To ask what age you would let your kids go to the park alone?

[hellofrommetoyou]

Would you let a 7 year old girl and 10 year old boy to go to the park alone? Park is a two minute walk round the corner but cannot be seen from my house. No roads to cross on the way, just a huge big grassy area.

If you’re asking here... then you know deep down it’s not right. I would rather be in the park. Even if I wasn’t eyes on them the entire time.

What if? What if? You can never go back and change things.

No, I wouldn't. I let my 14 yr old take my 8 yr old to the shops and to play football but I'd say 10 and 7 is too young. Maybe at 12 and 9 or 10?

At 10 yes I do, but we live in a very nice area (touch wood), I put my Apple Watch on them (to track them but they don’t know that) and insist they come back for a certain time. I also insist if there is anyone even slightly unpleasant there then they are to come immediately home- not try and deal with it in any way.

In less than 18 months they will be expected to walk to school and back and probably let themselves in home- to me this is a baby step in preparation for that.

I think the expecting the 10 year old to be responsible for the younger sibling aged only 7 is wrong.
I have 16,12,10 and 7 aged kids.
I don’t even allow the 10 year old alone in the park yet. We live in a really good area. But it’s just happening yet. However. We are building up him walking to and from school alone soon. He’s nearly there.

Maybe your 10 year old is ready to be in the park alone. They’re all different aren’t they. But the huge issue I have is a 10 year old being responsible for the 7 year olds out of the house. Let alone in the house. Watch yourself there. If anything happens. God forbid. You would be held as negligent

@Bitofanexpert

In less than 18 months they will be expected to walk to school and back and probably let themselves in home- to me this is a baby step in preparation for that.

But not the 7 year old surely?!!

I very much doubt that a parent would be held negligent vickles

Sarah Payne was with older siblings IIRC.

@SmokedDuck it's not about infantalising children, it's about keeping them safe from predators who are more brazen these days. I do not want to play Russian roulette with DS's life in the name of giving him more "independence". I know the odds are small but when it comes to my child, I'm not prepared to take the chance.

DC were a mature 12 when allowed to go to park with friends.

www.gov.uk/law-on-leaving-your-child-home-alone

www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/in-the-home/home-alone/#

It’s personal choice at the end of the day. For me, it’s not something I’m prepared to gamble.

I have no issue with OP’s 10 year old. But I have issue with the 10 year old being responsible for their 7/8 yr old sibling outside of the house. That is my issue.

No not those ages, especially the 7yo. Youngest maybe 12 but a mature 12

Nooooo, not a 7 year old. Sorry I read the 10 year old part and focused on that. No they shouldn’t be responsible for another child at 10.

In the 90s though we all played on the same street going in and out of each other’s gardens/ houses (3 or 4 of us aged 8+), my husband was out wandering all over with his friends in his village from 6+. Different times and expectations I suppose.

@Ilovegreentomatoes

No I think 13+ tbh.

Do you have kids? How old are they?

Ours started going out by themselves during year 6. I wouldn’t expect the older one to be responsible for the younger one at that age though.

For those saying 13/14 have your kids not wanted more independence before then? Prior to lockdown our then 14 year old was getting a train across a city, changing trains and going to a skate park for the day with his friends.

Dd - v sensible, young in year so all friends older.
8.10 allowed to the shop alone, I supervised crossing the A road.

1. Allowed to shop alone.

9.11 allowed to walk home from school alone and to park with friends. 10 allowed to walk 1.5mi to nearby village to see friends. Just 11 started high school. Allowed within a couple of mile radius of home or country walks with a friend on agreed route. Has tracker on phone. Always a curfew.

DS - easily distracted. Likely to get lost in park.

Today discussed allowing him into shop on his own at 9.5 with us waiting outside. Likely age to allow him safely to the park on his own? About 25 on current behavior!

No, I wouldn’t.

No. I would let DD11 go with a friend but no expect her to take responsibility for her sister 8.

What relevance are the home alone threads? And Russian Roulette?? GAFG.

[quote Waxonwaxoff0]@SmokedDuck it's not about infantalising children, it's about keeping them safe from predators who are more brazen these days. I do not want to play Russian roulette with DS's life in the name of giving him more "independence". I know the odds are small but when it comes to my child, I'm not prepared to take the chance.[/quote]
What makes you think predators are more brazen?

Your child is more likely to die of a heart attack than be abducted by a stranger.

Thee is always a one in a million chance something bad could happen, but if people really wanted to follow the statistics what they would do is stop taking their kids in unnecessary trips in cars, and advocate for lower speed limits and pedestrian only areas.

Being independent isn't a silly luxury - children that learn to do it are less likely, for example, to take risks later on when they are significant.

It’s not about statistics though.

If my child is abducted it’s not really going to bring me any comfort to know that a million others didn’t.

Besides, it’s rare because opportunities to do so are rare. When children roamed freely, it was more common.

* Depends on you area. Where I live, absolutely not. I won't be allowing DS out on his own until he is at secondary school.*

@Waxonwaxoff0

You don’t want to play “Russian roulette” with your son’s life becuae how dreadful the area is you live in.

Totally fair enough.

Begs the question though - why live in such an area?

Where I live - minimal crime, real sense of community and local parks are wonderful for children.

Yes, probably. Mine started going at around age eight.

yes to the 10 year old - mine (almost 11)walks over to friends houses and to the park or shops; she is out for a couple of hours independently (but is very sensible, has a phone and we're in a safe area). No to the 7 year old, little siblings in my experience don't perfectly obey older siblings so the 10 year old might have issues keeping the little one in line and it's a big responsibility.

My 9yo goes to the park on her own (around the corner from us) and there are loads of kids on their own too - some probably as young as age 5/6. It’s a new estate in a very safe area. I might feel different if I lived in a city, but then again I have a friend who remembers travelling across London on his own at that age. I think it’s important for kids to have some independence and a chance to sort problems out by themselves.

[quote Waxonwaxoff0]@SmokedDuck it's not about infantalising children, it's about keeping them safe from predators who are more brazen these days. I do not want to play Russian roulette with DS's life in the name of giving him more "independence". I know the odds are small but when it comes to my child, I'm not prepared to take the chance.[/quote]
I get the fear, of course. But we have to look at the harm done when over-protecting our kids and not allowing them enough time outdoors with their friends. Perhaps rates of child abduction have gone down (I don't know, do we have stats on this) but rates of childhood obesity and mental ill-health have rocketed. When kids are allowed to go out to play they tend to be fitter and happier than kids kept indoors except under the close eye of a parent until their teens. My careful judgement on allowing my 10 year olds out with friends was based on balancing the tiny tiny risk of abduction against the very significant risk of mental ill health and lack of physical fitness that was likely if I kept them tied to my side.