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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Does anyone else ever feel like this?

51 replies

DressesWithPockets · 09/04/2021 18:33

Last day of Easter holidays. Kids are nearly 4 and nearly 7. I'm so tired I've spent a lot of the day lying down while they play.

At first I thought I must be ill, I felt so dreadful. But other than being so tired I could cry (and a bit achy) I've no other symptoms.

Kids sleep through fine and I share parenting 50/50 with my husband, so I don't know why I feel so run down. All I can think is it's the stress of a whole year of Covid, homeschooling, being in each other's pockets (we both wfh atm) all the time suddenly taking its toll.

Does anyone ever feel like this? Inexplicably just exhausted? If someone told me I could go to bed for the weekend I'd do it.

OP posts:
Merryoldgoat · 09/04/2021 18:35

I do too OP. I’ve done next to nothing today and I’m half asleep on the sofa. It’s ridiculous.

Original poster
DressesWithPockets · 09/04/2021 18:37

Glad it's not just me although sorry to hear you feel the same

OP posts:
JackieTheFart · 09/04/2021 18:42

Yes I quite often feel like this at the moment.

I’m the type that doesn’t get stressed - except I do, I just don’t really realise until I spend practically an entire weekend in bed with migraine that heals to a low-level headache.

Dontbeme · 09/04/2021 18:43

Same here, just feel dead on my feet. I have a plan to prep and cook tomorrow so on Sunday just have to shove dinner in the oven, pajamas on all day, films lined up for sofa day and fire ready to be lit as it's forecast cold and rainy here. Cannot wait to just snooze all day.

hopingforabrighterfuture2021 · 09/04/2021 18:45

Yes, I had this the other day! Hope you feel better soon.

Original poster
DressesWithPockets · 09/04/2021 18:47

Thanks. I think it must be Covid. I love my kids but I never wanted to be a SAHM - I need to get out of the house and I need to do something other than be with my kids. I didn't enjoy mat leave really for these reasons, and I've not much enjoyed being stuck in the house for the last year either. I think it's just worn me down, even though I'm getting enough sleep etc.

OP posts:
SatsumasOrClementines · 09/04/2021 18:49

Are you sure you’re not anaemic? Have you had your iron, vitaminD, B12 levels checked recently?

Treaclepie19 · 09/04/2021 18:50

I feel exactly the same. I have a 5 year old and a 6 month old.
Going to phone the doctors Monday and rule out anything else because today I could just sleep the day away.

Bluntness100 · 09/04/2021 18:52

Could you be depressed?

Original poster
DressesWithPockets · 09/04/2021 18:55

@Bluntness100

Could you be depressed?
Possibly. I mean, the being at home for a year thing is really getting to me now. But I don't feel miserable in my head, if you know what I mean. I'll monitor it though. I had PND so I know what it feels like to wake up and dread another day, and I'm not there at the moment.
OP posts:
Original poster
DressesWithPockets · 09/04/2021 18:56

@SatsumasOrClementines

Are you sure you’re not anaemic? Have you had your iron, vitaminD, B12 levels checked recently?
Good point. If it doesn't improve I'll look inti getting it tested.
OP posts:
Cam2020 · 09/04/2021 18:58

I have phases if this. I thinks it's partly the stress if the last year, general demotivation and a lack of getting out and about.

Original poster
DressesWithPockets · 09/04/2021 19:02

@Cam2020

I have phases if this. I thinks it's partly the stress if the last year, general demotivation and a lack of getting out and about.
Yes that's it exactly.

I feel pretty guilty, like I'm being a rubbish mum for lying on the sofa when they want my attention.

OP posts:
Original poster
DressesWithPockets · 09/04/2021 19:02

And then asking my husband to do more than his usual share of bedtime etc while I go to bed myself.

OP posts:
Cottagepieandpeas · 09/04/2021 19:03

I often feel like this, but I put it down to peri-menopause (I’m probably a lot older than you!).

Original poster
DressesWithPockets · 09/04/2021 19:05

Hmm I'm 41 so not totally impossible, but no other signs so far

OP posts:
PlayItCool · 09/04/2021 19:18

I've been feeling like this. I think the aches are from muscle tension due to stress and just generally tired and fed up. I feel more tired when I get up in the morning than I do at bedtime! But forcing myself to get out for a walk and do some stretches really helps

MysteriousMonkey · 09/04/2021 19:26

Me too, my motivation is all gone and I just want to stay in bed until they go back to school.... Sadly I can't... Probably Hmm

Sooverthis1 · 09/04/2021 19:41

Yes, 3 dcs 4, 6 and 9 and absolutely exhausted all the time. I have days where it's ok and then other days where I literally don't have any energy. I have to have a clean and tidy house so can't do the whole let it all go for a day or so, i can't relax in a messy space.

My dcs have bags and bags of energy too and are very loud. I'm naturally quite introverted. There's no end in sight either as we have never had family help or support so that won't change after the pandemic. I work 6am until 12 and then have to pick up my youngest (there's no option to add hours and a big shortage of childcare here and anyway it would be too complicated and expensive with older ones finished at a different time) and then pick up older ones a little later. We adore our kids but never, ever get a break. We give each other time though and swap over.
I try to eat healthily, I run a bit most weeks and thankfully they are finally (after years of sleep deprivation) sleeping really well. I had anemia before but take iron, could you get your bloods checked op? I sometimes worry that I'm ill as sometimes I'm so tired I know that I could sleep for a whole weekend. My dh says we could literally sleep a whole week and need it. I do sometimes add up the hours and we are often on the go 16 hours a day, my dcs don't chill a lot so it is soooo exhausting although they do play together but there's always something to do. I just don't know if it's the whole situation or just life with relatively young kids.. I do try and go for extremely early nights like same time as the kids a couple of times q week and this does make a huge difference , do you go to bed early?

Sooverthis1 · 09/04/2021 20:05

Tbh my mother was a very hard worker and ran a busy house and worked and I remember her lying on the couch. I remember being happy out playing around her and genuinely being happy that she was resting. Absolutely nothing wrong with it and if anything it teaches kids about self-care. Sometimes my dcs get overtired but don't naturally know how to chill so when they see me rest the cuddle up with me and rest too. Its lovely, there's nothing wrong with you having the odd chill day.

Flowers24 · 09/04/2021 20:07

Yep, always exhausted atm

HikeForward · 09/04/2021 20:07

Yes, but I have an autoimmune condition that causes bouts of fatigue and pain so I usually assume it’s that.

Husband struggles sometimes as he has to do more than his share of childcare and housework when I’m exhausted. I can sleep most of the day for a week or so after a bad flare. He thinks it’s part laziness but it’s that crushing fatigue that makes you too tired to eat or get dressed.

Then I have weeks of less pain, when I have normal energy, work full time out of the house, do all school runs, most of the cooking and cleaning.

It’s very up and down

FangsForTheMemory · 09/04/2021 20:07

Are you sleeping properly at night? I feel ill if I don't sleep well.

PolarnOPirate · 09/04/2021 20:11

God YANBU, we’ve only had a week of holidays so far and I’ve been falling asleep by 9pm every night 😄 back to school on the 19th ugh!

TheVolturi · 09/04/2021 20:18

I feel like this when I'm ovulating. I think I am possibly in peri and my ovaries and my body are trying their best to give me one last chance at getting pregnant (no bloody thank you)
I never used to get anything like this, in fact I felt no different to any other time in the month during ovulation, but now I feel knackered, bloated and like I'm coming down with something .
Doesn't actually fully go away until I get my period!