To think asking someone you don’t really know whether they’ve had the vaccine is a bit personal

[Iheartbed]

I am currently suffering with the rare type of blood clot that’s in the news re the Oxford vaccine - CVST. I got it due to being pregnant and dehydrated (I ended up miscarrying). I may have a blood clotting disorder but don’t know for sure yet.

Not many people know this at work. I work in healthcare and the amount of people (staff and patients) asking me if I’ve had my vaccine bothers me. I don’t want to tell them why I haven’t had it as it involves personal troubles. But I don’t really know why they’re asking either. What’s it to them?
I hate lying. I just want to say “none of your bloody business!”

No, it's a perfectly reasonable question.

Being vaccinated is personal information that you don’t need to share with anyone. You are right it’s none of their business.

If you don’t want to lie then just say ‘oh I’m speaking to the GP about it’ or ‘not yet’

I don’t know if friends have had all their jabs for other diseases and have never felt the need to ask!

They are just making small talk , I don’t see the harm , just say not yet and change the subject

It’s probably small talk, but no one should really pressure you for info.

It’s not rude of them to ask.

You don’t have to answer at all, fully or truthfully.

Incredibly rude to ask personal health questions

In your situation, I'd just lie.

I'm sorry for what you've been through

Have you had the vaccine? is NOT a personal health question! 🙄

Honestly I just think of it as chat & more to cheer people up who I assume to be in categories that should have had it, e.g. older, healthcare workers. I can totally understand why you wouldn't want to talk about it. Though my intentions are to celebrate that so many people have had the vaccine & times are improving. I will try to change so I don't ask people directly from now on.

Greyhoundg1rl Asking someone if they have been vaccinated is wrong unless you are a HCP or an employer. It really is nobody's business but their's & maybe their family if they choose to discuss it. Would you ask someone their method of contraception or if they had their tonsils removed?

@Nat6999

Greyhoundg1rl Asking someone if they have been vaccinated is wrong unless you are a HCP or an employer. It really is nobody's business but their's & maybe their family if they choose to discuss it. Would you ask someone their method of contraception or if they had their tonsils removed?

No, bu it's not remotely the same thing so it's an invalid comparison.

What do you mean you don’t know why they are asking?
Of course they are asking to see if you’ve had the Astra Zeneca and whether you think it’s caused your blood clot. They are not interested in anything else. Sorry for your loss

No it's not. Not when it's the talk of the town. You don't have to answer though but they weren't rude to ask.

I’ve had that conversation with every single person I’ve chatted to, neighbours I’ve passed in the street, shop staff, family and friends on the phone, for the last 2 months. You are going to need to think of your preferred answer, because this question isn’t going to go away any time soon.

I think in your situation I would just say something like "unfortunately I can't have it yet for medical reasons"

@GreyhoundG1rl

Have you had the vaccine? is NOT a personal health question! 🙄

It is for non-HCP under 50. Because the only reasons they can have had it are health difficulties.

Different for the over 70s chat outside the paper shop. They all have a clear reason to be eligible

No, plenty of people under 50 have had the jab without having health conditions.

My immediate reaction was "no" - but I had my vaccine slightly ahead of when I would for my age, because of a health condition. So while I was "hurray, I've had my virus", it did feel a bit personal when asked why I'd been offered it.
So on that basis YANBU - but I think you're going to have to develop a thick skin - and I have asked people if they've had their vaccine or not, I hadn't really thought it through.

It is for non-HCP under 50. Because the only reasons they can have had it are health difficulties.

Not actually true.

I don't think it's a personal question, OP. Just chit chat. But I understand why you find it intrusive, given your circumstances. Maybe you just need to come up with a bland stock answer that shuts down the conversation.

I'm very sorry for your loss and that you're having to deal with these health issues on top of it all. It must be a bit weird hearing so much in the media about the condition that you're suffering with, especially when there isn't actually any connection in your case. I hope you make a speedy recovery.

Nah, I'm being asked all the time too. Its small talk - its not like people can discuss where we've been on holiday or what happened at the pub on Friday night is it?

And I know tonnes of people under 50 who've had it. Lots of over 40s have been vaccinated now, social workers, non-clinical NHS staff, I even know someone who was passing the vaccine centre when they asked if she wanted it because they'd had a lot of cancellations so had spare doses (it was a v snowy day).

I don't think people should ask but they are going to so maybe just have an answer prepared. Just say it's contraindicated for you and if they ask why then say that's personal. I would hope no one would ask why though!

People should just stop talking to each other in general

It's not rude, it's just a hot topic of conversation. Everyone we meet asks, there's not much else to talk about. Just say "yes", or "not yet".

I'm sorry you had a miscarriage and hope you are getting better. In your situation I can see why you find it rude.
I don't think asking about the vaccine in general is rude as it is a common conversation but I understand completely in your situation why it feels rude.

It’s not rude of them to ask; it’s not personal information. It’s just a question about a vaccine