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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

If each country had a two child policy

528 replies

Blackcat21 · 07/04/2021 16:38

Just an idea and my opinion, and fully aware I will probably get flamed for this.

The population is rising, not shrinking, and with that is coming ridiculous house prices, global warming, running low on natural resources and foods.

Health services are stretched and school classes are increasingly full.

Wouldn’t an solution to this be only letting per couple or mother/father have two biological children each.

I must admit, it does annoy me when some women go on to have 3rd, 4th child etc just because “they want to” or want a large family, love being with children or love being a mother.

Motherhood is a beautiful thing but it could be restricted to two biological children only.

Overpopulation is impacting the earth too much.

If this couple wanted more children they can adopt.
There are thousands of children in the U.K. and other countries each year wanting to be adopted.

Doing this could possibly tackle overpopulation but increase the adoption of children.

Obviously I’m aware there is problems of how to monitor this, what if a woman gets pregnant against her will, accidental pregnancies etc but not that is the not the point or idea I’m trying to get across right now.

AIBU to think this could be a good approach?

OP posts:
lynsey91 · 07/04/2021 18:27

@thebillyotea

Two children used to be the "norm".

what on earth are you talking about, when was that ever "the norm".

Of course it was. Of course there have always been some families with more than 2 but when I think about my school friends, neighbours etc and then, as I got older, work colleagues, friends, neighbours, by far the majority had 2 children.
thebillyotea · 07/04/2021 18:27

@Foxglovesandlilacs

You’d hate me op, I’ve got 8!
that's a lot of laundry, other MN posters will love you on other threads Grin

Large families are lovely but the logistic for holidays must be challenging!

thebillyotea · 07/04/2021 18:28

lynsey91
you might want to do some research, having a few friends from families of 2 never meant it was "the norm" Grin

Talk about a short-sighted view over a very short period of time!

jessstan2 · 07/04/2021 18:29

When I was a teenager I remember society being encouraged to have no more than two children and many did go on to have two. However having that enshrined in law with penalties for having more, forcing abortions, is not on in my opinion. It's also unfair that the well off would be able to afford and manage a larger family more easily than those with lower incomes.

Our prominent politicians often have more than two children, Boris is a prime example. Cameron and Clegg did. They hardly set an example.

I believe the idea is to replace each couple with a couple of children but there are people who have one and those who have no children.

It takes a very special sort of person to adopt and isn't an easy solution for those wanting more kids when you consider the hoops potential adopters have to go through. It doesn't always work out well either. I see other posters have mentioned the difficulties associated with adoption with which I concur, as an adopted child.

Therefore, no, I do not believe people should be instructed to have no more than two children.

lynsey91 · 07/04/2021 18:30

@Foxglovesandlilacs

You’d hate me op, I’ve got 8!
Good grief. Just why?
RaspberryBubblegum · 07/04/2021 18:30

Two children used to be the "norm". Now it seems almost every family has at least 3 children if not more.
Umm what? My grandma was one of 8 😂 people are having less children than before! The only difference is people are living to 90+. That's where your population growth is.

terribleg · 07/04/2021 18:30

Of course it was. Of course there have always been some families with more than 2 but when I think about my school friends, neighbours etc and then, as I got older, work colleagues, friends, neighbours, by far the majority had 2 children.

You need to look at statistical evidence not your neighbours. The birth rate is about 1.6!!!! the lowest it's ever been

RoseyMinerals · 07/04/2021 18:33

Judging by all the comments I guess David Attenborough was wrong then. Grin

thebillyotea · 07/04/2021 18:34

lynsey91

seriously, research "the norm"...

If each country had a two child policy
Getbusylivingorgetbusydying · 07/04/2021 18:34

Triplets?

QueenCoconut · 07/04/2021 18:35

Interestingly more than 1 in 3 people reading this post agree with OP’s suggestion.

I’ve noticed it is becoming less socially acceptable to have bigger families and people are often judged for having more than 2 children.

