To move dc school again so I can afford to buy a better house

[fluffypinkcarpets]

We sold our house last year and are currently renting. Everything has been an absolute nightmare since.
Dc is in year 3 and at their second school which they moved to in year 2. The move was tough and dc was quite unsettled for a while.

We moved to this area because prices were more affordable than our old area and we were looking at much nicer properties than what we sold. Then dh lost his job but managed to get a new one thank goodness but on much lower pay.

This coupled with house prices increasing at an astronomical rate now means we are now priced out of the properties we originally thought we'd be buying.

Now dh has been told by work he only needs to be in London max 2 days a week with no international travel the rest wfh. This is so good compared to how it used to be he was never home. I'm also wfh so we want to get a nice home that we can enjoy being in much more but can only achieve this on our budget by moving to a different county, which means moving schools again. Our only dc has said please don't do this to me again it is too hard to go to a new school again.

It's the only thing that's making me take a step back. Anyone done this? I feel bad. They'd be going into year 4. If we don't do this it means moving to a worse house than what we had before and in an area we aren't even that keen on now as a result.

Don’t dismiss his concerns and don’t assume everything will fine. Going slightly against the grain, I found moving mid year was actually easier than moving in September. When teachers are getting to know a new class, they can just assume children know all the rules and systems of the school already so you may get no induction process at all. If you start in mid-year, you’re a new face and people are instinctively more likely to help.

That said, the biggest difference was between joining a bad school and a good one. If the head teacher’s a human being who thinks children are human beings, then that’s a good start. If you look for a school good pastoral support, then you know it’ll be there if you need it.

I think the idea of a through school is a good one in your circumstances, but also worth trying to find out about schools with a large cohort that tends to feed in to one catchment secondary. About 90% of children from our primary go on to the same secondary, so there’s a lot more continuity than in some other areas.

I guess my advice would be based on what 'a less good house' was for you?

Are we talking the difference between a two-bed terrace and a three bed detached with large garden?

I think I would want to put my dc first and compromise on the house for a few years, before moving.

Its important to make sure you also review the high schools as it would be a shame to move to another school only to find you are not happy when they get to high school with your options.

@ittakes2 yes I have been doing this and would be moving with an aim to go to a nice secondary school. The whole point in us moving was to give dc a nice life whilst at the same time owning a nice house in nice area.
Same situation for a lot of people except our situation changed drastically beyond our control.

The rug has been pulled out from under a lot of people’s plans in the past year. Your son may not be the only new child in the class - so many families are relocating for various reasons.

Good point at @Medianoche I think I'll ask schools this when I phone up about places too. Perhaps there are others in our situation as well. If there's more than one new dc in the class I think this could help make the decision too.

It's the best thing for the long term. Delay again and prices may rise again. We made the mistake of being too picky and prices rocketed out of our price range. Also had to do a major move. DC will adjust and appreciate a better home and available parents.

It’s all about the ‘sell’ to your children with any big decision. Don’t let them feel like there’s a choice that you have to make as this then makes it worsen as they feel that you could have chosen to not move. Just state that you’re moving house nearer the time. The uncertainty is unsettling for kids so just let them know when they need to know.
Ideally move schools mid year so that there’s not 6 weeks of anticipation of a new school for them.
Just get in with it as you know what’s best for your family. It has to be done and putting it off will just make it more difficult.
Good luck.

Yes I only asked my dc how they would feel about moving schools which is how we know they don't want to, it's definitely not their decision and my opinion is we have to do it but dh is talking me down saying he can't hear dc being sad about another move.
But I don't feel there's much choice without making huge sacrifices and ending up in a home that is not suitable for us wfh more and dc will be worse off in the long run. It's all so difficult but such is life!

Ultimately I would do what I feel is best for the family but I would really consider my child's feelings. I've found that by year 4 the friendships are very "set" and it's really hard for new children to make a group of friends after the initial excitement of someone new

@Nicucrackers

Ultimately I would do what I feel is best for the family but I would really consider my child's feelings. I've found that by year 4 the friendships are very "set" and it's really hard for new children to make a group of friends after the initial excitement of someone new

I don’t think that this is true at all. Friendships change all the time with a really large shift at secondary school.

If you're renting and the lease is terminated at short notice, you could well end up moving and needing to change schools anyway.
Be aware of child's concerns - but if you're in the UK and child has been out of school for the best part of the last year anyway, I'd go for the long term stability of owning rather than renting.

How far away away was area 1, then distance to area 2 and where you think you might end up?

I would investigate the move, see if it's reasonably possible and then make decisions once you have mortgage,potential house, primary school and follow on secondary

However if the current area has a good primary and great secondary I would stay in the area. A great house isn't worth so much upheaval. What are the specific difference in houses?

I suspect if you ask any child whether they want to move schools they would say no. If you are renting staying in the same house is not a given anyway, do could end up moving anyway. Better to get long term security for the family now. Involve your dc in a wish list of what they would like from new home, eg walking distance to school, (likely to be closer to friends) large garden, extra big room as den for his mates to enjoy, decorated to dc choice... A positive spin could make dc embrace the move. Don't present it as a choice, more of let's make the best of this, with reassurance that it is a long term option, unlike now. Parenting involves hard decisions for the long term.

Yes I'm poring over what's on the housing market and stock is low, prices are too high and I just can't see anything changing soon.
The difference will be between buying a large detached houses with land vs a semi with a small garden and small everything in a higher crime area, originally we could afford to live in the nicer area close to us in a detached house with garden but prices have shot up and even surrounding semi detached in the nice area are becoming a stretch with our budget and selling quickly.

We originally moved to get away from a crime ridden area and living in a semi that was small and now we could end up being forced to live that way again if we stay just for the school but having lost a lot of money and acquiring a higher mortgage all of which isn't too appealing.

Honestly OP in that circumstance having already moved unless we are talking regular knife crime I would buy the semi.