 new very elderly/vulnerable adults into the mix at the school gate, the child is collected by a CM already collecting her classmates. Overall it reduces the variety of people at the school gate.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 12/04/2021 15:39

Sorry but my view would be pay for childcare for your child. Grandparents doing regular child care is too much, but great grandparents is ridiculous!!! How old are they?

How is this any of anyone's business but the great grandparents'?

Because if I was the school I would be way more worried about something being passed to a high risk couple in their 80s (for example) than a younger lower risk CM. I dont know to what extent the school bear any responsibility for how well parents adhere to distancing/hygiene guidelines at pick up

knitonedropone · 12/04/2021 15:40

Ridiculous. The ASC my friend works at would allow this as long as they know the person and it's not a different person each day. YANBU.

Notavegan · 12/04/2021 15:41

Bonkers. I'd probably ignore them and notify of the collection arrangements

Floralnomad · 12/04/2021 15:45

It’s a bonkers rule . I’ve only read the posts by @RosieLemonade so this may have been suggested but could the great grandparents also collect on Friday and then drop her off at your mums .

Ofallthethings · 12/04/2021 15:46

The school might be right about the covid rules , as in you can only have one bubble, but I don't think they can stop you doing it, they're not the police. I would make whatever arrangements you need to and just advise who will be collecting your DD.

shouldistop · 12/04/2021 15:54

How would they even know who was looking after her? Tell them your work patterns have changed if they ask

ChikiTIKI · 12/04/2021 16:02

Can't they collect her outside in a group of less than 6 people?

RosieLemonade · 12/04/2021 16:07

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

Sorry but my view would be pay for childcare for your child. Grandparents doing regular child care is too much, but great grandparents is ridiculous!!! How old are they?

How is this any of anyone's business but the great grandparents'?

Because if I was the school I would be way more worried about something being passed to a high risk couple in their 80s (for example) than a younger lower risk CM. I dont know to what extent the school bear any responsibility for how well parents adhere to distancing/hygiene guidelines at pick up

I completely understand your point but would like to reiterate that they are both 3 weeks past 2nd vaccination. We also live in an area with 10/100000 cases so on the lower end.
OP posts:
FrangipaniBlue · 12/04/2021 16:08

@Jumpers268

I don't understand? So they won't release your child to your grandparents, but they will release your child to a childminder? Surely the risk is the same?
I would say (as someone who has spent 20+ years as a risk professional) that releasing her to a childminder is higher risk, because there are more potential contacts.......
FrangipaniBlue · 12/04/2021 16:12

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

Sorry but my view would be pay for childcare for your child. Grandparents doing regular child care is too much, but great grandparents is ridiculous!!! How old are they?

How is this any of anyone's business but the great grandparents'?

Because if I was the school I would be way more worried about something being passed to a high risk couple in their 80s (for example) than a younger lower risk CM. I dont know to what extent the school bear any responsibility for how well parents adhere to distancing/hygiene guidelines at pick up

It's not for the school to either concern themselves with nor manage the risk of the OPs grandparents catching Covid.
tiredmum2468 · 12/04/2021 16:16

My 2 go to a childminder 1 is in reception and one goes half days school nursery and I have no issues, the school is being awkward

Ask them to suggest a solution and if it incurs a cost bat it back to them!!

MeltsAway · 12/04/2021 16:28

However school has said that as my mum is my childcare bubble then they cannot allow DD to go with them

The school is following the law. You don't seem to be ...

Oblomov21 · 12/04/2021 16:42

This bizarre situation is so irritating. I hope you can legally find a way to finish such nonsense.

TeddingtonTrashbag · 12/04/2021 16:45

An’t you just say the grandmothrr is s childminder? How would they know she wasn’t?

Dixiechickonhols · 12/04/2021 16:58

Options are switch nursery. Mine started a new one at school she was going to after Easter she was 4 and it worked well even though only one term.
Tell them you are living with mum so one household, great grandparents are now childcare bubble.
All those commenting on age my mum is 75 and perfectly capable of minding one 4 year for a few hours she would love it, by time home had lunch done some baking, craft or pottering in garden it will be home time.

AppropriateAdult · 12/04/2021 17:00

@MeltsAway

However school has said that as my mum is my childcare bubble then they cannot allow DD to go with them

The school is following the law. You don't seem to be ...

No, the school is attempting to enforce the law, which is a completely different matter. This is a massive overstep.
MeltsAway · 12/04/2021 17:07

But surely, the school is trying to do what they can to contain spread of infection, by asking the parents of one of their pupils to follow the current law ?

They are looking out for all their pupils in their care by doing this.

Topseyt · 12/04/2021 17:11

Oh ffs, this is utter twattery and needs to stop right now. All this "bubbling" ridiculous and makes life impossible for so many people.

I think the school are overstepping massively here and I would be tempted to tell them so. Tell them that these are your only available childcare arrangements, they are perfectly legal as far as you can see and you expect them to abide by them.

grannyfan1 · 12/04/2021 17:16

School being very unreasonable. You’re child is going to have contact with a childminder then anyway so no risk is minimised-in fact for all they know of need to know the great grand parents are their childminders!

Nala82 · 12/04/2021 17:17

The school is wrong on how they understand the law.

Gatherings of 2 or more indoors are illegal unless an exception applies. A linked childcare household is an exception.

Gatherings of 6 are legal outside regardless.

Presuming the grandparents collect the child outdoors they are breaking no laws at the time of collection.

If they decide to go indoors later that would be:
A. illegal
B. none of the school's business

starfishmummy · 12/04/2021 17:20

@yomommasmomma

Sorry but my view would be pay for childcare for your child. Grandparents doing regular child care is too much, but great grandparents is ridiculous!!! How old are they?
Why do you assume they are old and incapable?
skeggycaggy · 12/04/2021 17:43

@Nala82

The school is wrong on how they understand the law.

Gatherings of 2 or more indoors are illegal unless an exception applies. A linked childcare household is an exception.

Gatherings of 6 are legal outside regardless.

Presuming the grandparents collect the child outdoors they are breaking no laws at the time of collection.

If they decide to go indoors later that would be:
A. illegal
B. none of the school's business

Plus, it is now legal for a child to go from school to a gathering of up to 15 children doing an organised event. They could be in a different extra curricular group every day, but heaven forbid their grandparents try to pick them up Hmm
jazzandh · 12/04/2021 20:10

I assume you are paying for the services from this provider?

Stand your ground - this is a non-issue.

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