AIBU to want to move for covid safety

[Lulu1027]

I am nearly five months pregnant and live in a high-rise apartment (17th floor) in the US. As such, I cannot access the outdoors without using the elevator. In the past months, I've become increasingly concerned about being exposed to the virus in the elevator and have had a few run-ins with people who were not masked. Moreover, at least one of the elevators frequently breaks, causing crowding. The vaccine is being strongly advised for pregnant women in America, but, since pregnant women were excluded from the trials, I cannot, in good conscience, take it. My state has been particularly effective in the vaccine rollout, and I realize that I will soon be an outlier in choosing not to be vaccinated. I suspect that covid protocols will likely change in the next month and that masking will become less common. Distancing has already fallen by the wayside. I don't blame anyonewe are all desperate to feel normalbut I'm in a particular situation and need to adjust for it. For my mental and physical health, I need to take a daily walk and haven't been doing so to minimize my time in the elevator. After a year of isolation, the loss of this outlet has been painful. Therefore, I would like to move to a neighboring building, that would allow me access to the stairwell. I've presented my husband with several reasonable options and he has shot them all down. He refuses to believe that I could be exposed in the elevator or that I'm at any greater risk as a pregnant woman. He has also berated me for my choice not to take the vaccine. Am I crazy here? AIBU to feel that I need to adjust for the unprecedented conditions of the pandemic to ensure a safe pregnancy?

It's a huge upheaval to move, I don't blame DH for being reluctant.

Whilst no pregnant women were included in the pre-approval trials for obvious ethical reasons, there have now been lots of pregnant women who have had th vaccine because for their specific cases the risks of not being vaccinated outweighed the potential risk of vaccination. If there had been any serious additional risks for pregnant women or for their unborn children, that data would have been discovered and publicised by now. The huge amount of publicity that is being given to the fact that there have been 70ish cases of blood clots among 40million ish vaccine recipients demonstrates that even tiny additional risks are getting plenty of publicity.

Nothing is ever risk-free, no pregnancy is risk-free, moving home to a different building wouldn't be risk-free either. you can only ever do the bet you can in the situation you are in. I would suggest you talk with your physician about the specific risks you are worrying about and reconsider your decision not to have it.

It’s safe to have the vaccine in pregnancy. Moving is a huge upheaval when you could just have the vaccine. So I can see your husband’s point.

I think YABU.

YABU to move, you are not being unreasonable to have reservations about the vaccine in your personal situation. I think I’d have it if I were you, but I respect your feelings.

I do think it’s lunacy to be considering moving home because of a few mins in an elevator!

Thanks for your feedback, everyone. It's helpful to hear objective points of view. My husband and I have reached a compromise: we will stay here but will increase our ppe while in the elevator. He will also ask people not to join us. One of the major reasons I'm conflicted about the vaccine is the fact that guidance is not uniform all over the world. As I understand it, in the UK and EU pregnant women who are not healthcare or essential workers are largely advised to wait until after they give birth. There's no evidence that it isn't safe in pregnancy, but also no evidence that it is. Clinical trials are underway, but I likely won't benefit from that knowledge. I'm by no means an anti-vaxer, but these factors make me feel like a guinea pig.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.standard.co.uk/news/world/woman-china-infects-71-lift-elevator-coronavirus-a4496996.html%3famp

That article just incase anyone thinks you’re mad. I’m not sure I would want to move just for the duration of a pregnancy, how far into it are you? I would use the elevator with an n95 mask and wash your hands after touching the button and not move

Thanks, DaisyDreaming, It's good to know I'm totally off nuts here. An update: Just as I was feeling confident in the compromise I reached with DH, building management just notified us that two of three elevators are out of order this weekend. This is the problem. I'm not overly concerned about elevators in general, it's the ongoing maintenance problem with these particular elevators. Now approximately three hundred apartments will have to use one elevator. Looks like I'll have to keep busy indoors.