RoseyMinerals · 07/04/2021 18:35

The norm has reduced but the infant mortality was high back then. The population also wasn't several billions....

poppycat10 · 07/04/2021 18:36

@Getbusylivingorgetbusydying

Triplets?
I don't think anyone is expecting you to send one back with multiple births Grin
poppycat10 · 07/04/2021 18:38

I’ve noticed it is becoming less socially acceptable to have bigger families and people are often judged for having more than 2 children

Unless you are wealthy, as a pp said. I remember reading an article some years ago where rich people (men) said it was a status symbol to have 3 children (4 would be too many apparently, but 2 was too common, and I assume one meant you weren't virile).

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 07/04/2021 18:38

obviously I’m aware there is problems of how to monitor this, what if a woman gets pregnant against her will, accidental pregnancies etc but not that is the not the point or idea I’m trying to get across right now

Um, ok, but it’s pretty fucking fundamental isn’t it?

ancientgran · 07/04/2021 18:38

I've got 4, first marriage broke up, 2nd husband didn't have children and wanted some, I wanted more so 2 marriages, 3 adults, 4 children. Bit late for me to change it now.

5zeds · 07/04/2021 18:39

I have a large family and honestly only see major condemnation on MN.

Dadalus · 07/04/2021 18:39

I think overpopulation is a huge issue. Sure, population is expected to level off by the end of the century, great. But if it levels off at 11 billion, then takes another few decades just to get back to where we are now, that's a lot more time with a lot more people than we have now, and in developing countries most will be aspiring to meet western lifestyles and all the consumption that entails. So I can't understand how this is not a problem, am I missing something?

As for how to change things, obviously we'd never go down the route of enforced abortions/ contraception. But there's a world of difference between doing nothing, and starting to educate and build international consensus on this issue.

Totallyfedup1979 · 07/04/2021 18:40

In all honesty, I can’t imagine why people would have more than one anyway...

  • pregnancy was awful, everyday spent vomiting
  • the birth was atrocious - why would you do that more than once and no, I have never forgotten that pain! Plus, my tummy and boobs are certainly not what they were before a baby.
  • babies are hard work and constant worry! They also poop and wee everywhere.
  • toddlers can be naughty and mine drew all over the wallpaper. It’s hard to keep a neat home when toddlers are about.
  • kids are a pita and expensive! Sooooo expensive! They want everything! And they grow so quickly, it costs a fortune in clothing and shoes
  • teenagers...oh my god, I did not see that one coming and mine is an angel compared to most!
  • adult kids - well, being one, I know it doesn’t get easier.

Now I can understand one child. We all make mistakes Grin but people go on to do this 2, 3, 4 and even more times! Why??!!

lockdownalli · 07/04/2021 18:41

The increase in population is due to the ageing population, not increasing birth rates.

In the UK, if we don't start having more babies, there won't be enough lovely tax payers of working age to provide the funds to pay pensions or run anything much.

monkehsee · 07/04/2021 18:42

@Blackcat21

Alot of nitpicking saying I’m excluding fathers or finding parents for those adoptive children with additional needs.

That wasn’t my point, just the idea of controlling the population and cutting down on issues. The earth won’t last forever, we have to protect it.

I think you will find that overpopulation is a myth. If every one was to cut down on unnecessary waste, have a better distribution of wealth and not be ass holes flying everywhere on excessive holidays and chucking excessive crap in our oceans the population is just fine
Rukaya · 07/04/2021 18:43

obviously I’m aware there is problems of how to monitor this, what if a woman gets pregnant against her will, accidental pregnancies etc but not that is the not the point or idea I’m trying to get across right now

But it is the point. You can't just say "I think no-one should be allowed more than 2 kids" without saying how you think that should be done. It's pointless, and stupid. And you know already that it can't be done and you don't actually want any of what would need doing to actually be done.
Plus you're entirely talking to the wrong people,

terribleg · 07/04/2021 18:43

I’ve noticed it is becoming less socially acceptable to have bigger families and people are often judged for having more than 2 children.

It's because people think everyone has 10 dc & they are on benefits 🙄

Bishbashbosh101 · 07/04/2021 18:43

No.

Screwcorona · 07/04/2021 18:44

Theres not a population problem overall. Our main issue is our longer lifespans now, that we have an aged population either requiring care and other services to cost and retired based on old lifespans but needing pension payments for much longer.