Oops, apologies for the typo. "Off nuts" is not an American expression! That should read "I'm not totally nuts here."

You can’t ask people not to join you in the lift. That’s crazy. Are you very very vulnerable? Or is this health anxiety?

I've already had people ask me not to join them in the elevator, so it's not unheard of. In the circumstances, I was happy to oblige.

I think yabu. And a bit extreme. It could take you months to sell up and move too.

If I was in your position I would want to move too, would also be a lot easier when you have a baby if the lift keeps breaking down. Does it have to be another apartment building? Is there anyway you could avoid stairs/lifts completely?

I would like to move to a neighboring building, that would allow me access to the stairwell.

Why is the stairwell not accessible in your current building?

we will stay here but will increase our ppe while in the elevator.

How... just what PPE did you deploy before and what would the 'increase' mean you would be doing in future?

It's not feasible to use the stairwell in my current building because I'd have to walk seventeen flights to get outside. I could do that now but won't be able to in a few months. I tried to find a unit on a lower level of our building but was unsuccessful. There was a perfect apartment available on the first floor but it's next door to a hoarder, and frankly, the smell was unbearable. I've been double masking but am buying a helmet to cover my whole head. It's equipped with hepa filters, which the CDC states are capable of filtering covid particles. I'll wear a regular mask underneath and take off the helmet when I get outside. Seems silly but I don't feel like I have many options. My DH says no one will want to get in the elevator with us anyway when they see us dressed like Daft Punk.

Ok so this is a joke post. I see.

Not at all! Desperate times call for desperate measures. Just trying to get through the next few months, preferably with a sense of humor.

Can you supply Link to the helmet with HEPA filters, OP? I am curious what such a fancy object costs.

I would walk 17 flights of stairs at 41 weeks pregnant in preference to being stuck at home all day.

ps: do you also have link to where CDC says that HEPA can filter out covid particles? I did not know about that.

A helmet?! Cmon OP, you’re being ridiculous

@Allwokedup

You can’t ask people not to join you in the lift. That’s crazy. Are you very very vulnerable? Or is this health anxiety?

Yes you can ask people not to join you in the lift. Most lifts in the UK now have a number limit, often marked by those footprint stickers places in the corners, so people stay as far away from each other as possible. I have a number of times said "sorry, you'll have to wait for the next one" when people have tried to get in, and everyone has accepted it so far.

At home, I'm on the 8th floor, and my neighbours and me wait for the lift if anyone else is using it first.

Believe me, I know the helmet is ridiculous. My mom has had quite a laugh at my expense. Easy for her to say- she wasn't pregnant during a pandemic while living in high-density housing! But this is the best compromise I've come to with DH. It allows me to feel a bit safer in our current living situation, while still getting outside. This is my first pregnancy, so I don't know how I'll feel in the next few months. Is it possible to walk 17 flights while heavily pregnant? For what it's worth, here's the helmet, and it's not cheap: microclimate.com/. Regarding the HEPA filters, the CDC states:
"HEPA filters are no less than 99.97% efficient at capturing human-generated viral particles associated with SARS-CoV-2." For more info see: www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/community/ventilation.html

$300 for this.

Does that $300 include FIT testing instructions & equipment (OSHA style)?

What are you gonna do after baby is born to keep baby away from covid when using the lifts?

Op seek help for your anxiety.

This has to be a joke

Thanks for your comment ArcheryAnnie. That's part of the problem. Due to frequent elevator breakdowns, people are frustrated and no longer respect the number limit. Still considering what we will do when the baby is born. Perhaps a tiny helmet :) We will probably be looking for a house at some point. We've discussed doing so now but there is nothing affordable in the area where we currently rent. Therefore, I'd have to hastily leave the ob-gyn that I know and trust, which doesn't seem like a good idea. I've explored local house rentals and month-to-month vacation rentals but they are exorbitantly expensive.